13 Regrets Of My Life and How You Can Avoid Them

Regrets My Life You Can Avoid Them 1

A Cautionary Tale โ€“ Oh, regrets.ย We all seem to have a few. Looking back on my life there areย manyย things I would have done differently had I been more aware of living in the present, and making changes soon enough so that my regrets in life remained minimal.

When we live in the present we are aware of the importance of self-expression and taking the time to really explore our interests and the world around us. Blessed are the people who screech into the grave,ย having lived their lives to the fullestย all the while learning, loving, building, creating, taking risks, growing and enjoying most of their life journey. It could be that there are a few apologies along the way, but kudos go to people who live presently enough to understand what is truly important to their own happiness. People that follow their own path (especially when it requires making difficult changes or decisions), tend to live with veryย few regrets.

Regrets in life are such sad, mournful things. A heavy bucket of them can pin a person down. ย  The good news is we can tweak what isnโ€™t working in our lives, and hone what is before itโ€™s too late. We can indeed lighten the weight of our buckets if we are open to suggestions.

As human beings, we seem to only learn from our own mistakes. Despite that, I have revealed a few regrets of my life here as a cautionary tale.

1. Cleaning instead of playing with my children

For some reason, I could never do anything at all, ever,ย unless I was organized andย my house was squeaky clean.ย I wouldnโ€™t leave, go outside, orย to the store.ย It was difficult for me to even play with my kids.ย I had this picture in my mind about what my house needed to look and feel like in order for me toย function as a happy mom.ย 

I had to project perfection in order to actuallyย enjoyย play time. My poor kids. Now I look back and regret notย savoringย their childhoods more. In my heart, I donโ€™t think being a slob is okay, but I knowย that most of the cleaning and organizingย fed my need for perfection.ย Children grow up fast. The house can wait.ย Trust meย when I tell you that you will have years and years ofย a clean, quiet houseย when your kids leave the nest.ย 

2. Worrying about reactions to my opinion

I always had a problem โ€œspeaking upโ€ in my life. I was afraid of offending someone or getting into an argument. I learned to keep my opinion to myself. This basically comes off as having anย empty and uninteresting personality.ย  What I have learned is that the more I know, the more confident I am speaking my mind. I have learned to respectfully express myself, and itโ€™s empowering. I regret not speaking up in given situations along the way for fear of โ€œrocking the boatโ€. The expression is a healer.ย  When we donโ€™t express ourselves and our opinions, we harbor resentment and anger. These feelings turn into regrets in life over time.

Related: Life Lessons From The Joker: What We Can Learn From The Clown Prince of Crime

3. Blaming my mother

So often, when we are riddled with problems, (as was the case with my unhappiness and my eating disorder), we look to place blame somewhere,ย on someone.ย  I went through many years of blaming my mother forย everythingย  about myself that I didnโ€™t like or couldnโ€™t control. I never asked for help or took ownership of my own behaviors. I simply sat back and rested on the crutchย of playing the blame game. Kids do not come with instructions.

My beautiful, generous mother did a fine job raising me. She wasnโ€™t perfect, but she loved me and she tried her best. She didnโ€™t deserve my wrath, my anger, or my pointed finger. We all dance in the shadow of our own upbringing and it affectsย  the way we raiseย  our own kids.ย But my mother is not at fault for the way I chose to liveย  or maskย  my pain, and I regret making her feel guilty.

4. Not traveling more

When I graduated from college, several friends of mine did some fun things. One went to Europe for a whole summer, flying by the seat of her pants, exploring every nook and cranny with just a backpack and a passport. One whole group left in two cars and simply headed out west,ย with no set plan.ย  They found jobs and settled into very different lives far from where they grew up. I moved back into my parentsโ€™ house, met a boy who lived one town over, promptly go married, and started having children. Now, of course, I love my husband and my children,ย  and I wouldnโ€™t trade them for the world, but if Iโ€™m being honest,ย I do regret not being more adventurousย and traveling more when I had no serious responsibilities and the chance.

5. Backing out of plans

In the throes of my eating disorder, and with my lifestyle in general, I could never be spontaneous. For example, because of my weight and insecurity, when the time would come to head over to aย  the party I would somehowย suddenly not feel well, or simply not want to go out and socialize. Part of myย  the disease is about isolation, and hiding. I backed out of plans at the last minute, or canceled abruptlyย all the time.ย  Itโ€™s a coping behavior, plain and simple. I regret these actions tremendously because I essentiallyย missedย  so much of the fun parts of life. When I find myself doing this now, I put a stop to it as quickly as it starts.ย Plans are for today- and tomorrow is notย  guaranteed.

