Love is in the air, but can you handle it? Are you really, truly, and genuinely ready to fall in love and be in a serious and committed relationship?
There comes a time in life when you’ve been casually dating for long enough that you ask yourself, “Will I ever find love? And even if I do, am I ready for a relationship?”
Some people believe that falling in love with someone is a thing that just happens and that none of us can control when or how that comes to be.
That may be true to a degree, but there are telltale signs you can look for in order to find more certainty about whether you are or aren’t truly ready not only to find love but to commit to being in a healthy relationship.
Here are three ways to know if you are ready for a relationship and it’s time to fall in love with someone.
1. Your personal chemistry is ready.
Falling in love takes chemistry. But sometimes, your chemistry just isn’t right.
I’m talking about your own personal chemistry.
Maybe you still have feelings for an old lover and your chemistry is still connected to them.
When your chemistry is ready for a new love, you will no longer feel bonded to an ex. Your chemistry will literally change. Instead of being oxytocin-bonded to your former flame and what you had with them, you’ll now be ready for the dopamine high of new love again.
Thank God! Because sometimes the process of moving forward can be a rough ride.
2. Your understanding of compatibility is ready.
The great thing about being ready to fall in love is that you’ve started to understand what it is you’re looking for.
You also start to have a greater appreciation for what compatibility really means.
You will know your understanding of compatibility is ready when you start looking for someone who actually fits your life.
No more square pegs and round holes. You are now being discerning as to how, when, where and why you fall in love, and you’re ready to make sure it works for you.
You recognize that in any healthy relationship you’re going to get some of what you want and some of what you don’t want. If you’re okay with that, your understanding of compatibility is realistic and you’re ready to be in love.
3. Your level of commitment is ready.
Being ready to be in a relationship and fall in love is a commitment you make to yourself first.
This means you set a standard for yourself that shows up in your willingness to only be with people who can make and keep agreements. It shows itself when you are willing to walk away from bad deals because you are more excited about exploring good ones elsewhere.
Your level of commitment is ready when your integrity is on point, you have a clear understanding of what you want (and what you don’t want), and you’re willing to negotiate with someone who also knows what they want (and what they don’t want).
When your personal chemistry is ready, it feels like you are in springtime. You can’t wait to explore your future.
When your understanding of compatibility is ready, pieces start falling easily into place because you know what fits for you.
When your commitment to yourself is on point, falling in love becomes your view as an exciting adventure.
Remember that people who know how to love and be loved are capable of making and keeping agreements.
People who are compatible with you will negotiate with you.
Falling in love starts with your commitment to yourself.
When this is on point, you’re ready for a relationship — and it’s time to fall in love.
Written by James Allen Hanrahan Originally appeared in Yourtango