Narcissists are everywhere, and everyone knows at least one narcissist in their lives. They are selfish, self-absorbed, and toxic to their core, and no matter how hard you may try to make them see the light, they will always choose darkness. If you have been tormented by narcissists, or know a few, these are some of the best books on narcissism that you can read to better understand how they function and what you can do to tackle them effectively.
If you know a narcissist, you would know how problematic, entitled, and emotionally draining they can be. The only person they care about is themselves and they could care less about the people around them. Even if you are the best thing in their lives, they will treat you like garbage.
Things can feel very depressing, emotionally taxing, and bleak when you are intricately connected to a narcissist. But there is a way you CAN help yourself and also protect yourself from their toxicity. Reading a few books about narcissistic relationships or books about NPD can help you tremendously.
Read on to know more about the 9 powerful books on healing from narcissistic abuse.
Related: But Why Did the Narcissist Do That?
9 Best Books On Narcissism You Cannot Afford To Miss
1. Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry by Albert Bernstein, Ph.D
Goodreads Rating: 3.9
Dr. Albert Bernstein does an amazing job at showing us who emotional vampires are, how many types are there, and how they suck the happiness out of you. He talks about all the different kinds of emotional vampires – paranoid, histrionic, obsessive-compulsive, and narcissistic, and teaches you how to identify and differentiate between them.
He gives you the best guidance and tips regarding what you can do to protect yourself from their machinations, and deal with them in the right way before they completely drain you of your happiness and joy. He mentions real-life experiences in order to better elucidate how they function in real-life.
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2. Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed by Wendy T. Behary, LCSW
Goodreads Rating: 3.7
When you have a family member, close friend, spouse, or even a work colleague displaying symptoms of narcissism, you know very well that it’s not all that easy to just cut ties and ignore them. Ideally, you should always kick the narcissist out of your life, but in such cases, if that’s not an option, you need to know the right methods of dealing with them.
It’s not a surprise that this book is one of the best books about narcissism out there. This book teaches you exactly how to reach into your inherent qualities such as compassion, empathy, and understanding, to deal with them in the right way. You will gradually understand how they think, feel and see the world, so that you can put the right boundaries in place to protect yourself, and become aware of their problematic behaviors.
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Related: Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: Can You Go Back To Being The Person You Were Before Narcissistic Abuse?
3. The New Science of Narcissism: Understanding One of the Greatest Psychological Challenges of Our Time―and What You Can Do About It by W. Keith Campbell. Ph.D.
Goodreads Rating: 3.8
Everybody is slowly becoming aware of narcissism, as awareness and knowledge about it grow day by day. If you genuinely want to learn more about it, understand the different kinds of narcissism, and how to tackle them, then this book is a godsend.
There’s a reason why this is one of the best books on narcissism. Dr. Campbell investigates the science behind narcissism and Narcissistic Personality Disorder and gives valuable insight as to how to deal with them, how they function, and how you can identify the narcissists in your life and personal relationships.
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4. Why Can’t I Just Leave: A Guide to Waking Up and Walking Out of a Pathological Love Relationship by Kristen Milstead, Ph. D.
Goodreads Rating: 5
When you’re in love with a narcissist, it can be very difficult to just give up on them, cut ties and leave for good. Despite all the abuse, pain, and torment they have put you through, you still struggle with leaving them and constantly doubt and chastise yourself for being a “quitter”. What you don’t realize is that the narcissist in your life manipulated and gaslighted you into being like this.
This is probably one of the best narcissist books you can get your hands on if you find it hard to leave your narcissistic partner/spouse. This book will help you deal with the emotional abuse they have put you through, motivate you to choose yourself and your happiness, and finally let go of them, so that you can build a happy and peaceful life for yourself.
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5. Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You by Susan Forward, Ph.D
Goodreads Rating: 4.1
This book is not just about narcissists or narcissism, it also deals with a majority of people who always use the tool of emotional blackmail. Emotional blackmail is their favorite way of getting what they want from others, and it doesn’t matter to them, the damage they might be causing.
If you are in a relationship where your needs and expectations don’t matter, you’re always shut down whenever you try to stand up for yourself and you’re always treated like a second-class citizen, then this is the book for you.
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Related: 9 Things You Can Do To Help Someone Healing From Narcissistic Abuse
6. Children of the Self-Absorbed: A Grown-Up’s Guide to Getting Over Narcissistic Parents by Nina W Brown EdD LPC
Goodreads Rating: 3.9
Nina Brown talks about narcissism and narcissistic individuals in great depth, especially narcissistic parents, and how it feels to be raised by them. This book takes you through how it feels like to grow up with narcissistic parents, and the emotional, mental, and psychological toll it takes on you. Easily one of the best narcissists books out there.
Having narcissistic parents also affects your ability to interact and communicate with others in a healthy way, and also makes it difficult for you to have healthy, stable relationships in your adulthood. This book helps you understand how narcissistic parents function, and how to deal with the psychological and emotional damage they subject you to.
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7. Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited by Sam Vaknin
Goodreads Rating: 4.1
One of the top rated books on narcissism out there, it’s not really a surprise that this book has a cult following. Sam Vaknin is a self-proclaimed narcissist himself and this book is written from the point of view of a narcissistic person. It beautifully takes you into the mind of a narcissist and helps you understand how one thinks and operates.
This is an amazing book to read, if you are looking to have an in-depth understanding of narcissism, what makes a narcissist so toxic, their background, and why they are the way they are.
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8. Traumatic Narcissism and Recovery: Leaving the Prison of Shame and Fear (Relational Perspectives Book Series) by Daniel Shaw
Goodreads Rating: 4.8
Psychoanalyst and author, Daniel Shaw takes a deep dive into narcissism, narcissistic relationships, and the trauma they cause. He eloquently speaks about the mental and emotional damage narcissists cause their victims, and how their victims can slowly work towards healing themselves.
Getting out of the shame spiral and finding the strength to heal from narcissistic abuse is what this book aims to help you with. This is one of the best books on narcissism out there for survivors of narcissistic abuse, as well as therapists treating victims of narcissistic abuse.
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Related: What Narcissists Think And What They Say
9. Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life: At Home. At Work. With Friends by Linda Martinez-Lewi Ph.D
Goodreads Rating: 3.7
One of the best books on Narcissistic Personality Disorder on the market, Linda Martine-Lewi aims to help and provide support to survivors of narcissistic abuse, and also give them the much-needed knowledge and tools to free themselves permanently from narcissistic behavior.
She beautifully writes about how you can take back your power, confidence, peace of mind, and emotional well-being, and build a happy and positive life for yourself away from all the negativity of the narcissist. She knows how emotionally draining and depressing it can be to be with a narcissist, and how freeing it feels to finally move on from them.
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Now, since we are already talking about narcissism, how do you think it feels to be in a relationship with a narcissistic person? What happens when you fall in love with a narcissist? Someone whose sole purpose is to hurt you and destroy you?
In situations like this, it’s crucial to know how to protect yourself from such toxic people and relationships and how to build the right sort of boundaries.
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These are some of the best books on narcissism out there right now, and even though they might not be able to solve all your struggles and problems, they can indeed go a long way in helping you figure things out, one step at a time. Have you read any of these books? Let us know your thoughts in the comments down below!
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