Related: 7 Life Lessons We Can Learn From The 14th Dalai Lama

6. Thinking I was fat

I obsessed over being fat. I thought a size 8 was fat. I thought a size 12 was fat. Now I hover between those very sizes and I marvel over the thought that at one point in my life, I truly thought itย  meant I was fat. Along with feeling fat comes the feeling of worthlessness. The fear ofย looking fatย always haunted me. Long ago, clothing was made and tailored for each individual figure because women cameย beautifully packagedย  in all shapes and sizes. Now, if you donโ€™t fit a โ€œone size fits allโ€ ideal, youย simplyย feelย fat. At this very moment, I regret wasting so much time on this very subject.ย I regret even writing this last sentenceย because it gives the subject more time than it deserves.

7. Harboring resentment

So many of my days were spent angry, alone, and resenting a life that I alone chose to live. I wallowed inside a murky mud puddle of negativity for most of my young adult life. I blamed my mother, I was mad at my husband because he went off to work whileย  I took care of the house and kids. I resented everything and everyone around me who had what I didnโ€™t โ€“ an actualย trueย  life. Instead of confronting my feelings or changing my behaviors, I simply let the resentment pile up.ย I regret the time I wasted harboring resentment more than anyone will ever know, and more than I can ever write about.

Related: 27 Lessons I Learned In 27 Years To Stay In The Present Moment

8. Spending too much money

Money in, money out. ย Iย tend to adjust myย spending habits based on my income,ย which is foolish.ย I regret not saving money earlier in my life. Having a bit of money saved isย the foundation that freedom and stability rest upon. Like it or not, both are essential for personal happiness. Instead I squandered my money on unnecessaryย materialย things. Things purchased โ€œin the momentโ€ for instant gratification is a deep regret because they mostly consist of things I donโ€™t remember and donโ€™t have in my possession today.

9. Being overly critical of others

I tend to have a knee-jerk reaction to people and their behaviors and one of the main regrets of my life. When someone is being rude, for example, I immediately think that particular person isย  just aย total jerkย  when maybe he or she is just having a bad day.ย  It doesnโ€™t excuse the rudeness, but it does explain it to a degree.ย We all have our moments. When I see reality shows about addiction โ€“ like โ€œMy 600 pound Lifeโ€ or โ€œInterventionโ€ I am a little too quick to be disgusted.

I often think,ย what the hell is wrong with these people?ย Why canโ€™t they just change?ย But then I remember that we often criticize the weakness we see in others because we know how transparently it lurks inside us.ย I always regret choosing criticism over compassion. Criticism in this context consists of negative energy that my body, soul, and mind thrive without.

Related: 7 Examples of How Successful People Set Goals and Achieve Them

10. Not taking my makeup off before bed

Oh, the dreaded makeup removal! It takes 2 minutes, and yetย for yearsย  I simply brushed my teeth and went to bed (most nights). I regretย thisย  because itโ€™s gross, but also because it aged my skin prematurely. If you wear makeup, take that shit off before bed. Then slather on some serious โ€œnight renewal serumโ€ or some such shit and let it work its magic. Getting old sucks, but with a little routine skincare weย  can look as beautiful as we feel inside.

11. Waiting too long to put fitness first

Fitness wasnโ€™t always a part of my life. I remember being lethargic and sedentary. I waitedย way too longย to enjoy the benefits ofย simply movingย regularly.ย The biggest surprise of a solid exercise program is that the emotional benefitsย far outweighย the physical ones.ย ย Physical activity is one of the keys to a happy and productive life.ย Exerciseย changes our minds, and that it whatโ€™s needed for growth.ย 

Related: 10 Habits That Cause Low Self Esteem And Depression

12. All the things I didnโ€™tย finish

Our life tends to be filled with starts and stops. We leave so much of itย incomplete.ย My mission this year toย simplyย finish what I start.ย I proclaimedย publiclyย that I would run a half marathon, and I would actuallyย finishย writing a book. My whole life has been spent giving up when the going gets tough and I regret it.ย This year will be different because I am choosing to be different.

13. Living ungratefully

So many of us take our lives for granted, and we live as though every day is a given.ย Itย isnโ€™t. Tomorrow isย notย guaranteed. As soon as we begin to live in a way that reflects gratefulness for each new day,ย each new chance we get to become fulfilled, we start toย really seeย how beautiful our life can be.ย I regret not coming to this epiphany sooner.

Theย wonderย of regrets is that when we lay them out, we learn so much about ourselves.ย What do you regret? ย Can you make it right? Some things we canโ€™tย change because we just canโ€™t go back in time.ย But weย can certainly change ourselves and our actions moving forward in a way that reflects what weย have learned along the way.

