Mindful Dating: Here’s How You Can Avoid Disappointments While Dating

Mindful Dating: How To Avoid Disappointments While Dating

Don’t Date Until You Read This

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You want a deep, meaningful relationship – with someone who sticks by you.

But all you’re meeting are people who can barely make a commitment for next weekend, let alone a lifetime.

You’re tired of going on dates and coming up empty. You’re tired of the devastating cycle of getting your hopes up over somebody only to have everything come crashing down again and having to start over.

SOMETHING has to change.

So let’s change things right now, beginning with your mindset.

“It seems essential, in relationships and all tasks, that we concentrate only on what is most significant and important.” – Soren Kierkegaard

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Mindful Dating: The Critical Mindset Shift That Attracts Love

As long as you view dating as a chore, you’re going to hate it. And you’re going to show up from this negative stance, which is not conducive to getting the results you want.

First, negativity isn’t attractive. And people will sense it, even if you’re not directly communicating how much you dislike dating.

Second, staying stuck in negativity takes your focus away from what truly matters in finding love.

“It is the same way with dating. The time you are most prepared for dating is when you don’t need anyone to complete you, fulfill you, or instill in you a sense of worth or purpose.” – Myles Munroe

You’ll start relationships with unsuitable people simply because you want to stop dating, and you’ll lose sight of what really matters to you.

I know it can be hard to be positive about something that has brought you so much grief, and it’s hard to know where to start.

That’s why, after working with hundreds of single patients over the past 40+ years, I’ve developed a 3-step process that automatically shifts you into a positive mindset about dating AND primes you to find the love of your life. The 3 steps are:

  • Knowing who you are
  • Knowing what you want, and
  • Knowing what to do (and what to avoid) from the first moments of connection

This 3 step process – although seemingly simple – can completely TRANSFORM your dating experiences. Let me explain a little more about each one.

3 Steps To Mindful dating to Avoid Disappointments when dating

1) Knowing Who You Are

The most important person in this dating game is YOU. Before you become intimate with anyone, you must have an intimate relationship with yourself.

And by that, I mean that you need to sharpen your self-awareness – including what has made you the person you are, what you have to offer a partner, and even what you need to improve.

This complete package is what you are asking another person to love, so YOU need to love it first.

With a clear understanding of who you are and what you bring to a relationship, you also need to know how to present your “package” to potential partners.

I have sat with countless wonderful people who came to my office very unsure of themselves, with a vague understanding of who they were. These same people inevitably would get involved in relationships that never quite got off the ground.

When you embrace your whole self, you will be able to show up with confidence, strength, and compassion – instead of getting thrown off by the pressures of modern dating.

“Dating is about finding out who you are and who others are. If you show up in a masquerade outfit, neither is going to happen.”- Henry Cloud

 

2) Knowing What You Want (And Don’t Want)

You may have heard that you find love when you’re not looking for it, but that’s not exactly true.

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Dr. Randi Guntherhttp://www.randigunther.com/
In her 40-year-career as a clinical psychologist and marriage counselor, She Had Spent Over 100,000 face-to-face hours with singles and couples helping them to sort out their desires and conflicts about intimate relationships. She Had explored all the reasons why their relationships so often start out euphoric only to crumble and how they can turn those disappointments into future successes. She truly believe that the greatest obstacles standing between you and the love you want is often right before your eyes but you are unable to envision the journey. Her specialty is to help you look at yourself and your relationships with heroic honesty and the willingness to look deeply at yourself and what you bring to a relationship so that you can finally create the kind of transformation that will change you forever. You'll finally understand why you've struggled in love, and what skills you'll need to create the kind of relationship you've always wanted - one in which you fall deeper in love while simultaneously scaling the heights of your individual potential. It's how her husband and She have made their marriage their bedrock for over 60 years. Subscribe to her free advice newsletter at www.heroiclove.com where she'll tell you everything she has learned about finding and keeping a truly heroic relationship.
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