Do you tend to gravitate to people who’re emotionally unavailable or complicated? It’s not only you, there’re so many of us who love difficult partners; but the question remains…why?
There is one saying according to which there is no nation without shed blood and no love without shed tears. Some analyses use to insist on the fact that healthy relationships should be harmonious and creative. Still, passionate affairs are always the opposite. They seem to be so counterproductive, and full of conflicts and disputes. And they oscillate between hate and love.
This can be exhaustive, but it is still typical. Surely, if you have to deal with a systematically abusive or conspicuously aggressive partner, you immediately have to consult a psychologist so that you release yourself from a toxic and harmful relationship. Yet, along general lines, a love affair without tensions is generally considered tedious and without challenge.
Why is it so? A usual explanation is that we are intrigued by the challenge of conquering another person. Any difficulty increases the fascination with the love game.
Yet, a complex relationship with what appears to be full of unsurmountable obstacles could be something more than that. Interestingly, strong people tend to attract hard and turmoiled affairs.
Why We Love Difficult Partners?
There may be a spiritual background for our proclivity towards hard love affairs. The explanations include the ones below.
1. Difficult Partners Mirror Our Personality
The opposites attract each other but, often, beyond a superficial controversy, there may exist an underlying similarity. This can be a positive factor for an erotic liaison. Still, in some cases, it can be annoying, since it brings us in front of our own weaknesses and flaws.
Two egoists or unreliable partners will have a hard time loving each other. Once realized, one should regard the relationship as a chance to confront their own dark sides and surpass the same. See a difficult partner that you really love as a gift of the universe and work together to overcome your flaws.
Read: What Is Spirituality?
2. A Karmic Lesson
Some Karmic relationships cause us wounds from which however we want to sustain and go through. What seems a “masochistic capriccio” is sometimes a destiny for cleaning our Karma.
Two persons may come together because their love is a reincarnated one and their souls meet again to solve their issues. Or, there is a psychic bond that brings two people into a love affair and their encounter is a lesson for both that will eventually lead to their self-improvement and a deeper connection. This may not be obvious at the beginning, but gradually the tension will lead to the development of both parties.
Read: He Won’t Leave His Wife But Won’t Let Me Go
3. Antithesis & Synthesis
The German Philosopher Hegel referred to a creative “dialectic”, which means a meeting of arguments. In the first stage, the two theories or ideologies (or nations and classes) clash against each other, in peace or in war. But, through this conflict, this antithesis, something new will emerge that combines elements of both previous tendencies.
This will be a synthesis. This can also happen with a couple. Two totally distinct characters will confront each other initially. Nevertheless, passionate love can be like a stage of the war. And as the Ancient Greek Philosopher, Heraclitus wrote: “War is the Father of Everything”.
Love is beside a battlefield, right?
So, unless you are really the object of an affair that is obviously unbalanced, miserable, or toxic, do not hesitate to select a partner that will challenge your intellect and your emotional and spiritual world. And even if a relationship cannot go on, you have been taught a useful lesson for the future.
Post originally appeared on Magical Recipes Online
We hope the above article on why we choose difficult partners was insightful. Why do you think we tend to choose difficult and complicated partners? Share your views on why we pick difficult partners by commenting down below!
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