Having an attentive and perceptive attitude should be realized in any constructive and rewarding relationship.
Perceptiveness is an intuitive skill all unto itself. And in order to develop a knack for it, one should attempt to make a habit of being tuned in and observant.
With a conscious disposition, should come a discerning instinct.
Apply this instinct.
And therefore, make further opportunities for more productive relationships.
By doing so, personal growth will allow for the capacity to develop deeper insight.
FIRST CONNECTION
In any positive exchange, if there is going to be an initial connection, one should always be prepared to give the other person a chance.
There may be elements of risk involved, such as the possibility of being rejected, after being out there. There is also the aspect of vulnerability. This could be troublesome for those people who do not want to be exposed, or have their defenses down.
I, for one, am a hardened first-connector. I always put myself out there. But some people may be more sensitive than others, and do not want themselves to be so susceptible. But I would say that in these instances, it is still possible to be guarded, while being on the line. As long as we retain our wits, there is always something to take away, and learn, from any experience.
PERSPECTIVE
I tend to think that seeing things from another person’s perspective, as well as from a personal point of view, is helpful. In other words, see a person as being separate, as well as putting oneself in his, or her, shoes. I think this lends itself to “thinking outside the box” in a relationship.
Rather than being selfish, or immature, and seeing things from only a personal viewpoint — I would advise to leave this standpoint and see the relationship from “outside the box”, or from a different angle, or context.
TIME
Time is very beneficial, when using it to better understand another person. In fact, it is often said that time is the currency, of any relationship – So always make an effort to invest time into a relationship; especially one with worthwhile potential.
Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. No one is perfect and every person is different. There is always good along with bad.
For example, along with a person’s aptitude, there may be limitations. Or a person may be emotionally savvy, but have an insensitive nature. A person can even seem to be the most intelligent individual in the world, but may have emotional deficiencies.
Of course, there must be a certain degree of acceptance.
But also take into account what is compatible with one’s own personality.
What is one’s own tolerance threshold?
Is one’s own nature adaptable?
How much of another person’s flaws would one be willing to accept?
A person could also be very stubborn.
But how malleable is oneself?
CHANCES
I would advise one to be a generous giver of chances, so that a relationship can take hold in the first instance. Good relationships are invaluable.
But never enable another person to take advantage. Generosity also has its limits.
There are times when moving away from a relationship, which has no chance of working, would be gainful. And there would be huge relief in moving away.
Or in other cases, simply taking time out, could be sensible — It could result in a refreshed mindset, and new angles, from which to view the relationship. A renewed outlook is ever useful.
And now for a rule of thumb which I live by – Be willing to fall in love.
Take that chance. I don’t just mean romantic love, but be willing to fall in any kind of love — There is familiarity and sanctity in this emotion. I feel there is a certain inviolability that comes with this feeling.
But know that as one can fall in love, one can also fall out of love.
So be able to forgive — Be willing to fall in love over and over again.
LOVING AND LIKING
I have heard many a time, that loving a person can take place without liking them.
In my own case, I have found this to be especially true with family members, I am close with.
I really think that likeability is an emotional factor that waxes and wanes.
Indeed, there may be aspects of a person’s psychology that are not likeable. Personalities may not be compatible. There may even be a complete clash of character.
But one should ultimately make an effort to understand what the other person’s underlying intentions are.
It is easy to fall in love with a person, who has the best intentions, regardless of any other aspect of his, or her, personality.
To conclude this short article, I want to end with the awesome wisdom from this viral story:
A reporter asked the couple, “How did you manage to stay together for 65 years?” The woman replied, “We were born in a time when if something was broken we would fix it, not throw it away.”
I took away from this story, that there will be trials and tribulations in any worthy relationship.
Even if it feels like everything is at a loss, draw meaning, and grow emotional acumen.
Ultimately let the relationship evolve its own potential.
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