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Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

We’re sure that the 5 love languages and their significance are not news to you, but do you know how the love languages of narcissists and empaths differ from each other?

Gary Chapman, in his book “The Five Love Languages: How To Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate”, brought forth the concept of the “Love Language”. According to his theory, these 5 love languages outline how we experience and express love in romantic relationships.

These 5 Love Languages are:

  • Gifts: giving and receiving them
  • Quality Time: shared time with your partner
  • Words Of Affirmations: statements like “I love you” or “You matter to me”
  • Acts of service: doing something for your significant other
  • Physical touch: physical closeness or intimacy
The love languages of narcissists and empaths are different from one another.
Love languages of narcissists and empaths

According to the tenets of the five love languages, people in romantic relationships, tend to give love or show affection in the same way they would prefer to receive love.

For example, if someone’s favored love language is Gifts, then not only they would love to receive gifts, but also they would naturally shower their love interest with many thoughtful presents.

So, to have better communication and a healthy fulfilling relationship, partners must do the following:

  • Discover their significant other’s love language
  • Observe how their partners express love, what they complain about the most, and what their partners request from them the most.
  • Show care in the love language that the recipient partner understands and prefers

Sounds like a cheat code for a perfect relationship, yes? But, what if it’s an empath and narcissist relationship?

Read: Conversational Narcissist

Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

Empaths and narcissists are infamous for getting enmeshed in toxic and dysfunctional relationships. These two personality types are polar opposites and have nothing in common, making their relationships doomed from the get-go.

Although empath and narcissist relationships are plagued with challenges, be it emotional, mental, or physical, these two have an undeniable magnetic attraction toward each other, which normally ends with either the empathic partner getting drained out and walking away or being replaced by someone new.

The 5 Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths
The love languages of narcissists and empaths differ

But what makes an empath get drawn to a narcissistic personality in the first place and what motivates them to stick it through all the abuse and trauma that are often unleashed by the narcissist? The answer is love language manipulation!

Yes, the five love languages that help healthy couples to strengthen their bond, can be used by a narcissist to manipulate their partner, and if that partner happens to be an empath, it’s a field day for the narc.

To better understand the love language abuse done by narcissists, let’s break down the 5 love languages one by one, and have a look at how the love languages of narcissists and empaths differ from each other.

5 Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

Empaths and narcissists have their own version of the 5 love languages and this disparity in the love languages of empaths and narcissists gives way to a highly unbalanced paradigm. 

1. Gifts: The Differing Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths gift
The 5 Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

Narcissist

Presents are tools for the narcissists that they use to reap profits. Surely, they like flashy and expensive gifts for themselves, but when it comes to offering a present to their loved ones, a narc would select a gift with the sole intention of getting an upper hand over their partner.

The partner should be floored, forever indebted, and grateful to the narcissist.

Empath

Empaths appreciate the thought that goes behind a gift and they love to shower their partners with thoughtful presents. It’s their authentic way of showing their love and affection.

They can bend backward to gift their narcissistic partner all sorts of expensive stuff, just to make them happy, and a manipulative narc will egg them on.

2. Quality Time: The Differing Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths time
The 5 Love Languages Of Narcissists And Empaths

Narcissist

People with a Narcissist Personality Disorder are by nature self-absorbed and conceited. They think that they should always get their partner’s undivided focus and attention.

To ensure this, they even can go to the extent of alienating their partners from their friends, family, and every other support system. However, they would never offer to do the same when their turn comes.

Empath

Spending quality time with their partner means a lot to empaths. They seek meaningful conversations and shared experiences as means to be more emotionally invested in their relationship.

When forced by a narcissistic partner to spend more time with them, empaths easily confuse it with love. As a result, they keep devoting all their time and energy to the narcissist and get nothing in return.

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Rose Burke

Hi everyone! I am a wandering soul trying to find my way in this matrix. I am into literature, movies, psychology, occult, tarot, mysticism, and all that jazz. I am an ambivert, love traveling and making new friends, yet very selective about who gets access into my energy bubble. Love pets, foods, rainy days, ghost stories, chocolate, and cancelled plans. Live and let live is my motto.View Author posts