5 Things Parents Do Who Raise Good Kids: Harvard Psychologists

5 Things Parents Do Who Raise Good Kids: Harvard Psychologists

What’s the secret recipe to raise good kids?

Technology has taken over the world and raising children now is very different from before the smartphones, computers, internet, tablets, and other gadgets came into being. There used to be parks filled with children, kids running across the streets trying to catch butterflies. They played real football and not on their Xbox consoles either. They tried to find out their hiding friend rather than a Pokémon on screen. They would play until the sun went down and they then came indoors. Raising children now is way more different than it used to be a few decades ago but it’s time we got back to basics.

Related: How Your Childhood Shapes Your Adult Life

In this new era, children are given new gadgets automatically to entertain them. There are loopholes in this new trend. What are they? Psychologists at Harvard University conducted a study on what makes a well-adjusted child in this ever-changing time. They concluded that there are several aspects that are still very basic.

Below are some secrets to raise good kids, according to Harvard psychologists:

1. Give Them Your Time

No gift or gadget can equal the time you spend with them. Giving them your time is like giving them a part of your life and that is exactly what they deserve and what they need. It is a simple suggestion but we are bombarded 24/7 with work and have busy lives just to stay in the race. It’s easier to give a child a toy or an Xbox console to keep them busy and, of course, get away from our responsibilities towards them. To raise good kids, give them your time.

Related: The Dangers of Distracted Parenting: Why Parents Need To Put Down Their Phones

When you give time to your kids, be with them in person, interact or play with them, go on a trip with them, or simply read a book, these become the gifts they will cherish forever. They won’t remember what you bought for them but the time you spent with them will always be with them.

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2. Speak Out Loud To Your Children

It is linked to spending time with your child. Finding out what’s going on in your child’s life. Check with teachers, coaches, trainers, and other caretakers. Find out if there has been any unusual behavior lately. Make room for your child, make sure they are comfortable to come and speak to you. Your child needs to feel they are loved and they are important to you and giving them things they desire is not enough. Acknowledge it through words. Let them hear they are loved and appreciated. Invite them to sit with you and share their stories about school, friends, etc.

Related: Stop Screaming At Your Child


3. Teach Them Problem-Solving Skills

One of the greatest gifts you can give your child is the ability to analyze and solve problems.

Let your child make his own decisions. You cannot solve their issues all the time. It’s healthy to let them have the first-hand experience in dealing with the ups and downs of life. When we allow them to determine what they want we are raising their awareness at the same time while gifting them leadership qualities.

Let them come to you with their problems and then only guide them. It is hard as parents to sit back and watch your child make mistakes but that’s ok. That is how they will learn and that is how self-sufficient adults are made. We need to make sure happiness comes before achievement. We need to teach our children to be happy first. Success is not the ultimate goal. Success will not bring fulfillment. Let happiness come first.


4. Show Them Gratitude

Children need to learn that gratitude is a remarkable gift. Parents should give their children chores and then express how grateful they are for the accomplishment. Honor and acknowledge them for their performance in whatever they do. We shouldn’t praise only the uncommon acts of kindness and achievements.

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