23 Eye-Opening Life Lessons About Love That Everyone Learns The Hard Way

Lessons About Love Youll Learn The Hard Way 1

Love makes life worth living, right? But life also teaches you the meaning of love. Hereโ€™re the 23 life lessons about love youโ€™ll learn over the course of your life!

Love is one of the most beautiful emotions we can experience in our lives. It can bring us immense joy, happiness, excitement, and fulfillment. It can even make us feel euphoric at times when weโ€™re on cloud nine!

However, love is not always easy. It requires work, dedication, and a willingness to grow, bend, and learn. Love also entails pain, heartbreak, and hard lessons.

And in our journey of life, these lessons that we learn over the years teach us the meaning of love and to appreciate true love when it appears in our life.

Life teaches us how to identify true love from infatuation, how to make a relationship work, how to fight for the one you love, and how to let it all go!

Yes, the life lessons about love are not easy. We learn them the hard way, at the cost of our tears, hopes, dreams, and efforts.

We learn these lessons about love as we grow old and evolve, and hence, when youโ€™re in your teen years or in your 20s, itโ€™s not possible to fathom what you would realize in your mid-30s or later.

However, knowing about these love lessons can save you a lot of heartache and despair. These lessons can bring insights into your difficult experiences, help you make sense of the pain and setbacks that you endure, and feel more hopeful about love!

So, hereโ€™re the most valuable lessons about love that can help you navigate the complexities of this powerful emotion.

Read How Do You Know You Love Someone? 30 Signs That Say You Are Falling Hard

23 Eye-Opening Life Lessons About Love

Hereโ€™re the life lessons about love that will make you appreciate your journey and fill your heart with hope and optimism.

1. Your First Love Is You

Self-love is essential to a healthy relationship, and taking control of your life is the first step toward achieving it. This can easily be the top-most important lesson learned about love.

If you do not develop a happy and healthy relationship with yourself, how will you ever know whether youโ€™re choosing someone for love or for coping with your loneliness or insecurities?

When youโ€™re in love with yourself, you donโ€™t feel desperate, you donโ€™t feel codependent, and you wonโ€™t mistake toxicity or abuse for normal relationship challenges.

Moreover, when youโ€™re self-assured and taking care of yourself, youโ€™ll be able to show up in your relationship with more passion, joy, and playfulness, not bitterness, aggression, and resentment.

Read How To Be The Woman Of His Dreams: 8 Essential Steps

2. Love Is A Choice

Love is not like a magic wand that will make your life smooth and easy, but itโ€™s a decision to commit to someone and stand by them through thick and thin.

One of the life lessons about love that youโ€™ll learn quite early is that love is a choice you make every day, even on days (better to say especially on days) when your partner is being difficult, rude, or unloving toward you or misunderstandings and life struggles are making you both bitter and snappy.

love lessons

3. Love Is A Verb

This lesson learned about love over time is a no-brainer really. Love means action.

When you sincerely feel about someone, you just donโ€™t ask them to take care, you help them to take care of themselves. You donโ€™t ask them to calm down when theyโ€™re overwhelmed, you make them calm down with gentleness and patience.

You keep your promises. You show up on time. You fix things around the house. You do the dishes. You do little acts of service. You try to make their life easier.

4. Love Means Being Vulnerable

Itโ€™s okay if youโ€™re the one who loves the most or is the most vulnerable. It takes courage to open up and express your authentic feelings, but itโ€™s worth it.

Another moral lesson about love is to forsake your ego. True love must have enough room for vulnerability. If you feel safe being vulnerable with someone, donโ€™t hold yourself back!

5. Love Means Acceptance

When you truly love someone, you donโ€™t try to change them. One of the major love lessons that life will teach you is that true love is accepting someone for who they are and supporting them in their personal growth.

You might suggest what you think will help them to be more well-rounded or happier in life, but youโ€™ll realize that you can only change yourself and the way you react to others, you can not change others, and neither you should try!

moral lesson about love

6. Love Is Not Always Rainbows And Sunshine

One of the lessons about love that can really put things into perspective is that love doesnโ€™t equate to happiness.

