“Do you worry about the things that happened and can’t be changed, like, a bad first date; and the things that will never happen, like, standing under the mango tree and expect strawberry fruits to fall down? Don’t be so prone to ‘what-ifs’ disease when you can worry about things when it happens.” –Bea C. Pilotin
Are you a Nervous Nelly or a Worrywart? Do you worry about things that are not important? Complaining about tight budget and worry how to pay your bills? Do you complain about difficult subordinates or a tough meeting with your boss? Do you always worry about getting flu and cough because it’s cold season; about meeting work targets; of wearing the wrong outfit; a bad haircut; forgetting to call back your friend; endlessly worrying about your health and forgetting someone’s name; about the things that happened and can’t be changed, like, a bad first date; things that will never happen, like, standing under the mango tree and expect strawberry fruits to fall down? Don’t be so prone to ‘what-ifs’ disease when you can worry about things when it happens.
Stop worrying about simple things then letting that monster keep nagging your thought. Worry is like a thief stealing away your ability to enjoy a happy life, you know that? Don’t worry about tomorrow and instead, hope for a better one. Always remind yourself, what happened yesterday is gone. Focus on the present moment which is a gift; accept uncertainty and try a regular meditation to detach yourself from this feeling. Learn the magic of letting go to avoid incessant fretting, and above all, change your perspective.
Live a life to the fullest and make the best out of it. Meanwhile, let me tell you that the source of genuine happiness is not in worrying whether you are happy or not. The source of genuine happiness lies in knowing that no matter what you were in the past and no matter what you are now, God has in store for you something to be happy about in everything. Life’s one certainty is it’s sheer uncertainty. As the Scripture reminds us, “we do not know what will happen tomorrow.” At times, the fulfillment of our dreams may sometimes turn into nightmares. This reminds us the uncertainty of life, but also of the need to align our desires with God’s will. As they said, write your plans in pencil and give God the eraser. Don’t worry about what lies tomorrow because worrying will just cast a huge shadow behind simple things. It’s totally a waste of time. As what the Author, Victor Hugo said, “Short as life, we make still shorter by careless waste of time.” It’s like, the older we get, the shorter life seems! There’s no sadder example of wasted time than a life dominated by fretting. Take for instance, the story I once heard from my Theology Professor when I was in my College years. There was one American woman whose dream of riding a train through the English Countryside came true. After boarding the train, she kept fretting about windows, worrying about temperature, complaining about her seat assignment, rearranging her luggage and so on. To her surprise, she suddenly reached her journey’s end. With deep regret, she said to the person meeting her, “If I’d known I was going to arrive so soon, I wouldn’t have wasted my time fretting so much.” Well, it’s so easy to get sidetracked by worries that won’t really matter at life’s end- people who are luckier and wealthier than you or an envy stranger who tries to ruin your life every day. Acknowledge the brevity of life. Fretting is hell. Fretting is death. Fretting is wrong. Travel your life’s journey without it.
Speaking of life’s journey, don’t be so afraid to open new doors and don’t be scared about what lies inside when you do. Life is a labyrinth of doors, whenever you open one- an amazing world bare itself with exciting and amazing realities. But, behind these doors, is life full of tricks, and in it, are many twists and turns which can deceive even the genius one. Keep opening a door but you always have to remember that it’s not always the appearance of the door that will speak what’s inside. A house with a golden-carved door might have emptiness inside and a house with an old wooded-door might have warmth and comfort when you open it. We can never discern what is inside when you open one door. You may be worried that when you do, it may lead you to your downfall and sorrow. Well, these realities can’t be avoided! But there will always be that little voice in you which holds the key to the right door- the voice of God that whispers, “My child, don’t worry, just turn the knob and open the door!”
And if one day, you wake up alone and worried, try reading the first stanza of the poem, ‘Love After Love’ one of the eloquent prayers that expresses gratitude, written by the Nobel-Prize winning Poet and Dramatist, Derek Walcott:
“Love After Love”
The time will come,
When, with elation,
You will greet yourself arriving
At your OWN DOOR, in your own mirror,
And each will smile at the other’s welcome.