6 Mistakes That Land You In The Friend Zone

The Friend Zone is a place we all have dreaded to visit, but you could accidentally land up just there.




You try to play it cool on the first few dates because you don’t want to be deemed “needy”, “high maintenance”, “aggressive”, or “desperate”.

You make a point of highlighting your common interests. You both like football, you both like the art fair on Sundays, you are both foodies so you stay on that common ground of topics because they are safe and surface and fun and easy to talk about.



At the end of the date, you go “Dutch”, hug, say goodbye, and you feel like you had a pretty great date. And it was a great time…for friends.

Where is the romance? What happened to the wooing?

Beware: you very well could be on the brink of falling into the friend zone!




Knowing how to get out of the friend zone is all about setting the precedent from the onset.

Here are the 6 mistakes, each of which could land you in the friend zone:

1. You went “Dutch”.

Do you want a friend, a colleague, a business partner or do you want a relationship partner?

He is paying for dinner. Paying = providing (masculine). Cooking/gifting = nurturing (feminine). We will go more into this (plus alternative ways that the woman can “pay”) in a future article.

Related: Friend To Boyfriend: 4 Key Tips To Get Out of The Friend Zone

2. You talk about fun and surface topics.

If you eventually want the clothes to come off, you’ve got to dig beyond the exterior by being real and getting raw. That’s how you stand out and create a heart connection.




3. You forgot to flirt!

It’s about the little things — the side glance, the “secret smile”, the little touches, and the flirtatious and slightly (but not overtly) sexy comments.

4. You act like a buddy.

Hanging out at sports bars, not putting effort into how you look, going Dutch; these are all symptoms of friendships. It’s OK to share the same interests.

Women, it’s OK if you are a huge sports fan. But remember that you are looking for a boyfriend, not a buddy. You can still be sexy and cheer on your favorite team.

5. You think you’re being sarcastic, but you’re actually being a bitch or a jerk.

I know you want to be witty and always have a comeback, and I agree! That banter can be extremely sexy and can be a great technique when it comes to flirting.

But there is a difference between sarcastic and being bitchy or a jerk, and it’s too often confusing. Take the edge off. Imagine that they said to you what you said to them.

How does it sound?

Related: 8 Ways A Guy Acts Around You When He Likes You And What It Means

6. You’re easy-going…too easy-going.

You don’t require dates. You just kind of “hang out”. You’re missing the chase and moving right into what you consider to be “relationship mode”. But you’re wrong. You’ve been friend-zoned.




Honestly, a lot of it is about gender roles. Be feminine. Be masculine. Be in your gender power!

The more feminine you are, the more masculine he feels. The more masculine you are, the more feminine she feels.

Stop being androgynous. I know. it’s a modern world. But you have more power in your gender role than you ever allowed yourself to embrace.


Written by Laurel House
Originally appeared on Yourtango
6 Mistakes You Make That Land You In The Friend Zone pin
mistakes friend zone
6 Mistakes Land You Friend Zone Pin


Published On:

Last updated on:

Laurel House

Laurel House is a published author, International Celebrity Dating, Relationship, Empowerment, and Performance Coach, expert for Match.com, and host of ‘The Man Whisperer’ podcast. She is direct, focused, passionate, strong, and feminine. Her no-games style screws the rules and focuses on authenticity and truth. Because dating isn’t a game’s a strategy. One that requires Communication, which allows for Clarity, creates Confident Vulnerability and therefore brings on Attraction. Laurel has given her guidance to over 500 TV, Magazine, Newspaper, and Online media outlets including being a dating coach on E!’s & ‘Famously Single’, as well as on Access Hollywood, ABC’s Nightline, Good Morning America, The Today Show, KTLA Morning News, as well as in Vogue, Washington Post, NY Post, Glamour, Vice, AskMen, Huffington Post, Readers Digest, Shape, etc.

Disclaimer: The informational content on The Minds Journal have been created and reviewed by qualified mental health professionals. They are intended solely for educational and self-awareness purposes and should not be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are experiencing emotional distress or have concerns about your mental health, please seek help from a licensed mental health professional or healthcare provider.

Leave a Comment

Today's Horoscope

Latest Quizzes

Music Taste Quiz: Find Out Your Strongest Personality Trait

Music Taste Quiz: The Music You Like Can Reveal Your Strongest Personality Trait!

Whether you’re the life of the party with a pop playlist, or a deep thinker grooving to jazz, your choice in music can say a lot about who you are.

