The One That Got Away

You left me vulnerable and I’ve become stronger as the years passed by. You taught me to start afresh, to value time and life. Though, there are still a handful of should haves and could haves in my heart, I learned how to comfort myself by the worn out line “Everything happens for a reason”and though I may not understand the reasons yet, I am holding onto God’s promise of eternal life. Do you know what that means?

To my love, my MVP, my singer, my comforter, my number one fan, now my Guardian Angel

At 18, I thought I would be experiencing typical teenage problems. But I was totally wrong. I cannot put into words the moments that we have shared from the day that I met you until the day that I lost you. It has been 4 years but it feels like it was only yesterday. Time came like lightning. It was so fast. I felt like I was hit for a moment, but the damage felt like something that won’t heal for the rest of my life. As you may have noticed, I rarely talk about you to people but there are still times that I pause for a while and think. What would it be like if you were still here? Maybe we would end up together or maybe not, but it doesn’t matter as long as I know that you are breathing and having the best time of your life even though I am not a part of it anymore.
I thought our love story will end up the way most people’s do. We started back in high school; we were so young way back then and I never expected that our relationship would last for days, weeks, months until it became 3 years and more. There were a lot of things that led to the break-up but we then realized that our love is stronger than any obstacles that will come in our way. Though there were also a lot of things that changed as time passed by, luckily, we grew up together and our story survived for years and I am nothing but proud of what we had.

But who would have thought that your life would end too soon?

Remember when we used to talk about our future? We promised that no matter what happens we will end up together and when the time finally comes when we are both stable, we will build our own family and we will have a basketball team of children. I would laugh and tell you that it is okay as long as you would are the one who gives birth. We built and planned our dreams together. You once dreamed of coming here… look where I am now. I made your dream come true. I hope you are proud.
Remember the times we used to sing together? You would string your guitar and start singing our song. As I close my eyes, I can hear your cold voice singing with the angels above.

You were such a funny guy. You always made me smile and laugh without even trying but you don’t have any idea how much you made me cry when you left me. When you left, I was so scared. Scared because I don’t know how to face the world without you. Exactly one month when we decided to part ways, I was honestly confident that it was just a typical fight… that we will still come back to each other, but I never knew that that was the end.

It was a sudden change of plans..

You are sorely missed. Don’t you know that? We will see each other again soon. In God’s time.We may not be breathing the same air anymore nor looking at the same sky but your memories are indelibly imprinted in my mind. For the present moment, let me breathe the stimulating air of early November for you. Let me be your senses while you are enjoying yourself in paradise with God where there is no more pain, chaos, starvation— far far away from the cruel world down here. It has been a rough journey for all of us, hasn’t it? But we are so lucky that once in our lives, you became part of my life just as I became part of yours. There is no Good bye, only see you soon. Until we meet again.