5 Deep Questions To Ask Yourself To Find Your Soulmate

Author : Kelly Ann Garnett, MA

Everyone in this world wants to meet their soulmate and live happily ever after. Some might admit this, and some might not, but the truth remains the same. But before you try to find your soulmate, you need to ask yourself a few questions, as these questions can help you understand and know yourself better, which will in turn help you find the right person.

The real reason youโ€™re still single.

Dating can be a lot of fun for many women, but when youโ€™re ready to learn how to find your soulmate and fall in love, meeting guy after guy doesnโ€™t have quite the same appeal.

If youโ€™ve been looking for true love and not having any luck, there are some deep questions to ask yourself that can help you evaluate what you want in a soul-connected relationship with โ€˜the oneโ€™ โ€” and why you havenโ€™t found him yet.

As the author, speaker, and New Age thought leader, Deepak Chopra, says, โ€œThe more you know yourself, the more you can manifest,โ€ which is why looking inward is the first step toward manifesting your soulmate.

These 5 deep questions to ask yourself will reveal how to find your soulmate and why you havenโ€™t met him โ€ฆ yet.

1. Do you even want to find your soulmate relationship right now? 

Are you seeking a relationship because itโ€™s true what you desire or because itโ€™s what society says you should have? Do you feel left out because your friends are all married and having children and youโ€™re still alone? Are you still recovering from a breakup?

Or, are you really enjoying your freedom and having a blast meeting and dating different people?

Itโ€™s important to be clear about what you truly desire, it matters what you are desiring when it comes to having a relationship.

Knowing what you truly want allows you to communicate that when youโ€™re meeting new people or dating online. Just make sure to honor what it is you want, especially if you want to find your soulmate.

Related: 11 Soulmate Signs Heโ€™s Not The One (and how to find the one for real)

2. Do you judge yourself?

When you judge someone, you are not loving them. The opposite of love is not hate; it is judgment. Hatred comes from judgment. You canโ€™t love someone and judge them at the same time โ€” and this goes for how you view yourself, too.

How much judgment do you have about yourself and men? Do you have any judgments about your body or looks? Your job? Your level of intelligence? What about any judgments about the kind of wife youโ€™ll be? Do you judge yourself for not having found your soulmate yet? Write them all down. 

What are some of the judgments that you have about men? Write them down, too. Are they too scary? Do they always leave? Are they too powerful? Do you think all the good ones are already taken?

When you become aware of the judgments that you have about yourself or men, you can acknowledge that they are just judgments and you can replace them with truth statements. For example, if youโ€™re judging your body, the truth statement you can replace it with is, โ€œI know that my soulmate loves and adores my body exactly as it is.โ€

Keep reciting your truth statements every time you catch yourself in a moment of judgment.

Want to know more about the questions you should ask yourself to find your soulmate? Check this video out below:

3. Do you show men your true self?

When dating or in a relationship, youโ€™re encouraged to just be yourself. Yet, how many people truly are themselves in their relationships?

Have you ever been aware of separating parts of yourself to be in a relationship? I have. Iโ€™ve cut off and sacrificed, parts of my values, my beliefs, and my body (not literally, of course) to be in a relationship with a man who I thought was my soulmate.

I even cut off my own happiness, in order to make him happy.

As women, we come from a long line of โ€˜people pleasersโ€™ who have traditionally been taught to sacrifice their wants and needs for their husbandโ€™s and familyโ€™s wants and needs.

What would it be like to be in a soulmate relationship where you donโ€™t have to separate from yourself to be with another? When you become aware of the ways that youโ€™ve been separating from yourself, you can make a different choice.

It may not shift overnight. But the more times you catch yourself, the more times youโ€™ll make a different choice โ€” and the easier it will become.

Related: 6 Things That Happen When You Have To Let Go Of Your Soulmate

4. Do you know the difference between being โ€˜in loveโ€™ and โ€˜lovingโ€™?

Love is our natural, authentic state of being. However, when you decide that you are in love with someone, you often have expectations of them to meet your needs.

If youโ€™re in love with someone and theyโ€™re in love with you too, then youโ€™ve obtained your goal of falling in love. But the love you have is already within you, so you canโ€™t get it from anyone else anyway โ€” even your soulmate. It just gets activated by others.

Loving, on the other hand, is an ongoing action and a state of gratitude. Loving allows for awareness, joy, and possibility.