Love is not always fair game. While it can bring you joy, fulfillment, and happiness, there will be days, when it will bring you tears, make you question yourself, and seem like the biggest mistake of your life.ย 

And thatโ€™s the beauty of love! It isnโ€™t always easy. There will be ups and downs. But in the end, itโ€™s all alright! All the painful experiences will teach you something about love and bring you and your partner even closer.ย 

If you truly love someone, a day will come in your life, when youโ€™ll look back and say that you have enjoyed every single moment of it, and if given the chance, youโ€™ll make the choice to go through this journey again, in a heartbeat.ย 

7. Conflicts Can Also Bring You Closerย 

One of the critical love lessons is that itโ€™s okay and even normal to fight at some point in your relationship. But itโ€™s how you fight that can make or break your relationship.

Itโ€™s essential to communicate with your partner respectfully and constructively. Thereโ€™re some lines that you never cross, even when youโ€™re mad at each other. And both partners need to be mindful of each otherโ€™s boundaries.

Itโ€™s also important to apologize and own up to your mistakes. When you care deeply about someone, youโ€™ll never let them go easily and neither youโ€™ll do something to hurt them purposefully.ย 

Remember that itโ€™s the challenges you face together that make our bond stronger and how you handle your conflicts determines the success of your relationship.

The difficult time that you worked out together, as a couple, can make some of the most cherished memories and make your bond stronger, deeper, and long-lasting.

8. Love Teaches Forgiveness

One truly liberating lesson learned about love is surely how to forgive the one you love. In love, you donโ€™t keep scores.

Holding on to grudges only damages our relationships. If you love someone, you donโ€™t remind them of their past mistakes, you donโ€™t seek revenge, or try to get even with them.

If your partner is genuinely sorry for whatever they have done, and never repeats their mistake, you choose to forgive them.

lesson learned about love

9. A Healthy Compromise Is Often Needed

When youโ€™re in love, you prioritize your relationship with them over your ego. In the course of your relationship, there can be many squabbles and minor arguments.

One important moral lesson about love is, if you truly care about your relationship, you will not let these petty conflicts create a rift between you two.

Youโ€™ll strive to reach a happy compromise. Youโ€™ll be willing to make sacrifices for the one you love and work towards finding common ground.

10. You Learn To Love

You may be more empathetic than your partner and can be more nurturing, caring, or attuned to emotions. While your significant other may struggle to express their feelings or might even show avoidance when faced with emotionally overwhelming situations.

But whatever your attachment style may be, loving another person is something you learn. One of the most important lessons about love is that love needs to be learned.

Itโ€™s not something youโ€™re born knowing how to do, but something you develop over time through your experiences with each other and this includes understanding each otherโ€™s love language.

11. Being Complementary Helps Your Compatibilityย 

Next up on your love lessons is that your differences can make your relationships stronger if you learn to appreciate and work with them.

When you love your partner, youโ€™ll be glad to balance their practicality with your emotions, their skepticism with your faith, or their reserved nature with your impulsive one.

12. Enjoy Your Life To The Fullestย ย ย 

One of the lessons about love youโ€™ll learn is that a positive mindset is necessary to have a happy life, which in turn leads to a sustainable, successful, and fulfilling relationship.

If you can make the most out of your everyday life, every moment can be a romantic moment. You donโ€™t have to wait for a long vacation abroad with your partner to deepen your tie.

Waiting in line at the check-out counter of the grocery store or cooking together on a Sunday afternoon can equally spell romance for you.

13. (No) Conditions Applied!

True love teaches us to give, accept, and nurture, without expectations. Yes, itโ€™s natural for you to expect your person to reciprocate your feelings, check in with you, care for you, prioritize you, and give you attention, but what if they donโ€™t do any of these things?

Will you stop loving them? You can choose to move on or leave the relationship, but you cannot stop yourself from still loving them. Thatโ€™s the thing about love, it doesnโ€™t understand the concept of the barter economy.

One of the vital life lessons about love is that true love requires us to put the needs of others before our own and to love without conditions.

lessons about love

14. Communication Is A Two Way Street

One of the important love lessons is the role of open and honest communication. And this means:

  • Expressing yourself honestly
  • Being vulnerable
  • Being open about your boundaries and desires
  • Listening intently with empathy
  • Understanding each other without judgment
  • Responding with compassion, not with criticism

15. Love Shows You The Truth Of Others

Another moral lesson about love that hits home is that when you find love, it will show you who your real friends are.

Some of your closest friends will remain a constant source of support regardless of your relationship status. They will offer you unbiased suggestions when you struggle with your connection and cheer you on when you enjoy your time with your partner.

