What Each Zodiac Sign Is Waiting For

ARIES – An “I miss you” text from that person you claim to be over

TAURUS – Your roommate to leave for the grocery store so you can walk around the house in your underwear

GEMINI – The Nobel Prize committee to acknowledge your contributions in the field of Internet Discourse

CANCER – Everyone to realize your intuition was correct as usual

LEO – A flimsy excuse to start shit as an antidote for your boredom

VIRGO – Friday, just on principle, even though all days feel the same

LIBRA – A buyer for the genius gadget you just invented in your head

SCORPIO – Your best friend to name their first-born child after you

SAGITTARIUS – Your turn to participate in the conversation again

CAPRICORN – The clothes you bought online ten whole minutes ago to arrive

AQUARIUS – Someone else to join the Zoom meeting and save you from making small talk with a coworker you don’t know very well

PISCES – It to be socially acceptable to melt into your chair at dinner