We have a lot of advice floating around on how to know if a guy is interested in you or if he is losing interest in you.
But what can you do if he seems to be losing interest in you? Can you regain it back? Should you even try?
It is a paradox but most of the mechanics that you try to regain your lost love interest are actually counterproductive.
Here is a list of six things that you should generally integrate in your life at all times that lead to a happy, healthy and fulfilling life, which is actually a key to attracting fantastic people and relationships into your life.
If a guy seems to be losing interest in you, review this list and see if you are integrating these things in your life or not.
Related: 8 Body Language Signs Your Partner Is Losing Interest In You
6 Steps To Take If He Is Losing Interest In You And Pulling Away
1) Do nothing
This is easier said than done. But it is so worth it!
If he is losing interest in you, know that freaking out never works. Your drama will just repel him further. Just take a step back and reflect. If it feels like he’s losing interest in you, should you pursue him?
You may feel like doing it in your core because it may seem like the only way to catch him
But let me just break it you, it just does not work that way. He is not a prey, so don’t try to be a hunter! If he loves you he has to come to you out of his own free will, not because you chased him.
If you keep on chasing him and don’t give him any space to pursue you, how will you ever know if he is really interested in you and wants to be with you or he is just staying with you because it’s easier than witnessing the drama that you would create if he tries to leave?
Just don’t do anything and relax. You have nothing to be scared about. If you don’t hear from him or he doesn’t make any efforts to stay in touch, you have all the answers that you need. It was not meant to be in the first place and it was not going to work out anyways.
When you take a step back and let the man lead, you learn about him – who he is naturally when you are not trying to get him to behave in ways that you like and what he really feels about you. If you just keep on chasing him, you will never know anything except how he reacts to being chased.
2) Date other people
The right mindset to cultivate is to have a single mindset till you and your partner have explicitly committed to each other.
He is not your boyfriend and you should not treat him like one, especially when he appears to be losing interest in you. You’re just dating to know about each other and if he is showing signs that he is not interested in you, then take note of that information and adjust your behaviour accordingly.
Until he becomes your boyfriend, just remember that he is just another guy that you are dating to find out if he could be compatible with you.
I know it can be very tempting to close your eyes and not notice other guys when you have your heart set on one guy but just think that if he has not decided to make the commitment to be in a relationship with you and he wants to keep his options open – why would you want to give your all to him?
The best way to cultivate a single’s mindset is to date other men –not to make your guy jealous. It’s not about him. It’s about you.
You should really keep an open mind about men and give them a chance. Go out and date them and get to know about them. Do not compare them with your guy or put him on a pedestal (no one is worth putting on a pedestal anyways!) and you could just blind yourself to other options, other men who have some fantastic qualities by fixating on this one guy!
Related: Why Men Suddenly Lose Interest When Dating: 6 Reasons
3) Focus on building your life
What to do if he is losing interest in you?
If he is losing interest in you, then it’s better if you focus on building your own life, instead of obsessing about him.
Maybe you don’t want to date multiple people at one time or you don’t have anyone worth dating in your life presently. That’s okay. It’s not necessary to be in a relationship all the time.
What is important is to learn that you do not give your heart away to someone who has not explicitly committed to you and to keep an open mind about men, whether you happen to be dating presently or not.
However, one thing that is non-negotiable at all times is: to focus on your life. Your life should never revolve around a man or a relationship. Sometimes when we are in a relationship, we don’t realize that we make our love interest the center of the universe.
Slowly and slowly, it becomes a pattern that we tend to repeat over and over again. When we are in our teens or in early stages of our relationships, this behaviour is ok but when we become an adult and we still drop all our goals, hobbies or friends for one guy, this is a very unhealthy behaviour and needs to be changed.
If you notice that your guy is losing interest, step back and see if you made him the center of your universe.
These things could be directly related because of two reasons:
a) It is a lot of pressure for any guy if your world revolves around him
b) If you don’t have any life, hobbies, interests or friends outside your relationship, then you would tend to be very boring, which is why he is losing interest in you.
4) Remember how great you are
What to do if he is losing interest in you? Remember your power and what a strong woman you are.
People get into relationships with the wrong mindsets. If you get into a relationship thinking that he is a prize and you need to win him, that’s just a wrong mindset.
You need to approach the relationships with the right mindset; i.e. dating to find out if you are compatible with someone. You shouldn’t feel anxious thinking that you need to prove your worth to someone or show to them that you are a great catch.
Just do your thing and live your life, your vibe will attract your tribe.
Make a list of your positive qualities, it may seem like vanity but it is just a way to be mindful of what your strengths are. If you have been suffering from low self-esteem, this may look like a daunting task; in that case, you can take help from a friend to enlist your positive qualities.
Are you kind? Are you fun loving? Are you a good listener? Make a list of all your good qualities with examples. Keep it handy or stick it in your room. Refer to this list, whenever you feel low or are anxious about your life.
Always remember that if someone doesn’t appreciate your good qualities, it doesn’t mean that they don’t exist or you aren’t worthy, it just means that he is not the right guy for you if he is not looking for those qualities or is unable to appreciate them. You don’t need to change him or adjust your behaviour to meet his liking.
If he is losing interest in you, then it’s better to just let him go, and instead, move on and be with someone you can be yourself with.
Related: 5 Reasons Why Men Lose Interest After Sex
5) Remember he’s just another human being
If you have started thinking that he’s the one just by dating him for a short period of time, and you are freaking out because he is losing interest in you, then not only it’s a lot of pressure on him but probably you are not also viewing him properly.
You have not fallen in love with him but an image that you have of him in your head. When you project your feelings on someone, it is essentially because you have just fallen in love an image and you have put that person on the pedestal.
And in the due course of time, when you would really see that the actual behavior doesn’t match with the image, and he is losing interest in you, your illusion will shatter very badly.
Therefore, it is important to keep this thing in mind from the very beginning.
Remember that he is just another being. Don’t put him on the pedestal.
See all his behavior, the good, the bad and the ugly. And evaluate if you guys are really compatible or not?
Take note of the overall personality and not just of the good points. We tend to do this when we are in love; we just exaggerate the good qualities and become blinded to the not so good ones.
It is very important to not let your heart get ahead of your head. Instead use your intellect to not give your heart away so easily, till you find someone whom you can trust with it.
6) Know how he feels does not define your worthiness in any way
This is the most important thing to understand, if he is losing interest in you. All of us are different people and want different things in relationships. Some people like introverted partners, some like extroverted partners, some like traveling, some are homebodies.
So when we are choosing partners, we are basically just looking at someone who is compatible with us and it does not reflect on the worthiness of any human being in any way.
So, if he is losing interest in you, it’s not because you are not interesting, it could be because he is looking for something else in a partner and that’s okay.
Never equate your worthiness with how your partner or anyone else for that matter feels about you.
Related: 5 Reasons Why Your Man Is Withdrawing And What You Can Do
Now that you know what to do if he is losing interest in you, make sure that you never forget your worth. If he is losing interest in you, that’s on him, not you.
Want to know more about if he is losing interest in you? Check this video out below!
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