While some others will abandon you the moment you start investing your time into someone else other than them. These โ€œfrenemiesโ€ will be the first ones to hit you with the โ€œI told you soโ€ when/if your relationship hits a rough patch.

They might even try to sabotage your romantic bond by being negative about your person of interest. Your relationship will reveal who truly cares about you and who just wants to leech onto your energy.

Read How To Spot A Frenemy? 12 Signs Someone Is Pretending To Be Your Friend

16. You Will Need To Embrace Change

One moral lesson about love youโ€™ll learn with age is the importance of being adaptable and flexible in your relationship, as they will inevitably evolve over time. Your person will also grow and go through changes.

The changes can be due to life experiences, maturity that comes with age, or spiritual awakening, but itโ€™s important to remember that though a person can change their beliefs or attitude, theyโ€™re the same person you once fell in love with.

Love is an amalgamation of many emotions; affection, care, passion, and attraction โ€ฆ while these emotions can waver, love at the core, still remains constant.

Read 8 Reasons Why Spiritual Awakening Breaks Your Relationships And What You Can Do About It

17. Love Makes You Content

One of the eye-opening life lessons about love is when youโ€™re in love, youโ€™ll tend to appreciate what you have built with that person and not always be searching for something more.

Yes, there will always be someone younger, richer, burlier, or prettier, but you are just not interested; you are not looking for anything else.

18. Love Can Make Us Act Out Of Character

A hard lesson learned about love is that itโ€™s a heady mix and it can make us forget ourselves.

We can totally get lost in love. When things are good, we can get so engrossed in our relationship, that we might start neglecting our personal growth or well-being.

And during difficult times, love can bring out the worst in us. We can say and do things that are totally not in sync with our character. Itโ€™s essential to recognize when your emotions get the best of you.ย 

19. Patience Can Save Your Relationship

Relationships require time and effort and you must be patient and willing to work through challenges as they arise.

If you react every time your partner makes a mistake or behaves in a way that you donโ€™t approve of, your relationship will not survive.

You will need to learn when to step back and when to assert yourself. And if you can develop patience, you will be able to take a pause after you get triggered and manage your response.

20. Be Self-Reliant

love lessons

Independence and self-reliance are important in a relationship. You must maintain your own identity and pursue your passion and not rely solely on your partner for fulfillment.

This will help your relationship. You will not become clingy and will be able to offer your partner the support and space that they may need.

Read How Codependency Can Pose A Big Threat?

21. Love Doesnโ€™t Make Us Desperate

One of the commonly overlooked life lessons about love is you should never settle for less than you deserve in a relationship and should never cling to someone out of desperation.

22. Love Doesnโ€™t Bind, It Liberatesย 

Sometimes, the most loving thing you can do is to let someone go and allow them to find their own path. That path can lead them back to you or not.

But if you love someone, sooner or later, youโ€™ll realize that you cannot force them to be with you or show up the way you want them to.

A vital moral lesson about love is that sometimes itโ€™s best to let them go. Maybe keep the porch light on, (as long as it feels okay) in case they need help to come back home.

moral lesson about love

23. Love Will Make You Powerful

The ultimate lesson learned about love is that love will make you resilient.

When you fight for love, knowing very well that you donโ€™t expect anything in return, and can let go of the one whom you love the most if needed, you become powerful from within!


Itโ€™s Worth It โ€ฆ

Love is a complex and powerful emotion that requires work and dedication to maintain, as well as detachment.

By understanding these 23 life lessons about love, you can navigate relationship challenges, love intentionally, and build lasting connections.

Remember to approach love with an open mind and a willingness to learn and grow, and youโ€™ll find that itโ€™s one of the most rewarding experiences life has to offer.


Frequently Asked Questions

What is the spiritual meaning of love?

Love is believed to be the highest vibrational frequency. When weโ€™re in love, weโ€™re creating a space of acceptance, harmony, compassion, and positivity within us and around us.

What to do when someone you love pushes you away?

Accept the situation. Donโ€™t feel bad for expressing your needs or being vulnerable. Give them the space and time they need. Focus on your well-being.

What is fatuous love?

A speedy courtship that leads to a whirlwind marriage, primarily driven by intense passion, without the scope for intimacy.

What is consummate love?

Itโ€™s the ultimate form of love that symbolizes the ideal relationship that many individuals seek but only a few are able to attain and fewer can sustain.


life lessons about love

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