Imagine a scenario where youโre texting someone you like, and everything seems great. Then, out of nowhere, they stop replying, and youโre stuck not knowing whatโs really going on. This is just one of the signs of soft ghosting.
Soft ghosting is usually a bit different from the usual ghosting because itโs more gradual. Imagine being left hanging without any explanation; it feels like a half-hearted response. You arenโt completely ignored, but youโre clearly not at the top of their list.
So, what is soft ghosting, really? And how to deal with soft ghosting? Letโs first try to understand what is soft ghosting.
Related: 7 Essential Psychological Truths About Ghosting
What Is Soft Ghosting?
Soft ghosting is the sly relative of regular ghosting that you might encounter while dating these days. Imagine talking to someone, and suddenly their replies become brief and unenthusiastic, making you question whatโs really happening.
They havenโt disappeared completely, like they do in classic ghosting. Instead, theyโre gradually pulling back, leaving you puzzled about the equation you share with them. Theyโre subtly hitting the brakes, without openly saying that itโs over.
Itโs annoying, somewhat perplexing, and leaves you hanging in mid-air. Soft ghosting is basically a more diluted version of ghosting, but it still manages to mess with your head and emotions.
Now that we have talked about what is soft ghosting, letโs discuss the signs of soft ghosting.
6 Signs Of Soft Ghosting
1. Itโs always you who texts them first, and the conversations feel awkward and forced.
This is probably one of the subtle signs of soft ghosting.
Even if they used to be one to text you first, lately, that has changed. These days, itโs always you who initiates a conversation, and shows interest in speaking to them. However, even when they do respond, itโs not long before the conversation starts to fizzle out because their replies seem uninterested and lead nowhere.
At times, they might just react with an emoji or a simple acknowledgment, hardly engaging in a real conversation. You canโt help but think that if you stopped texting, maybe you wouldnโt hear from them at all.
2. You receive short and curt replies from them.
It feels like someoneโs giving you the silent treatment over text. Conversations used to be easy and flowing, but now theyโre barely a trickle. You used to exchange heartfelt messages with each other, but now you get replies such as โcoolโ or โhaha.โ
It seems as though they donโt care anymore to put in any effort into your conversations. Your texts seem to bounce off the walls, and it can feel really frustrating. Itโs as if theyโve hit the mute button on meaningful conversation, making you wonder if theyโre still interested.
Related: What Is Ghostlighting? A New Dating Trend Thatโs Leaving People Hurt and Confused โ Explained
3. They never make plans anymore, nor are they available if you do.
This is one of the most obvious signs of soft ghosting.
Every time you try to make a plan, they are mysteriously unavailable, and they always seem to have an excuse up their sleeve. They always say theyโre swamped with work or already have plans. It feels like you keep hearing the same old excuses, and it makes you question if you even matter to them at all.
Whatโs worse, this isnโt an isolated incident, because it keeps happening. You struggle to remember when you last had a simple coffee with them or watched a movie together. The more they avoid hanging out with you, the more you wonder if theyโre doing this deliberately to stay away.
4. They see and read your messages, but donโt reply back most of the time.
Imagine youโre right outside their house, knocking hard on their door. They hear you, but they ignore you completely and donโt open the door. Thatโs exactly how it feels when they leave you on โreadโ; itโs like receiving a hard blow to your stomach.
You put your feelings into words, press send andโฆ crickets. Theyโve read it. They know youโre trying to connect. Yet, they keep quiet. Itโs as if theyโre playing some emotional hide-and-seek game with you, making you feel frustrated, unwanted and totally confused about where you stand with them.
5. You notice that they avoid deep conversations like the plague.
Another one of the major signs of soft ghosting is this right here.
Trying to have a meaningful conversation with them is like searching for hidden treasure and hitting a wall every time you find something even remotely valuable. Deep conversations used to be your jam once upon a time, but now itโs impossible to engage them in one.
You open up about your dreams and fears, but they change the subject or give excuses that theyโre busy or something. It can feel really disheartening because you miss those conversations, and how close you used to feel to them. This makes you feel disconnected and makes you wonder about how solid your bond really is.
6. Delayed responses have become the norm now.
Itโs like sending a message in a bottle and waiting for years for a reply to come โ except youโre not stranded on a deserted island, youโre just trying to have a normal conversation. Yes, they might be busy, however, if they reply to one text after 5 days, then itโs very clear that youโre not a priority for them.
Also, itโs not just about the time they take to reply, itโs the message theyโre trying to give to you. When theyโre always leaving you hanging, and that too without any explanation, theyโre basically telling you that youโre not important enough for them to make time for.
Now that we know the signs of soft ghosting, letโs talk about how to deal with soft ghosting.
Related: 5 Reasons Men Pull Away Or Ghost You When Dating
How To Deal With Soft Ghosting?
1. Give them some space.
Maybe they need some breathing room, because they are going through something they donโt want to talk about. If you feel theyโre soft ghosting you, then maybe give them some personal space and donโt bombard them with messages. Itโs like providing a plant with sunlight and water; all you need to do is give them some time to grow.
2. Focus on your own life.
When it comes to modern dating, never ever put all your eggs in one basket, my friend. Always make time for yourself, because at the end of the day, you matter. Workout, engage in your favorite hobbies, or even binge-watch your favorite show if you want. Always remember, that your happiness and self-worth doesnโt depend on their texts.
3. Communicate with them directly.
This is one of the best things to do if youโre wondering how to deal with soft ghosting.
Open and clear communication is seriously underrated when it comes to dating. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is simply talk to them about how you feel, however, keep it calm and non-confrontational. Ask then calmly whatโs going on and go from there.
4. Trust your instincts.
You will always know when somethingโs not right. If you feel that heavy sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach, every time you receive another curt reply or donโt get one at all, trust your gut. Try not to ignore red flags like this, just because youโre hoping for a different outcome.
5. Know when to walk away.
How to deal with soft ghosting? Sometimes, you need to realize when you should throw in the towel and move on. If their soft ghosting antics are causing you more stress and pain than happiness, itโs a sign that you need to say โpeace outโ and look for greener pastures. You deserve someone who is fully into you, not someone who is disinterested.
Related: 7 Things To Remember When People Keep On Ghosting You
Bottomline
Soft ghosting can feel like youโre on a roller coaster ride of emotions, and you donโt know when itโs going to stop. However, always remember that your life is in your hands, and only you get to decide how it should look.
Whatever you choose to do when faced with soft ghosting, remember to prioritize your happiness, peace of mind and self-respect.
Have you ever experienced any of these signs of soft ghosting? Let us know your thoughts in the comments down below!
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