An open letter from a 27 year old dying woman- a day before her death.
You might be dissatisfied with your life. Not enough money, unfulfilling job, meandering relationship. Perhaps you spend too much time online arguing about politics with strangers. Sometimes we all feel like something is missing, and perhaps all we need is a little perspective.
“If something is making you miserable, you do have the power to change it – in work or love or whatever it may be. Have the guts to change. You don’t know how much time you’ve got on this earth so don’t waste it being miserable.”
These are the words of Holly Butcher, from Grafton in NSW, Australia. She recently lost her battle with Ewing’s sarcoma, a rare form of cancer that primarily affects young people. Holly was just 27 when she passed away.
As she came to terms with her mortality, a heartrendingly painful thing to have to do at such a young age, Holly decided to write an open letter about the lessons she learned, reflecting on the way her experience made her come to value every second of her time on earth.
“I’m 27 now. I don’t want to go,” she wrote.
“I love my life. I am happy… I owe that to my loved ones. But the control is out of my hands.”
Perhaps Holly’s words, coming from the heart with passion and a searing honesty, will help people to see the bigger picture, one that is often lost in a sea of ultimately meaningless stresses and worries that quickly consume our everyday existence. She urges us to grasp the things that are important, and live life to the full.
“That’s the thing about life, it is fragile, precious, unpredictable and each day is a gift, not a given right.”
Scroll down to read Holly’s letter, give your loved ones a hug, and smile, because you are alive!
This is Holly Butcher. She posted her final message on Facebook
The very next day, she passed away from cancer with her family by her side. She was just 27 years old
Her powerful message has been shared around the world, as people related to her passionate advice to live life to its fullest
POWERFUL ADVICE FROM DYING 27-YEAR-OLD WOMAN
Below is an excerpt from her post, which you can read in full here.
“Be grateful for each day you don’t have pain and even the days where you are unwell with man flu, a sore back or a sprained ankle, accept it is shit but be thankful it isn’t life-threatening and will go away.“
Whinge less, people! .. And help each other more.
Give, give, give. It is true that you gain more happiness doing things for others than doing them for yourself. I wish I did this more.
Since I have been sick, I have met the most incredibly giving and kind people and been the receiver of the most thoughtful and loving words and support from my family, friends, and strangers; More than I could I ever give in return. I will never forget this and will be forever grateful to all of these people.
It is a weird thing having money to spend at the end.. when you’re dying. It’s not a time you go out and buy material things that you usually would, like a new dress. It makes you think how silly it is that we think it is worth spending so much money on new clothes and ‘things’ in our lives.
Buy your friend something kind instead of another dress, beauty product or jewellery for that next wedding. 1. No-one cares if you wear the same thing twice 2. It feels good. Take them out for a meal, or better yet, cook them a meal. Shout their coffee. Give/ buy them a plant, a massage or a candle and tell them you love them when you give it to them.
Value other people’s time. Don’t keep them waiting because you are shit at being on time. Get ready earlier if you are one of those people and appreciate that your friends want to share their time with you, not sit by themselves, waiting on a mate.
You will gain respect too! Amen sister.
This year, our family agreed to do no presents and despite the tree looking rather sad and empty (I nearly cracked Christmas Eve!), it was so nice because people didn’t have the pressure of shopping and the effort went into writing a nice card for each other.
Plus imagine my family trying to buy me a present knowing they would probably end up with it themselves.. strange! It might seem lame but those cards mean more to me than any impulse purchase could.
Mind you, it was also easier to do in our house because we had no little kiddies there. Anyway, moral of the story- presents are not needed for a meaningful Christmas. Moving on.
Use your money on experiences.. Or at least don’t miss out on experiences because you spent all your money on material shit.
Put in the effort to do that day trip to the beach you keep putting off. Dip your feet in the water and dig your toes in the sand. Wet your face with salt water.
Get amongst nature.
Try just enjoying and being in moments rather than capturing them through the screen of your phone. Life isn’t meant to be lived through a screen nor is it about getting the perfect photo.. enjoy the bloody moment, people! Stop trying to capture it for everyone else.
Random rhetorical question. Are those several hours you spend doing your hair and make up each day or to go out for one night really worth it? I’ve never understood this about females ????.
Get up early sometimes and listen to the birds while you watch the beautiful colors the sun makes as it rises.
Listen to music.. really listen. Music is therapy. Old is best.
Cuddle your dog. Far out, I will miss that.
Talk to your friends. Put down your phone. Are they doing okay?
Travel if it’s your desire, don’t if it’s not.
Work to live, don’t live to work.
Seriously, do what makes your heart feel happy.
Eat the cake. Zero guilt.
Say no to things you really don’t want to do.
Don’t feel pressured to do what other people might think is a fulfilling life.. you might want a mediocre life and that is so okay.
Tell your loved ones you love them every time you get the chance and love them with everything you have.
Also, remember if something is making you miserable, you do have the power to change it – in work or love or whatever it may be. Have the guts to change. You don’t know how much time you’ve got on this earth so don’t waste it being miserable. I know that is said all the time but it couldn’t be more true.
Anyway, that’s just this one young gals life advice. Take it or leave it, I don’t mind!
Oh and one last thing, if you can, do a good deed for humanity (and myself) and start regularly donating blood. It will make you feel good with the added bonus of saving lives.
I feel like it is something that is so overlooked considering every donation can save 3 lives! That is a massive impact each person can have and the process really is so simple.
Blood donation (more bags than I could keep up with counting) helped keep me alive for an extra year – a year I will be forever grateful that I got to spend it here on Earth with my family, friends and dog. A year I had some of the greatest times of my life.
..’Til we meet again.
Hol
You may also like:
- When You Are Dying And No One Notices – What You Can Lear From The Joyce Vincent Story
- 24 Hard Hitting Truths About Existence That Will Force You to Get Your Shit Together
- Powerful Advice From a Dying Man
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