Latest Quotes

Weekly Horoscope 23 June To 29 June part one

Weekly Horoscope 23 June To 29 June

Weekly Horoscope 23 June To 29 June Aries (March 21 – April 19)Tangible progress on home & wellness goals. A heartfelt reset in family matters or living arrangements. An unexpected insight around 27th may reshape how you handle emotional security or finances. Taurus (April 20 – May 20)This is the week to act on long-held…

Readers Blog

Caption This Image and Selected Wisepicks – 22 June 2025

Ready to unleash your inner wordsmith? ✨??☺️ Now’s your chance to show off your wit, charm, or sheer genius in just one line! Whether it’s laugh-out-loud funny or surprisingly deep, we want to hear it. Submit your funniest, wittiest, or most thought-provoking caption in the comments. We’ll pick 15+ winners to be featured on our…

Latest Articles

The Friend Zone is a place we all have dreaded to visit, but you could accidentally land up just there.




You try to play it cool on the first few dates because you don’t want to be deemed “needy”, “high maintenance”, “aggressive”, or “desperate”.

You make a point of highlighting your common interests. You both like football, you both like the art fair on Sundays, you are both foodies so you stay on that common ground of topics because they are safe and surface and fun and easy to talk about.



At the end of the date, you go “Dutch”, hug, say goodbye, and you feel like you had a pretty great date. And it was a great time…for friends.

Where is the romance? What happened to the wooing?

Beware: you very well could be on the brink of falling into the friend zone!




Knowing how to get out of the friend zone is all about setting the precedent from the onset.

Here are the 6 mistakes, each of which could land you in the friend zone:

1. You went “Dutch”.

Do you want a friend, a colleague, a business partner or do you want a relationship partner?

He is paying for dinner. Paying = providing (masculine). Cooking/gifting = nurturing (feminine). We will go more into this (plus alternative ways that the woman can “pay”) in a future article.

Related: Friend To Boyfriend: 4 Key Tips To Get Out of The Friend Zone

2. You talk about fun and surface topics.

If you eventually want the clothes to come off, you’ve got to dig beyond the exterior by being real and getting raw. That’s how you stand out and create a heart connection.




3. You forgot to flirt!

It’s about the little things — the side glance, the “secret smile”, the little touches, and the flirtatious and slightly (but not overtly) sexy comments.

4. You act like a buddy.

Hanging out at sports bars, not putting effort into how you look, going Dutch; these are all symptoms of friendships. It’s OK to share the same interests.

Women, it’s OK if you are a huge sports fan. But remember that you are looking for a boyfriend, not a buddy. You can still be sexy and cheer on your favorite team.

5. You think you’re being sarcastic, but you’re actually being a bitch or a jerk.

I know you want to be witty and always have a comeback, and I agree! That banter can be extremely sexy and can be a great technique when it comes to flirting.

But there is a difference between sarcastic and being bitchy or a jerk, and it’s too often confusing. Take the edge off. Imagine that they said to you what you said to them.

How does it sound?

Related: 8 Ways A Guy Acts Around You When He Likes You And What It Means

6. You’re easy-going…too easy-going.

You don’t require dates. You just kind of “hang out”. You’re missing the chase and moving right into what you consider to be “relationship mode”. But you’re wrong. You’ve been friend-zoned.




Honestly, a lot of it is about gender roles. Be feminine. Be masculine. Be in your gender power!

The more feminine you are, the more masculine he feels. The more masculine you are, the more feminine she feels.

Stop being androgynous. I know. it’s a modern world. But you have more power in your gender role than you ever allowed yourself to embrace.


Written by Laurel House
Originally appeared on Yourtango
6 Mistakes You Make That Land You In The Friend Zone pin
mistakes friend zone
6 Mistakes Land You Friend Zone Pin


Published On:

Last updated on:

Laurel House

Laurel House is a published author, International Celebrity Dating, Relationship, Empowerment, and Performance Coach, expert for Match.com, and host of ‘The Man Whisperer’ podcast. She is direct, focused, passionate, strong, and feminine. Her no-games style screws the rules and focuses on authenticity and truth. Because dating isn’t a game’s a strategy. One that requires Communication, which allows for Clarity, creates Confident Vulnerability and therefore brings on Attraction. Laurel has given her guidance to over 500 TV, Magazine, Newspaper, and Online media outlets including being a dating coach on E!’s & ‘Famously Single’, as well as on Access Hollywood, ABC’s Nightline, Good Morning America, The Today Show, KTLA Morning News, as well as in Vogue, Washington Post, NY Post, Glamour, Vice, AskMen, Huffington Post, Readers Digest, Shape, etc.

Leave a Comment

    Leave a Comment