When it comes to dating, there are certain behaviors and attitudes you should never tolerate, no matter how much you like the guy, and no matter how much you want to be with him.ย ย
In my work as an international love coach, I find that many women, even the high-achieving ones that make up the core of my clientele, lack a basic frame of reference for what is healthy and acceptable from men, and what is unhealthy, toxic, or even dangerous.ย
So today, we are talking about the five behaviors you should not tolerate in dating.
5 Behaviors To Not Tolerate In Dating
Behavior #1 To Not Tolerate In Dating: The Hot & Cold Treatment
This is when a man makes you feel like a queen when you are on a date with him, but when the date is over, he disappears and you hear nothing from him.
A lot of the time, women get caught up in the chemistry that they feel on a date with such a man. What they neglect is how he makes them feel when he is NOT around.
When you go weeks without hearing from a man, how does it really feel?
He makes you feel insecure and like youโre walking on eggshells.
Yet, we women keep chasing that high that we feel with such a man on a rare date, instead of seeing the lack of consistency and effort that he is really showing us.
This is the most common behavior to not tolerate in dating.
Related: 5 Dating Deal Breakers You Should Never Ignore
Diva Tip: You deserve to feel good around a man โ not just when youโre on a date with him, but also when you are not!
This means that a man who is truly into you is going to keep in touch, call and text you and take consistent action to see you more and more often. Heโs not just going to vanish from the face of the Earth.
Donโt tolerate hot and cold behavior.
You deserve much more, and it is available to you.
There are many amazing men out there who know how to make you feel special, not just on a date, but also in-between.
Behavior #2 To Never Tolerate: A Man Who Doesnโt Value Emotional Connection
Yes, every once in a while, youโre going to come across that horny hottie who just wants to get in your pants โ and yes, he may be cracking really good lookingโฆ
However, if youโre looking to build a real relationship, then you need to value emotional connection, and you need to only entertain a man who values emotional connection as well.
In other words, if a man doesnโt give a crap about getting to know you, understanding more about you, being curious about what makes you laugh and what makes you cry and what your biggest fears are and what your biggest dreams areโฆ then heโs not the man you can possibly build a real committed relationship with.
Ignore these men, and say goodbye if you have a man who just values sexual connection and does not value any emotional connection.
Related: 5 Romantic Phrases That Are Major Relationship Red Flags
Behavior #3 To Not Tolerate In Dating: A Controlling Man
A man who tries to control your personal choices is a definite no.
Yes, weโre living in the 21st century and a man doesnโt get to tell you what you should wear, who you should meet, what is the best job for you, or if youโre โallowedโ to work after marriage or not.
A man should have no say on these highly personal choices.
Of course, in a marriage or committed relationship, I do advise women to consult their partners on important life decisions. But that is part of a couple working as a team, and in no way should it be interpreted as the woman becoming subservient to a manโs wishes!
But if early on youโre already seeing this behavior that you should not tolerate in dating, youโre better off without that man.
See this as the huge red flag that it is, and get rid of Mr. Hyper-Controlling before getting entangled with him further.ย ย
Behavior #4 To Never Accept From A Man: Constant Criticism Around Who You Are
If we have had a childhood where we were often criticized by our parents or our primary caregivers and we always had to prove our worth to them, we are likely to attract a romantic partner who acts similarly.
This is the man who is critical about almost everything you do.
Instead of making you feel loved, he is going to constantly criticize you, tell you how you should do everything better, how you should be more social, how youโre too introverted or how youโre too extroverted.
It could go as far as a man criticizing you on how you should brush your hair, how you should ramp up your choice in stockings or even clean your teeth betterโฆ
Very often, women donโt realize how toxic this is, and end up feeling โnot good enough.โ
Iโm here to tell you, this kind of constant criticism is not normal, and itโs something to absolutely not tolerate in dating.
You donโt have to go through this.
You donโt have to accept constant criticism from a man โ especially from a man you are just dating!
You deserve to feel good in love. Not bad, not bullied, not constantly told what is missing or not good enough about you.
Related: Ladies Be Warned, 16 Men Share The Red Flags In A Man You Should Stay Away From
Behavior #5 To Not Tolerate In Dating: Challenging Your Boundaries
You say โnoโ to the second glass of wine, and he pushes you into having it.
If you keep saying โno,โ he shames you for it and tells you youโre โnot fun enough.โ
Or maybe you say, โNo, I donโt want to travel that far to see you,โ and he guilt-trips you into driving two hours to meet him because, otherwise, youโre โnot caring enoughโ or โnot a good person.โ
Or maybe you tell him, โItโs too soon for sex,โ and youโd like to take it slow, and he keeps asking and pushing and tells you youโre โa prudeโ and how this is the most normal way to date.
Watch the signs.
You donโt deserve to be treated this way. Show the door to any man who challenges you in this way repeatedly.
Your boundaries need to be respected. A man whoโs truly into you will be able to handle your boundaries, as well as have healthy boundaries of his own.
In fact, your boundaries are what makes a high-value man feel more attracted to you.ย
The Way Forward
This is a very basic list of the worst behaviors to not tolerate in dating, and just following it will save you from so much heartbreak from men.
Related: 5 Dating Deal-Breakers You Should Never Ignore
Iโm so excited to help you attract your dream love in a healthy, empowered, high-value way!
Check out Sami Wunderโs blog for more such interesting articles on love and relationships.
Written By Sami Wunder Originally Appeared On Sami Wunder's Website
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