When you are loving your partner, you are consciously choosing to show them the love you have, that you care for them, and that youโ€™re willing to nurture them and the relationship.

5. Do you have a wall up to protect yourself?

So many people have underlying feelings of conflict towards the opposite sex that keep them from finding their soulmate.

Some women feel that they are in constant competition to prove that theyโ€™re just as good, if not better than their male counterparts. Others feel that they are helpless or dependent when it comes to men. They may feel that they need to exert power around men or control their men.

If you experience any of these feelings, you are not allowing for a true, authentic soul-level connection to develop. You have a wall of protection up that doesnโ€™t allow for a man to truly get close to you or to get to know the real you. You are not available to truly receive from them.

Everyone tends to put walls up as a way to โ€œprotect themselvesโ€. But when your walls are up, youโ€™re not authentically available to your soulmate. Youโ€™re busy hiding behind the fear, doubt, or worry that is keeping you separate from another. You see men as a threat or yourself as weak.

In order to shift this, you need to see them as equals. They might be bigger and stronger, but they are still just humans who want and need to be loved, appreciated, and respected.

Related: If They Are Failing To Feed Your Soul In These 6 Ways They Arenโ€™t Your Soulmate

The more self-aware you become โ€” and truly show up in the world as your whole self โ€” the more magnetic youโ€™ll be, especially to your soulmate.

You have everything you need in order to find your soulmate. Be grateful for where you are in your life now. Your soulmate will come as soon as youโ€™re truly ready for him.

I am an internationally-known dating coach, professional speaker, workshop leader, and author of The One Simple Secret to Attracting Your Soulmate Now. To learn more about becoming un-single, or for a free Become Your Soulmateโ€™s Soulmate Strategy Session, click here.


Written by Kelly Ann Garnett
Originally published on KellyAnnGarnett.com
Questions To Find Your Soulmate

Published On:

Last updated on:

Kelly Ann Garnett, MA

For over a decade, Kelly has been coaching men and women who are looking for love. She understands the deep desire and longing for a Soulmate and what it takes to stay loyal to yourself as you journey toward each other.Kelly is dedicated to helping her clients embrace love again, empowering them with tools to create a powerful and loving relationship with themselves and others.

Disclaimer: The informational content on The Minds Journal have been created and reviewed by qualified mental health professionals. They are intended solely for educational and self-awareness purposes and should not be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are experiencing emotional distress or have concerns about your mental health, please seek help from a licensed mental health professional or healthcare provider.

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Everyone in this world wants to meet their soulmate and live happily ever after. Some might admit this, and some might not, but the truth remains the same. But before you try to find your soulmate, you need to ask yourself a few questions, as these questions can help you understand and know yourself better, which will in turn help you find the right person.

The real reason youโ€™re still single.

Dating can be a lot of fun for many women, but when youโ€™re ready to learn how to find your soulmate and fall in love, meeting guy after guy doesnโ€™t have quite the same appeal.

If youโ€™ve been looking for true love and not having any luck, there are some deep questions to ask yourself that can help you evaluate what you want in a soul-connected relationship with โ€˜the oneโ€™ โ€” and why you havenโ€™t found him yet.

As the author, speaker, and New Age thought leader, Deepak Chopra, says, โ€œThe more you know yourself, the more you can manifest,โ€ which is why looking inward is the first step toward manifesting your soulmate.

These 5 deep questions to ask yourself will reveal how to find your soulmate and why you havenโ€™t met him โ€ฆ yet.

1. Do you even want to find your soulmate relationship right now? 

Are you seeking a relationship because itโ€™s true what you desire or because itโ€™s what society says you should have? Do you feel left out because your friends are all married and having children and youโ€™re still alone? Are you still recovering from a breakup?

Or, are you really enjoying your freedom and having a blast meeting and dating different people?

Itโ€™s important to be clear about what you truly desire, it matters what you are desiring when it comes to having a relationship.

Knowing what you truly want allows you to communicate that when youโ€™re meeting new people or dating online. Just make sure to honor what it is you want, especially if you want to find your soulmate.

Related: 11 Soulmate Signs Heโ€™s Not The One (and how to find the one for real)

2. Do you judge yourself?

When you judge someone, you are not loving them. The opposite of love is not hate; it is judgment. Hatred comes from judgment. You canโ€™t love someone and judge them at the same time โ€” and this goes for how you view yourself, too.

