I’m not single. I’m not taken. I’m simply on reserve for the one who deserves my heart.” ~ Unknown
I’m not bitter or spiteful but seriously—I’m just going to start dating myself.
It’s not that I can’t find a date, but I don’t want to date just anyone.
The biggest problem is that I am happy just doing my own thing.
As true as this is though, I would welcome a man coming in and turning my world upside down and telling me once and for all how it was going to be played.
But no one is doing that right now, so rather than just wait around for a date, I’m going to live it up instead.
I am done with accepting less than what I want and deserve—and fortunately my bullsh*t radar is sensitive and I can spot the players and narcissists a mile away.
I can tell the difference in a man’s gaze and whether he is just after the curves of my body, or if it’s the bends in the road of my mind that he desires to traverse the most.
I know whether I am valued or just desired—and while I don’t want perfection or riches—I do need a man to be on his own game before he steps to me.
Because the thing is, I know that I am kind of a catch—and while the superficial doesn’t impress me—confidence and authenticity do.
That is why I have decided to just date myself.
I enjoy long evenings by myself, roaming through the market, stopping and smelling ripe fruits and planning meals that excite and delight my senses.
I love turning up the music in my house as loud as I want, and with an intoxicating sway in my hips I lick the delicious spices from my fingers while I cook—smiling simply because I am happy.
I don’t need someone to take me out and spend money on me to make me feel loved and until a man comes along who will be content watching me dance barefoot in the kitchen while I cook for us, I’m happy living a life I love.
I don’t need a man to take me out to a movie just so I am not alone.
The truth of it is—I rather like my own living room and my own company.
Because I’ve realized there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely.
I am alone.
I am single, and while I want a man in my life and know that in many ways I need one as well—I’m not lonely.
I have an amazing career, friends that never cease to amaze me with their love and support and a family who always has my back—but most importantly, I love myself too.
I’m not self-centered or self-absorbed saying this, but healthy.
Because if we haven’t fallen in love with ourselves—then how can we ever expect anyone else to?
I love my own company just fine—but more than that, I know myself.
In all of my quiet nights I have discovered who I am and how I like it.
I know all the ways that I like to spend my time and what type of foods are my favorites.
I know what I believe in and I know what kind of love I am hoping for.
And most importantly, I know what kind of woman I am.
So, while I am single for now, I’m good with it.
Because I know now that I don’t want just any man.
I want a warrior, a golden hearted king among men, who will be regarded because of his intentions and loyalty, his morals and his courage.
A man whose heart will be his greatest feature.
This man will stand in awe of me, yet have no problem telling me when I am wrong.