These days, Iโ€™m grateful just to open my eyes andย begin each day with a happy heart.ย I am learning to push myself to finish what I start, andย Iโ€™m even taking my makeup off before bed!ย When Iโ€™ve got something to do,ย especially if it involves my kids orย something fun, I throw down my washcloth and walkย away from my chores. The dishes stay stacked in my sink and the laundry staysย in a dirty pile. I let it go because the moment I am seeking is happening now, andย that mundane, life-sapping shit can wait.ย 

Well, what are the regrets of your life? Share your thoughts in comments below.


Regrets Of My Life
Regrets My Life You Can Avoid Them pin

— Share —

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Up Next

6 Surprising Benefits of Gossip (Backed by Science!)

Weird But Good Benefits Of Gossip In The Workplace

Weโ€™ve all indulged in a bit of idle talk at some point? And it is usually linked with drama and negativity. But social scientists are turning the tables on this belief. Research shows that there are many benefits of gossip, especially in social groups.

From the latest celebrity drama or discussing a friendโ€™s questionable dating choices, gossip often gets a bad rap. But what if I told you that gossip isnโ€™t always toxic? 

If youโ€™re a Gen Z or millennial trying to navigate the world of social media trends, understanding the role of gossip in your life may change your perspective. Hereโ€™s why gossip might be doing more good than harm.

Read More Here:

Up Next

Winter Wellness: 10 Tips For Staying Healthy This Holiday Season

Winter Wellness Tips To Stay Healthy This Holiday Season

The holiday season is just the time to make cherished memories. But the cold can damper your plans. So, below are 10 winter wellness tips to stay healthy!

From cozy family dinners to parties with friends, the holiday season is just the time to make cherished memories. But shorter days, and bouts of sniffles can put a damper on your plans. So, below are 10 winter wellness tips to stay healthy this holiday season.

Staying healthy on holiday doesnโ€™t have to be complicated, with just a few simple but powerful winter wellness tips, you can feel the magic of the holidays while keeping your well-being at its best.

So, letโ€™s explore some unique and practical winter wellness tips that will keep you glowing inside and out!

Up Next

9 Olympic Games for All Ages: Fun for Kids, Adults, and Students

Olympic Games For All Ages Fun for Kids Adults Students

Introduce the excitement of the Olympic Games into your own home! There are so many ways to have fun with children, party for adults, or plan activities for students that mimic the Olympic spirit.

You can play imaginative and energetic games with young kids, adults can participate in competitive yet entertaining challenges, and students can take part in educational but still engaging activities โ€” there is something for everyone!

So, letโ€™s get along, laughing and having a great time with these creative and fun Olympic games for students and kids by turning any space into a

Up Next

Unsocial Media: The Real Effects Of Screen Time

Unsocial Media The Real Effects Of More Screen Time

Is social media making us less social in real life? Discover the true effects of screen time on face-to-face connections and overall well-being.

Loss of real-life interaction hampers social development.

Key points

A significant amount of real-life social interaction seems essential for the development of emotional and personal skills.

Research suggests that today’s youth has about half the exposure to critical real-life social interaction that pre-internet generations did.

Trends in poor social development among young people suggest the need for urgent attention and specific strategies to enhanc

Up Next

The Role Of ‘Resilient Mindset’ In Healing

Resilient Mindset The Healing Power Of A Positive Mindset

Does having a positive, resilient mindset support healing? Discover how hope, and balanced optimism might influence the bodyโ€™s natural ability to heal!

Can we influence our body’s ability to heal through cellular communication?

Key points

It’s important to strike the right balance of optimism, hope, belief, and realism.

A hopeful, resilient mindset could promote positive changes at the cellular level and boost healing.

There are cases of people who have been given a fatal prognosis and changed their outcome using mindset.

Up Next

Lessons Learned In Life โ€“ Let The Mind Talk Begin..

lessons learned in life 3

The landscape of life is ever changing. It brings forth different scenarios that expose us to situations that are sometimes good and sometimes bad. Life is a great teacher which helps us develop different perspectives towards it. These experiences change us daily, but it is super important that we change for being better towards our own selves and the people around us.

Up Next

How To Create A Toddler-Friendly Home: 10 Helpful Tips For New Parents!

How To Create A Toddler Friendly Home Helpful Tips 1

Bringing a toddler to your house can be both exciting and challenging. As soon as they begin taking notice of their surroundings, the environment in which they dwell must be secure, comfortable, and conducive to growth.

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

It is important to learn how to create a toddler-friendly home because this will provide them with holistic development o