What makes a man great? What traits separate the best of men from the rest of men? High quality men possess certain values that define their personality, thought, actions and behavior. Not all men are created equal. But all men have the ability to achieve greatness. All you need to do is develop these 25 qualities of a good man and separate yourself from the flock.
25 Virtues Found In The Best Of Men
What are some of the best qualities we find in men? Chuck Chapman has a list.
Marcus Aurelius wrote, โWaste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.โ
I particularly like this quote, because as the new year has started, Iโve been thinking a lot about what it means to be a good man, specifically about being a man of good character. I know that I havenโt always been a good man. Iโve done some pretty shitty things in my life, but at the same time I am grateful for my experiences and struggles because they have forged and changed my character for the better.
As a result, Iโve learned there are a lot of things I canโt change. I canโt change my eye-color, my height, and I certainly cannot change my past. Yet, I believe anyone can change their character โฆ itโs not easy, but it is possible. For me, the first step was defining my values. I noticed that when I lived in accordance with my values I developed virtues. I found that with practice and dedication to living within these virtues, I am becoming a good man.
Character is reflected in our behaviors, and often our behaviors are influenced by our beliefs. By defining our virtues, we solidify our beliefs about our values. Once defined, we have a blueprint to guide our actions as we strive to live a virtuous life.
Related: Nice Guys Arenโt Good Men โ Know the Difference
Here are 25 foundational virtues that I use as my map for living.
1. HONOR
Honor is respecting those over you and acting in a way that is deserving of respect from those under you. Honor is the reputation and alliance that you earn from those you serve and those who serve you.
2. COURAGE
Courage isnโt the absence of fear, itโs the strength to move forward in the face of fear. Courage is perhaps the most vital virtue to develop. When we feel the fear and do it anyway we develop courage.
3. COMPASSION
The ability to step outside of yourself and perform an act of selflessness: this is the foundation of compassion. To be compassionate is to value others above yourself for the sole purpose of contributing to the greater good.
Related: 12 Tips To Self-Love And Compassion
4. RESPECT
The respect you show to others is a reflection of your self respect. For this reason, respect is something you do for yourself. That doesnโt mean you have to agree with others, but you simply value yourself enough to give others respect.
5. LOYALTY
Staying true to yourself and standing by someone elseโs side when they face adversity is mastery of loyalty. Never giving up on someone, no matter how hard it gets, for as long as it takes: that is the true measure of any great relationship.
Related: 7 Reasons Why Good Men Donโt Cheat On Their Partners
6. HONESTY
You are only as good as your word. If your word isnโt worth anything, then you have lost a piece of your soul. Being honest is difficult, but it is the bedrock of character. A house is only as strong as its foundation.
7. PRUDENCE
Prudence is the capacity to face reality squarely in the eye, without allowing emotion or ego to get in the way, and do what is best for the team.
8. GRACE
Grace is giving something to someone who hasnโt earned it, doesnโt deserve it and yet we give it anyway. Simply put, grace is giving someone dessert even though they didnโt eat their vegetables.
9. FORGIVENESS
When we forgive we are giving up our right to collect on a debt. โAn eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind,โ said Gandhi. When I no longer have the need for revenge, then I have forgiven.
10. HUMILITY
Humility is the leadership quality of taking the brunt of the blame when things go south and giving away the majority of the credit when things go well. The leader who practices humility will never ask anyone to do what they themselves cannot do. Humility is leading from a position of service.
11. AUTHENTICITY
Being true to yourself isnโt easy. Pulling off the mask that hides your flaws and living in the fullness of who your are creates a contagion that gives others the courage to do the same.
12. EXCELLENCE
Excellence is striving is to be better than the day before, never giving in to the voice that says, โThatโs good enough.โ Instead, listen for the voice that says, โNow thatโs awesome!โ
Excellence has a price tag, and the price is practice, practice, practice.
13. KINDNESS
There is strength in kindness. A simple smile, a kind word or even an arm on a shoulder can change someoneโs life for the better and thereby change the world โฆ Kindness is your super-power.
14. GRATITUDE
Did you know you canโt be resentful and grateful at the same time? Try it.
To be truly grateful is to consider all the gifts you have been given and to understand that no matter what, there is always something for which to be grateful.
Related: Attitude Of Gratitude: How The Universal Law of Gratitude Can Help You
15. PATIENCE
There is no truer act of love than patience โฆ just ask anyone who has raised a two-year-old.
16. COMMITMENT
Do what you say youโre going to do without excuse. Suit up, show up everyday, and give your best effort.
17. TENACITY
Tenacity is the ability to stick it out and never give up, to keep going when things are tough and there is no end in sight. This is the only way to live a life of contentedness because regret only happens when we give up.
18. TACT
Be honest, but be tactful. Remember there is another human being on the other end of your words. Strive to live by the golden rule, โDo unto others as you would have them do unto you.โ
19. GENEROSITY
Maya Angelou said, โPeople wonโt remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.โ Be generous with how you treat everyone โฆ they will feel amazing and so will you.
20. EMPATHY
Empathy is the ability to put aside your ego, step into someone elseโs shoes and experience their emotions. When we do this, we create connection. The number one emotional need we all have is for connection.
Related: 10 Signs You Have Above Average Empathy
21. CONTENTMENT
Dissatisfaction is the misconception that you need more than what you already have. Contentment is a mind-set: itโs choosing not to look at lack but see the abundance that already exists.
22. ASSERTIVENESS
Unapologetically go after what you want in life. Be assertive and let the world feel the full weight of who you are. Live with passion โฆ without being a jackass.
23. COOPERATION
The most important virtue for success is the ability to cooperate. If you canโt play well with others youโre going to get kicked out of the sandbox. Learn to cooperate and youโll be successful.
24. ADAPTABILITY
โImprovise, Adapt and Overcomeโ is the mantra of the United States Marine Corps. Adaptability is the ability to be flexible to change and gain the advantage in any situation. Things that arenโt adaptable break โฆ things that arenโt adaptable donโt survive.
25. INTEGRITY
Integrity is the solidarity of our virtues; it is the quality by which we live out our values and prioritize our principles. It is the culmination of character in action. To act with integrity is to be a good man.
Written by Jed Diamond Ph.D
Originally appeared in The Goodmen Project
Here is an interesting video that you may find interesting:
Develop The Qualities Of A Good Man
If you developed these virtues, what kind of a man do you think you would become? These 25 qualities of a good man can help shape your character and reputation for the better and escalate you to the ranks of the best men.
Although we may not be born perfect, by applying the traits, virtues and qualities of a good man, we can all put in some effort to become better. Choose to be your best self and start treading down the path of personal development until you become the best you can be.
Related: 11 Ways You Know Youโre With A Good Man
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