Get Unmatched: 7 Common Online Dating Scams And How To Stay Safe

You know that there’s something seriously wrong with the world when love becomes the most exploited thing and a bait to lure you into financial or emotional ruin. Welcome to the world of online dating scams, where nothing is what it seems!

Dating apps were a godsend for people looking for love and companionship, but couldn’t meet people in regular ways.

Being introvert or socially awkward, working odd hours, or living in a not-so-happening part of town – there could be many reasons, but the fact remains a lot of people turn to dating apps in their quest for a relationship.

And dating apps can be a lot of fun and surely seems to be a convenient way to meet potential partners, especially people whom you would not cross paths with in real life.

However, online matchmaking nowadays comes with an unmatched peril in the name of romance scam.

Dating in itself makes you vulnerable. You’re opening up to a new person and letting them in your world. Dating with strangers from behind a screen just amplifies the risk factor a million times.

Why It’s Important to Stay Safe Online

Romance cons are not a new thing. They have been around for a long time – maybe as long as romance itself. However, earlier, when you met a person face to face and dealt with them in person, it was not easy to put on a charade for long.

And saving the ones who were too naive or too blinded by the sudden rush of a prospective relationship (no judgment here, we all have been in sticky situations sometime), many could see through the deceit, so the problem was not that widespread or severe.

But online dating gets you exposed to people from all over the world, of unique beliefs, and from diverse cultural, financial, and racial backgrounds – which can be a wonderful thing, but also has its pitfalls.

And if recent case studies are to be believed, online dating is showing more dangers than benefits with the rise of online dating scams like Catfishing!

You might believe love has no boundaries, but neither do scammers on dating sites. Dating scams have evolved into many deceitful forms, all designed to exploit your emotions, trust, and eagerness to find a meaningful connection, mainly for financial gains, and sometimes for cheap thrills.

And with the advent of AI and Deepfake, videos and pictures, even Facetime can mislead you very easily.

From concocted stories to stolen identities, from fake videos to emotional blackmail, unsuspecting victims are lured into an illusion of fake togetherness and shared future, where their feelings are manipulated and they’re left broke or broken-hearted, and sometimes both.

People who are lonely, struggling with grief or bereavement, or dealing with trauma from childhood are more prone to fall for these online dating scams. But it can happen to anybody.

Read: 10 Signs Of Childhood Trauma: You Had An Unhappy Childhood And The Realization Is Setting In Now!

Many of the leading online dating sites have strengthened their safety and privacy features, but you too can practice online safety from your end by being aware of the prevailing internet dating scams and learning to identify the red flags of online dating.

Before going into how to stay safe online, let’s check out the most common cases of dating fraud.

7 Online Dating Scams

Here’re the most common romance scams that happen online:

1. Sextortion: Paying Too High a Price

This might be the oldest form of romance con, taking a more pernicious digital look. Flirtatious chatting quickly escalates into requests for intimate photos or videos.

Once you share a sensitive content with them, their flattery turns into threats of leaking the same, unless you send money or agree to their other detestable demands.

You find yourself in a spiral of shame, scared for your public image and reputation, isolated, but still apprehensive of reporting due to fear of embarrassment.

2. Catfishing: Falling for a Ghost

Catfishing means making someone fall for a fake identity for financial, emotional, or psychological gains.

Catfishing scammers steal photos, videos, and information, mainly from the social media profiles of individuals who look desirable and attractive.

Then they create a fake personality to hook innocent victims looking for a partner on dating sites. These scammers invent elaborate backstories and engage in prolonged conversations to build up a rapport.

Red Flags To Watch Out For:

• The “relationship” moves awfully fast
• Age is never a factor (many middle aged people are conned by using photos of younger looking people)
• Overly dramatic or unrealistically unfortunate incidents happen with them soon
• They cannot meet in person or even video call
• Their social media presence is oddly limited or newly created
• They need money, but mostly in Gift Cards or Crypto currency (it’s untraceable)
• Sometimes they ask you to receive money from unknown people, making you a money mule, and getting you involved in money laundering (serious federal crime)
  

Most of the time, these elaborate hoaxes are designed for monetary favors, and in such cases, the Catfishing scammers often “run into” bad luck, like their bank account gets frozen, they get stranded in a foreign land without necessary resources, or they meet with an accident.

They ask you for the money, promising to pay you back when they get back home or on their feet (sometimes quite literally) and they hang that like a dangling carrot in front of you. This farce goes on till you keep buying their BS and sending them funds.

