I’ve come to realize that I can’t do everything on my own, no matter how many times I repeat to myself that I’m strong, and brave, and able to defeat all of my worries.
I still have days when I don’t know what I’m doing, where I’m going, who am I living for. I still go to bed hoping to wake up in a different body, because the one that I have seems to be so lost, so broken.
Sometimes I stumble on the ground from running so fast, stare at my scraped knee, and be terrified of my own blood. I’m scared to witness the result of my own mess.
I’m scared to know that I’m not good enough to protect myself. And whatever I do, I will never beat my imperfections.
But I’m glad that I have friends who are just around the corner, ready to step out, and offer me their helping hands to stand back up.
I’m happy that I have someone else to assist me clean my wound and soothe it with their touch. I quickly become at peace after knowing that I have someone who’s willing to accompany me until I feel better.
I have someone who reminds me that I don’t have to walk and leave my footprints on this earth solo. I don’t have to finish my own sentence and sing all the lyrics to a song.
I don’t have to laugh at funny scenarios by myself. And I don’t have to spend the rest of the night wondering if someone loves me.
Because I know that I have friends who make a special place for me in their lives. Friends who are one hundred percent down to turn my life into a crazy one.
Friends who never run out of energies from midnight until the sun comes out. Friends who drag me into weekend breakfasts even though I look like hell and am too depressed to even get out of my bed.
Friends I can always dial when I’m on the verge of tears, when I can’t slow down my thoughts, when I get confused about my future.
I have friends who genuinely care about me and look after me. And I will always be thankful for them. I will always appreciate them because they never miss a beat in making sure that I’m okay.
They never stop flooding my inbox with messages until they know that I come home safe. They won’t let the day end without getting an assurance that I’m not hiding anything. And they won’t let me go on my own still hurting from a broken heart.
They are the kind of friends who still love me even after learning my ugliest secrets. They still stay beside me and don’t get tired of seeing me fall apart.
I owe most of my happiness in life to my friends. I know I won’t make it through in this world without them. I won’t survive my darkest days without their lights in front of me.
I won’t achieve some of my successes without their undying support and encouragements.
And I can’t thank them enough for being my guardian angels after all these times. I can’t thank them enough for cheering me up when I barely say a word.
I can’t thank them enough for being my compass when I’m directionless, for being my pain reliever when soul is aching, for being my home when I’m desperate for comfort.
I will forever remember my friends as the ones who are sent from above. The ones I can no longer live without. And the ones I’m keeping in my heart until I draw my final breathe.
My friends are reminder for me that I don’t have to carry all the burdens in the world.
Because I have good people in my life who are always ready to help me lift the heaviness in my shoulder. I have good people who care about my sufferings. I have good people I can rely on.
And with them, I don’t have to feel so alone.
For more of his writing, like his Facebook page here: Angelo Caerlang – writer
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