How much judgment do you have about yourself and men? Do you have any judgments about your body or looks? Your job? Your level of intelligence? What about any judgments about the kind of wife youโ€™ll be? Do you judge yourself for not having found your soulmate yet? Write them all down. 

What are some of the judgments that you have about men? Write them down, too. Are they too scary? Do they always leave? Are they too powerful? Do you think all the good ones are already taken?

When you become aware of the judgments that you have about yourself or men, you can acknowledge that they are just judgments and you can replace them with truth statements. For example, if youโ€™re judging your body, the truth statement you can replace it with is, โ€œI know that my soulmate loves and adores my body exactly as it is.โ€

Keep reciting your truth statements every time you catch yourself in a moment of judgment.

Want to know more about the questions you should ask yourself to find your soulmate? Check this video out below:

3. Do you show men your true self?

When dating or in a relationship, youโ€™re encouraged to just be yourself. Yet, how many people truly are themselves in their relationships?

Have you ever been aware of separating parts of yourself to be in a relationship? I have. Iโ€™ve cut off and sacrificed, parts of my values, my beliefs, and my body (not literally, of course) to be in a relationship with a man who I thought was my soulmate.

I even cut off my own happiness, in order to make him happy.

As women, we come from a long line of โ€˜people pleasersโ€™ who have traditionally been taught to sacrifice their wants and needs for their husbandโ€™s and familyโ€™s wants and needs.

What would it be like to be in a soulmate relationship where you donโ€™t have to separate from yourself to be with another? When you become aware of the ways that youโ€™ve been separating from yourself, you can make a different choice.

It may not shift overnight. But the more times you catch yourself, the more times youโ€™ll make a different choice โ€” and the easier it will become.

Related: 6 Things That Happen When You Have To Let Go Of Your Soulmate

4. Do you know the difference between being โ€˜in loveโ€™ and โ€˜lovingโ€™?

Love is our natural, authentic state of being. However, when you decide that you are in love with someone, you often have expectations of them to meet your needs.

If youโ€™re in love with someone and theyโ€™re in love with you too, then youโ€™ve obtained your goal of falling in love. But the love you have is already within you, so you canโ€™t get it from anyone else anyway โ€” even your soulmate. It just gets activated by others.

Loving, on the other hand, is an ongoing action and a state of gratitude. Loving allows for awareness, joy, and possibility.

When you are loving your partner, you are consciously choosing to show them the love you have, that you care for them, and that youโ€™re willing to nurture them and the relationship.

5. Do you have a wall up to protect yourself?

So many people have underlying feelings of conflict towards the opposite sex that keep them from finding their soulmate.

Some women feel that they are in constant competition to prove that theyโ€™re just as good, if not better than their male counterparts. Others feel that they are helpless or dependent when it comes to men. They may feel that they need to exert power around men or control their men.

If you experience any of these feelings, you are not allowing for a true, authentic soul-level connection to develop. You have a wall of protection up that doesnโ€™t allow for a man to truly get close to you or to get to know the real you. You are not available to truly receive from them.

Everyone tends to put walls up as a way to โ€œprotect themselvesโ€. But when your walls are up, youโ€™re not authentically available to your soulmate. Youโ€™re busy hiding behind the fear, doubt, or worry that is keeping you separate from another. You see men as a threat or yourself as weak.

In order to shift this, you need to see them as equals. They might be bigger and stronger, but they are still just humans who want and need to be loved, appreciated, and respected.

Related: If They Are Failing To Feed Your Soul In These 6 Ways They Arenโ€™t Your Soulmate

The more self-aware you become โ€” and truly show up in the world as your whole self โ€” the more magnetic youโ€™ll be, especially to your soulmate.

You have everything you need in order to find your soulmate. Be grateful for where you are in your life now. Your soulmate will come as soon as youโ€™re truly ready for him.

I am an internationally-known dating coach, professional speaker, workshop leader, and author of The One Simple Secret to Attracting Your Soulmate Now. To learn more about becoming un-single, or for a free Become Your Soulmateโ€™s Soulmate Strategy Session, click here.


Written by Kelly Ann Garnett
Originally published on KellyAnnGarnett.com
Questions To Find Your Soulmate

Published On:

Last updated on:

Kelly Ann Garnett, MA

For over a decade, Kelly has been coaching men and women who are looking for love. She understands the deep desire and longing for a Soulmate and what it takes to stay loyal to yourself as you journey toward each other.Kelly is dedicated to helping her clients embrace love again, empowering them with tools to create a powerful and loving relationship with themselves and others.

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