Check this video for more information on Catfishing:

In many recent cases, it has been observed that Catfishing scammers are not always motivated by money.

Many have fallen victim to such online romance cons by people who know them personally – friends, cousins, etc. – who duped them just to get a kick out of it, or for attention, or to settle scores of some kind. Petty? Maybe, or maybe we need a new word for it.

A real life case on such a Catfishing romance scam is shown in the below video:

It goes without saying, when victims of Catfishing discover the person they had given their heart to does not exist, they’re left devastated – physically, emotionally, psychologically, and financially.

The following types of romance frauds are more evolved forms of Catfishing. Let’s keep reading.

3. Army Romance Scams: Not a Tale of Gallantry

A scammer on dating sites sometimes can impersonate US Military or Navy personnel by stealing their photos and other information.

They claim to be soldiers deployed overseas and strike up a romantic relationship with their victim. The uniform does half the work, winning trust and admiration.

Their narratives usually include the following claims:

• They can’t access their bank account while deployed.

• They need money for emergency leave, medical expenses, or to ship belongings.

• They plan to settle down with you once they’re “home.”
  

Reality Check: Real military people will never have to ask for money from strangers online. They are well taken care of.

4. Oil Rig Romance Scam: The Deep Sea of Deception

Scammers pose as oil rig engineers or workers stuck offshore with no internet access except via email or messaging apps. They claim to be widowed, lonely, and eager to build a future with you.

Their common manipulation tactics include:

• They’re working in remote or “high-risk” zones.

• Their equipment is damaged and needs funds.

• They’ve suddenly run into legal trouble in a foreign country.
  

The isolation narrative makes it harder for victims to verify the truth.

5. Gift Scam: “I’m Sending You Something Special”… But It’s a Trap

In this type of relationship scams, fraudsters pretend to send expensive gifts (like jewelry, laptops, perfumes, or cash) to gain your trust and affection.

But shortly after, you’re told the package is “stuck in customs” or “held by a courier company”, and you need to pay a fee (delivery charges, taxes, insurance) to release it.

The scammer may pose as:

• A wealthy overseas admirer

• A soldier sending home belongings

• A businessperson “investing in your love”

• Or even a supposed celebrity gifting their biggest fan.
  

Receiving a gift feels thrilling—it creates emotional attachment. You feel obligated to pay the small “fee” because they were “so generous”. They often say “we’ll be together soon” to keep the fantasy going. So, you ignore the following red flags:

• They claim they sent you a valuable package without you asking.

• They push you to act fast—“or it’ll be confiscated.”

• They want money sent to a third-party (via Western Union, gift cards, etc.)

• You’re contacted by a fake courier or customs official.
  

Other common versions include:

• Customs Fee Scam: Pay to “release” the package.

• Tax Scam: Told you must pay VAT or import duty.

• Delivery Insurance: Claim they need funds for a courier’s “security fee”.
  

6. Celebrity Romance Scam: When Fame Becomes a Facade

In this romance scam, a fraudster pretends to be a celebrity to lure victims into a romantic or emotional relationship.

They typically use photos, videos, and sometimes even deepfake videos or voice recordings to make it believable.

Think it sounds obvious? Think again. Victims range from teenagers to elderly individuals, often people who are vulnerable, lonely, or simply starstruck.

Check this video below for a shocking real life online dating scam:

How the Scam Unfolds:

• DM Slide or Friend Request:

“Hi beautiful, I noticed your profile. I don’t usually do this…”

• Private Messaging:

They move the convo to WhatsApp, Signal, or Telegram “for privacy.”

• Love Bombing:

They say they feel a special connection with you. Fast.

The Ask:

• They can’t access their funds and need money for a flight to visit you.

• Their management controls their accounts and they need your help.

• They’re “trapped” in a legal battle and need urgent financial assistance.

• Or…they just want to “send you a gift”—cue the gift scam mentioned earlier.
  

The idea that a celebrity chose you out of millions can be intoxicating.

Victims feel flattered and lucky—making it easier to manipulate them. Scammers use real celebrity content, and fan pages to seem legit. So, you ignore the following red flags:

•  They message you from a private or “secret” account.

•  They avoid video calls or say their camera is broken.

•  They ask you to keep the relationship “private.”

•  They demand money for travel, emergencies, or legal issues.

•  They use excuses like “My manager won’t let me talk to fans publicly.”
  

