Every ‘single’ individual needs to make the choice to wait for the type of love that doesn’t want to change you but helps you grow.
We fall in love with a person for who they are, accepting them as they are, in their entirety. Falling in love for what they could become is absurd. I am sorry but that’s not love. The moment you try to mold someone into who you think they should be is the moment it stops being love.
Getting into a relationship with the hope that the person will change i.e stop or start doing certain things is like shooting yourself in the leg on the first day.
Desiring a change in the person we love is not loving but it’s us wanting them to become something they are not, something we would like them to be to satisfy our own ego. Everybody has faults, and expecting the other person to be ideal and perfect is honestly, hypocritical.
Love is more about loving someone for exactly who they are and this my friend needs a lot of courage. The concept of trying to change someone is like taking patches of clothes and sewing them together until we feel this suits us best now, exactly that much absurd.
When we expect change from our partner we lose sight of what our partner aspires to become and where they are headed and instead of allowing them to grow as they are and achieve what they want to achieve we create hurdles for them because we want them to grow in only ways we want.
How about clearing your mind and being open to differences? How about accepting the fact that you and your partner are not the same people, and the beauty of it all lies in your differences?
Loving someone for who they are without expectations of change but growth, knowing someday they will grow different but on their own and still remain who they are. Growing the way they like and become a better version of themselves.
Nobody likes to be changed, nobody wants someone to tell them that they could be better if they wear this & this or speak this way or do things this way. No matter if that person loves you, you wouldn’t like he/she instructed you to become someone you’re not. If your sole motivation is to change your partner, and turn them into a second you, then what is even the point of being in a relationship with them?
Well to find such love who doesn’t want to change you but hopes you grow, you need to make a choice to wait. Finding someone who will grow with you takes times but it is totally worth it. Finding someone who will grow with you takes a lot of courage and faith, but when was anything worthwhile ever easy? Loving someone who loves just the way you are, now that’s something marvelous!
Related: 8 Signs Your Relationship Has What It Takes To LAST
Relationship with chains leads you nowhere, the best kind of relationship is where you are free to follow your heart and there are no terms which you need to live by, no insecurities, and no fear of disappointing. The best kind of partner will want to help with your evolution and growth, and always focus on supporting you mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
A love like this doesn’t mean that you don’t care about your partner or treat them poorly but rather means that you love them enough to let them follow their heart and inspire them to grow. A love wherein ego has no place and you let each other soar. A love that helps you become better. A love that helps you become more of who you already are. A love that will show you a mirror and not a portrait of who you should become or who they want you to become.
When you are in love with someone who hopes to grow with you and not change you, you lie in their arms peacefully knowing you’re free and there is no need to be anyone else, other than you, because they accept you exactly for who you are.
The love that accepts your fear and insecurities, demons and darkness, your wounds and scars and embraces them with a kiss for they are what made you who you are today, rather than trying to erase them and change you.
Most of us step back when we encounter this type of love and keep going back to the type of love where you always feel you’re guilty and not good enough.
Life is full of possibilities and there is something new to explore every day. We are meant to try new things and learn new experiences and the best part is there are certain lovers who will understand this and help us do this all. They will never try to control us, or stop us from living our lives fully; rather they will hold our hands and explore the unknown together.
What one desires or what one is capable of cannot be judged by our limited ideas hence we should let one grow to their limits, instead of trying to change them we should inspire them and watch as the magic unfolds.
Related: 9 Thoughts That Prove You’re In A Genuinely Healthy Relationship
When you choose to love someone for who they are you are choosing to grow with them and setting two souls on an eternal journey.
Someone that will make you better but not change you, someone that will reintroduce you to yourself, someone that will love your scars and embrace your darkness, someone that will set your soul free, wait for him.
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