Alice feels absolutely wonderful as the taxi takes her to the city of dreams- New York. A huge step – moving to New York and being single after years of being in a relationship. We all want this big experience. We think we really have to have this big single experience. Do things the way we want without listening to some guy babbling on about how you could do it differently.
She is single and then she meets Robin. Robin goes on to become her best friend in the whole world. But then they have a fall out because Robin points out the things that Alice doesn’t want to hear. Oops! Spoiler alert!
Whether you are in a relationship or single, this movie is a must-watch. There’s so much to learn from this movie whether it’s being confident with the person you are or simply what being single means.
Being single doesn’t mean that you have to hate men just because some jerk broke your heart. The experience of being single is worthy because it teaches you self-love and believing in who you are. It’s appreciating how far you’ve come even when you don’t think you made progress.
A movie can teach us so many lessons. So here’s all the things I learned from the movie “How to be Single”:
1. Don’t lose yourself in the relationship
Alice said to Josh “I’m so obsessed with the idea of being in love that I just, it’s like, I completely lose myself. Like, I forget what I want and I just disappear. I’m like the horse in ‘The Neverending Story’.”
Remember when Robin pointed out that Alice gets sucked into the guys’ world and forgets her individuality every time she is in a relationship. One of the most important things I learned from the movie “how to be single” was to not lose myself in a relationship. It is so important to have a life separate from your partner where you do things that you love. You don’t have to do everything with him. You don’t have to adjust your schedule according to his. Do your thing girl..because if you don’t know how to live your life, no one else will. You need to stand your ground and stick to your plans. Everything else will fall into place.
2. Heartbreak is valuable
Alice got her heart broken so many times in the movie. On the quest of figuring out her life, she learned how heartbreak is valuable. It may not feel like that initially but with time, you will understand how important heartbreak is. The phase of pulling yourself together after heartbreak is such an essential aspect of life. Whether you agree or not, you will learn something or the other from every heartbreak you encounter.
Read also Why its better to stay single than in a toxic relationship?
3. Practicing self-love is hard but worth it
It is hard. Learning to do things all by yourself when you had a partner do all of that for you is HARD. Remember when Alice started figuring out her single life, she didn’t even know how to set up her own wifi or switch off the Spanish subtitles on her TV. She missed Josh because he used to do it for her. Self-love means learning to be confident with what you do. It doesn’t necessarily have to be like it was portrayed in the movie. You don’t have to go out and hook up with some stranger at the bar. If that’s not your style, that is fine. But if it is, that is fine too.
Self-love is knowing your limits. It’s learning to sleep in the middle of the bed and not the side (if you know what I mean). It’s about reading books, spending time with your best friend, learning to live in an empty apartment all by yourself, and being okay with it.
Self-love isn’t always fun and games. Sometimes it’s also about facing our worst fears and learning to deal with them.
4. Work on your goals
Alice wanted to watch the sunrise on New Year’s Day on the top of the Grand Canyon. Seems easy when someone just lists it out on their New Year resolutions but quite difficult to master. She figured that if she didn’t work on her goals or resolutions she would never be able to do it. One of the greatest things I learned from the movie how to be single was to work on your goals. No matter how hard it may seem or even if you are alone, it is possible to achieve what you set your mind to.
Alice practiced rock climbing every day at the gym, assessed herself, and sorted out all the skills she needed to do to make this dream come true. It may take some time but it is worth it.
5. Everyone must experience the joy of being single
One of the things that really stuck with me was this quote Alice said in the end.
“The thing about being single is, you should cherish it. Because, in a week, or a lifetime, of being alone, you may only get one moment. One moment, when you’re not tied up in a relationship with anyone. A parent, a pet, a sibling, a friend. One moment, when you stand on your own. Really, truly single. And then… It’s gone.”
I think it’s important to experience the joy of being single. One of the greatest joys of singlehood is learning to do things on your own without needing anyone’s help. Sometimes we all need help. But you will see what I mean about doing things on your own when you experience it. You should cherish this wonderful experience with yourself. This means going out with yourself to the movies or eating by yourself. Cherish doing whatever it is you love doing. Some of us think it’s weird to eat alone or go to the movies alone. But one of the greatest lessons I learned from the movie how to be single is that the feeling of going out with yourself is legendary and amazing.
Read also How to be Happy When You’re Single: 5 Things to Consider
You define how you want to be single. You can choose to be miserable and think of meeting a guy every single day of your single life or you can choose to experience and explore it to the fullest. Instead of searching for a partner who you believe will make you happy, learn to be happy with yourself. How can someone else know how to love you, if you don’t know how to love yourself.
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