Verify the celeb’s real social handles. Trust your gut—real celebrities have no reason to slide into DMs for romance.

7. The Gold Bar Scam: When Romance Meets Greed

You’re chatting with someone online—maybe they’re a soldier, diplomat, oil rig worker, or businessperson working abroad. They claim to have access to gold bars either from:

• An inheritance

• A war zone “find”

• A high-value investment

• Or a secret deposit box left by a family member
  

They can’t move it out of the country themselves due to “regulations,” “corruption,” or “military rules.” So guess who they ask to help?  You.

They say they trust you more than anyone. They want to build a future with you, and share the wealth. They’ll say things like:

“I just need you to pay the customs clearance… I’ll give you 50% of the gold’s value.”

“Once it’s in your name, I’ll fly to meet you, and we’ll be rich together.”

Scammers will ask you to cover:

• Custom clearance fees

• Storage fees at a “secure facility”

• Taxes or insurance for the shipment

• Bribes or “handling fees” for officials
  

They often provide fake documents, like:

• Certificates of ownership

• Shipping manifests

• Photos of gold bars with your name

• Emails from fake customs officers or courier services
  

The promise of a better life, especially when combined with love, is powerful. Victims feel they’re helping someone they care about.

They’re told the gold is real—and worth millions. Greed meets trust: a dangerous combo when manipulated. So, the red flags that get ignored are:

• They say they can’t access their own finances.

• They want you to “receive” the shipment.

• They provide poor-quality documents with spelling errors.

• They rush you to send money before a “deadline.”
  

Who Are at Risk of Getting Catfished?

Here’re the people who are most likely to get Catfished.

• People who idealize romance or are in love with falling in love, aka, romantics
• People who have lost their partners, recently
• People who are always anxious or deal with stress or other negative emotions
• People with impulsive tendencies
• People who have codependent tendencies
• People who are desperately looking for love, companionship, or excitement in their life
• Women and middle aged people than people of other gender and age
  

The world is looking grimmer is it? Wait, love is still there, just stay safe from these love scammers. Let us show how!

How To Stay Safe Online

If you’re someone who is vulnerable about love and can’t wait to get swept off your feet, maybe go slow on a budding relationship?

Rushing into a relationship is never a good idea. Other than Catfishing, you can subject yourself to unavailable partners, emotional dependency, risky behavior, poor choices, impulsive decisions, or other relationship problems.

In the early Honeymoon stage of a relationship, our emotions and eagerness can overpower our logic and discretion. So, listen to your heart, but also your mind.

Do not share your social media profiles, phone number, and sensitive information like intimate pictures or financial details before you get to know someone really well and in person. Don’t share your social security number or any other personal information online with strangers.

Take a step back and observe your feelings and reactions objectively. Talk to a close friend and ask for their honest opinion.

Maybe talk to someone who is younger than you (for a fresh perspective) or someone who has a better awareness of technology and its malpractices.

If you make it to the online dating scammer list once, chances are you will be targeted by different fake profiles repeatedly, sometimes by the same scammer – so be on your guards.  

And a good rule of thumb would be to never N E V E R send money to someone you met online and whom you have never met before. Not even if you feel you have known them from a past life!

Read: How Your New Age Beliefs Are Getting You In Toxic Relationships

Some other practical safety tips while dating online:

• Never send money, gift cards, or crypto to someone you haven’t met IRL.

• Be cautious if someone declares love too quickly.

• Do a reverse image search of their profile photos.

• Talk to a trusted friend before making emotional or financial decisions.

• Report suspicious online activity to social media platforms, local cybercrime authorities, and the FTC or Interpol. Report to IC3.gov if you’re in the U.S.

• Be skeptical of “surprise” gifts from online acquaintances.

• Never pay customs or courier fees for someone you haven’t met in person.

• Reverse-search any courier or third-party email address or phone number.

• Block and cut contact if someone pressures you into paying.

• Check for spelling mistakes or inconsistencies in their speech.

• Be skeptical of sudden claims of wealth or inheritance.

• Never agree to receive or “clear” gold or valuables.
  

Follow Your Heart, But Don’t Leave Your Mind Behind

Love is not dead yet and online dating can potentially turn into something meaningful if both parties are honest to each other. Don’t let online dating scams deter you from your search for true love. But at the same time, remember that a relationship should not cost you your sanity and well-being. Stay you – just be more aware and cautious.

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