Announces your relationship by
ARIES: Posting a carousel of pictures they took of you in bed with the caption (ring emoji)
TAURUS: Carving your initials into a tree
GEMINI: Casually referring to you by your first initial in their newsletter
CANCER: Inviting you to a dinner with their parents
LEO: Commissioning an oil portrait of yours
VIRGO: Subtly slipping your name into a vent session
LIBRA: Taking you to a party in coordinating outfits
Why they got rejected
ARIES: Made out with someone else to make their crush jealous.
TAURUS: Crush saw their notes app note full of baby names for their future children.
GEMINI: Shared too much niche serial killer knowledge.
CANCER: Their type is "emotionally unavailable".
LEO: Asked their crush to delete their ex's number on the first date.
VIRGO: Kept psychoanalyzing their ex.
LIBRA: Flaked too many times.
SCORPIO: Ignored their crush at the party a
Types of friends …
ARIES: Offers to fight your ex even though you insist you're still friends.
TAURUS: Really good at giving hugs, even though their advice is questionable.
GEMINI: Always name-drops their other "friends" who you've never met.
CANCER: Expects you to read their mind and resents you when you don't.
LEO: Is a little too eager to validate all your questionable decisions.
VIRGO: They're not judging you, but they're judging you.
LIBRA: Cancels plans with
ARIES: Said the first thing that popped into their head instead of what they actually meant.
TAURUS: They didn't miscommunicate; you just misunderstood.
GEMINI: Changed their opinion completely since the last time you talked2 hours ago.
CANCER: Expects you to intuit what's wrong based on how heavily they're sighing.
LEO: Sings "Cool" by Gwen Stefani at karaoke with multiple exes present.
VIRGO: Thought they told you the plan, but it was just a stressful dream.
Leo, Libra, Aquarius, Gemini:
Mastering one subject
Knowing small amounts of infoabout any and all subjects because our curious brain can't just focus on one thing
Signs as pickup lines
ARIES: "Is it hot in here, or is it just us?"
TAURUS: "Wanna know what this shirt is made of? Relationship material!"
GEMINI: "I've got A, E, and O—all I need is U and I ;)"
CANCER: "Do you have an extra heart? Mine was just stolen :P"
LEO: "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"
VIRGO: "Are you a parking ticket? Because you've got 'fine' written all over you!"
LIBRA: "I must be in a museum because you'r
Proud of their
ARIES: Arsenal of comebacks
GEMINI: Flawless pronunciation while placing their order at a French restaurant
LEO: "Altruistic" deeds
VIRGO: Performance in their role as the (strict) mom friend
LIBRA: No makeup makeup look
SCORPIO: Internet sleuthing skills
CAPRICORN: Standardized test scores from high school