10 Signs Your Inner Voice is Holding You Back

“You forgot to switch off the geyser again.” “You never remember your charger.” Stop! That’s your inner voice turning your tiny mistakes into fixed labels for you.

And you never even noticed that somewhere along the way, it stopped supporting you and started pressuring you. Now it sounds more like a critic-always pointing out what you should do, how you should be better, and what you’re falling behind on.

This way, instead of helping you grow, it holds you back. Even when you’re exhausted, it pushes you to do more-until you feel like you’re constantly at war with yourself.

At its core, this voice is rooted in self-doubt. And noticing it is the first step to changing it.

10 Signs Your Inner Voice is Actually Holding You Back Instead of Uplifting You

1. You overthink even the smallest of decisions

You keep thinking and thinking before having to make even a simple decision. You always tend to second-guess yourself. 

You try to think of and calculate every worst-case scenario of all your possible outcomes. Often, procrastination becomes its consequence.

2. You overprepare for opportunities yet talk yourself out of them

You always prepare to the minutest details for every opportunity. You might have even practised a thousand times, simulating how it can go. 

But, in the end, the inner voice will end up reminding you of your faults and lowering your self-worth. You end up talking yourself out of opportunities you have yourself been excited for.

3. You cannot seem to break free from cycles of constant comparison with others

You keep shrinking your achievements and fixating on how others are doing greater and more than you. 

You make unhealthy comparisons of yourself with others constantly, without even thinking that they might have had different levels of resources than you.  

Read More Here: How to Tame and Silence Your Inner Critic: 5 Ways

4. You always look for external validation or permission

It becomes impossible to satisfy or live up to the expectations of the inner voice. Hence, you tend to become more prone to looking for some sort of validation that comes from others. 

This keeps you perpetually dependent on approval and permission that comes from an external source.

5. You tend to keep replaying even a moment of a single mistake repeatedly

Your inner self sets a standard for yourself that is impeccably higher than it is for others. If anyone else has made a mistake or had a moment of miss, that is allowed, according to you. 

However, you do not allow yourself to receive the same compassion. You keep replaying conversations and scenarios in your head, even long after it has been over like some sort of self-punishment. 

You keep ruminating about how you could have handled it differently. 

6. Breaking free from your comfort zone seems difficult, as it makes you feel safe and at peace

Your inner-voice is likely to prioritize familiarity and safety over the healthy risks that can bring you growth. The criticising inner self tries to act like a guardian, choosing what brings predictability, keeping you in your comfort zone. 

Breaking free from it to pursue greater challenges feels dangerous, with your inner self using your shame and self-doubt against you. 

7. You dim your shine in order to make others comfortable

Your inner-voice likely developed its pattern from echoing the criticizing words, whether from your parents as you grew up or any other authority figures. 

Deep-seated insecurities accompany fear of rejection, making you make yourself small to avoid being “too much”, which can make you lose connection or be unlikable.  

8. You have increased self doubt that makes it difficult to trust your own decisions 

Your inner-voice constantly criticising you makes you start to doubt yourself more and more. You begin to lose faith in your ability to make decisions, developing an inability to trust them. 

This keeps you stuck in the loop of chasing perfection and external validation, further making you prone to tendencies of self doubt and the trust issues with yourself that come along.

9. Your inner self speaks in extremes of “always” or “never”

Your inner-voice is likely to exaggerate the number of times you did something which created an issue. 

Maybe it was just twice or thrice, but to your inner-voice, it becomes in the tones of always or never. 

You, too, start to believe in this noise of the extremes.

10. Overcoming self-doubt feels like choosing your fears over your intuition

Your inner-voice is loud and dramatic and can change the patterns of your intuition. 

It can expertly mask itself so even when a part of you that feels like your sense of intuition speaking to you begins to sound untrustworthy. 

It keeps you stuck in cycles of fear, and overcoming self-doubt feels like choosing those fears.

How to Overcome Self-Doubt?

•  When your inner voice starts to hinder your growth, actively name it, do not be it
• Act before you feel ready, that’s the only way you can wire confidence into your system
• Your brain trusts proofs more than anything so start jotting down your wins even if it feels mechanical at first
• While imagining the worst-case scenarios as consequences, deliberately try to visualize handling them well instead
• Start taking small and consistent actions despite what your self-doubting inner voice says 

Read More Here: How Delusional Confidence Can Help You Succeed (Even If You Doubt Yourself)

So, the bottom line is…

Your harsh inner voice can play a very contradictory role in your life. 

On one hand, it would push you beyond your limits and constantly criticize you for not being enough. But, on the other hand, it won’t even let you take a healthier risk.

It will constantly make you doubt your instincts and replace them with fear. You might end up thinking it is laziness. 

It is not so. More often than not, it’s your inner self, acting according to a learned coping mechanism, trying to protect your wounded inner child.

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Frequently Asked Questions

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