Even with something as convenient as internet dating, you should still be focusing on the integrity of any relationship. It’s not just a case of browsing through profiles and choosing someone, then assuming you’ll hit it off. You should always be thinking about the wider picture – in other words, focus on mindful dating. There are various aspects to pay close attention to.
Here are do’s and don’ts of mindful dating.
1. Do remain focused on your common goals
No matter how well any relationship is progressing, it will be inevitable that either party will become focused on their aspirations at some point. But it is important to keep shared goals in mind. Having something in common to look forward to will bring you so much closer together. Rather than simply meandering through your relationship, you will have a clear strategy which you can collaborate on. This will encourage you to keep touching base, ensuring you are in full agreement at each step of this progress. As soon as there are any issues, these can be brought into focus.
2. Do seek common ground, where possible
Your mindful dating, it is crucial that you feel able to meet each other halfway whenever there are moments of dispute. In any relationship, there will inevitably be ups and downs, simply because we are all complicated beings and few partnerships coast along on neutral as a default. As long as you are able to keep issues in perspective they should be readily addressed. Communication is the key to a successful relationship based on mindful dating. Everything should be brought into the open.
3. Do be aware of the need to show compassion
Sometimes we can become self-absorbed when we feel our pride has been compromised. This isn’t necessarily through any narcissistic tendencies, it’s human nature to put your interests first and foremost. However, with mindful dating, we need to be able to put the common good of the relationship first. During disagreements, if your partner is showing distress, no matter how much you might think you are not the guilty party, always be prepared to reach out. This empathy also applies when they are requiring your support during moments solely affecting them.
1. Don’t allow minor disagreements to escalate
With mindful dating, you always need to respect your significant other. This sometimes means taking the lead whenever there are disagreements and recognizing the moments where crossroads present themselves. What this means in practical terms is you are able to sense where you have arrived at a juncture where you could either stand your ground, maintain an inflexible outlook, knowing full well the argument will merely be exacerbated, or you could relax, accept there will never be a winner in this situation, and relinquish your hold on your point of view. The default for any relationship built on mindful dating is that any negative situation should always be nipped in the bud and resolved before escalation.
2. Don’t Cheat
When it comes to being in a healthy relationship, one of the first things that you and your partner should agree on is what is classified as “cheating.” While you may think any time your partner kisses another person is cheating, as you are going to read below, you may not think that way if you lived in certain parts of Europe. There was research conducted that discovered which countries had high rates of infidelity, as well as what these countries’ general stance on the matter was.
-By Jonathan Draper