Human beings are the product of their conditioning and experiences. However, oneโs constitutional make up that includes the emotional and psychological constituents are also what shapes the behaviors of human beings. To all these, add the modern technology, cultural complexities and dating games and societal norms and you will see all these contribute to the attachment and commitment issues in relationships.
Men and women are different in ways how to act and respond to the various stimuli in relationships. Research shows men are more prone to stay emotionally detached in a relationship than women.
The following points listed will tell you why your man avoids emotional attachments or he has problems committing to you.
1. He is player
One of the most obvious reasons why he is not committing to you or stays emotionally detached to you is that he is point blank not serious about you. Men in general love challenges in life and most men in some point of their life or other did treat the women in their life as means to have fun or stroke their ego. If he is constantly giving you mixed signals, disappears off your life often, and then reappears with sweet and savory reasons and too hard to believe sob story chances are he is a player.
2. He is a workaholic
Some men eat, sleep and breathe their work. For them, their career is above everything else. They do not have the time and patience for the relationships in life. Work for them is the temple in life. These men do not do relationships at all.
3. He is too much of a perfectionist
Perfection is good. But some men want perfection with the perfect T. These men no matter how good you are, he will nitpick whatever you do or did not. They will try to change you because you do not conform to his lists of perfection. At the end of the day, he will not commit to you because he thinks you are not good for him.
4. Overtly independent or dependent
Too much dependence or independence is not good. You might have met some men who will constantly seek approval from others or take into account the opinions of his mother who to date or who not to. On the other hand are so much independent, that they cannot become vulnerable in front of others. Even if that other person is the woman he is dating. Both these categories of men do not easily commit. They avoid getting emotionally attached.
5. Bitter past relationships
Another obvious reason why he is wary of the relationship or does not want to get emotionally involved with you is that he had some seriously toxic experiences with regards to the relationships in life. His past girlfriend or wife might have left a bitter taste in him which makes him question about the intention of every woman in this world.
6. Troubled childhood
Like I have mentioned earlier every human being is the product of their past experiences, it extends to the childhood experiences as well. Our childhood shapes our future. If he had a troubled childhood where he did not have a loving set of parents, parents who do not see eye to eye each other, or where he was badly abused, he is likely to stay emotionally detached. For all the above reasons he may have difficulties in expressing himself or opening up to you making him emotionally unavailable to some extent at least.
7. Financial instability
Most men are conditioned to believe that they are the upper-hand, when it comes to finances at a house. However modern they may show their thoughts to be, in their most rudimentary psyche, they still feel they should be the primary breadwinner.
If he is financially not at a good place, trust me he will have many issues in his life relating to his confidence and peace of mind. It will automatically influence his relationship with you. If he feels he cannot buy you the things you want, or contribute to the household expenses much he will not commit to you.
8. Family issues
Supposedly there is a problem in his family that he too stressed about. Or he gives too much importance to the opinions of his family as who to date and who not to. It may be also one of the reasons why he is seriously not committing to you.
9. Insecurities
You may have the perfect job that gives you a very handsome salary. Or you might look like really out of the fashion magazines divas. If you are any above of these two or both, he might be insecure about him. He might be wary of the relationship because he feels you can always date anybody who is richer and have movie star good looks that will suit you! His insecurities about you are, in this case, is restricting your relationship.
10. Your goals in life are dissimilar
Goals in life are very important. It might happen that both of you are too much dissimilar, and he feels having him in your life will restrict him from achieving those goals. Or it may be that he feels he does not particularly appreciate or understand your goals or life choices. This will also make him wary of becoming emotionally attached to you.
Men are rough around the edges but they also need love and affection in their life to soften them up. But always know if the man is emotionally unavoidable, is it for genuine issues or he is plainly not interested in you. Always know your worth and know when to back off from the relationship if he is not all giving any signs to become committed to you.
Best wishes,
Happy relationships!
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