A kid’s attachment style is developed in the early few years of his/her childhood. The emotional bond between a parent and a child is precious. Building a stronger emotional connection with your child will not just help create a good parent-child relationship but will also lead to them being mentally strong and help them have an emotionally healthier adult life.
To get in touch with a child’s emotions, parents need to proactively take interest and effort in a child’s day-to-day activities. You can ask your children some questions daily to know what’s going on in their little minds. This will not just help you know your kids better but will in the process help your child get in touch with their feelings which in turn helps them in developing a positive mindset.
A 2019 study showed that one in every five adults suffers from some form of mental disorder i.e almost 51.5 million of the population. 20% of young adults are or will be diagnosed with a mental health illness such as depression, anxiety, or substance abuse. In such circumstances, it becomes crucial for parents to adopt new strategies of parenting to ensure that they raise mentally strong kids, which includes asking them a few important and significant questions every day.
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Why should you ask these questions to your kids every day?
First, parents must understand why they should be asking their children these questions daily. Children require so much more than a hot meal and just a conversation when they are going to bed. They require intentionality and empathy. It is important for parents to help their children navigate their negative emotions. These questions will ultimately help your kids in developing a positive mindset towards life.
Sometimes parents may feel helpless when they have to tactfully manage their kid’s emotions. They often believe that the only way to help their kids deal with their mental health is by consulting a therapist. Even though that’s not the wrong bad approach, it is possible to directly influence your child and guide them to thrive emotionally even during challenging times.
The child must feel comfortable addressing their concerns to their parents. This is why it is crucial for parents to make them feel they can come and talk to them any time they want.
Parenting is a tricky job and it is also about accepting that you won’t always have the answers. Hence, as parents, it is important to do your research and apply all the things that can be helpful and beneficial for your child.
Developing a positive mindset is an important aspect of life. Hence it is essential to understand what mentally strong and healthy kids look like. Some of the characteristics of mentally strong kids include:
1. Feel happy and positive all the time.
2. Enjoys life.
3. Loves learning.
4. Gets along with friends and family.
5. Can manage their negative emotions.
6. Prepared to try new or challenging things.
6 Questions that Helps Children To Be In Touch With Their Emotions
1. How are you feeling today, emotionally?
Sometimes asking your child something simple as “how are you?” even when you are busy with your daily schedule can go a long way. When you show genuine interest and ask questions like “how are you feeling today, emotionally?” can help your child to feel comfortable opening up to you. It will work remarkably well if you notice them when they are feeling down or sad. It is one of the most important questions that will help your kid to develop a positive mindset.
When you are addressing their feelings and emotions, you are directly implying that you care about how they feel. It is important to make them understand that all their emotions and feelings are completely valid and it’s okay to feel the way they do. They will feel safe to share things with you when you show compassion and care for whatever they are feeling.
It is important not to assume that something is wrong. Instead of asking “what’s wrong”, allow them to share their thoughts and feelings. Tell them that you are always there for them and create a space that they feel safe in. When they open up to you, don’t listen to just respond and fix things. Instead, try listening to them in order to understand. Don’t force your opinions on them. Try saying “I’m so sorry you are going through that. I am here for you and I love you. Would you like to know what I would do?”
Related: Conscious Parenting: The Art of Raising Happy Children
2. What made you laugh today?
It is essential as a parent to know what is happening in your kid’s life during the day. It can help to ask less yes or no questions so that your child engages in the conversation. The child may not have an answer to this question every day and that is okay. Your kid should know that you care about what is happening in their lives, whether or not they are happy.
It’s important for your children to know that you care even about the little things that happen in their life, and most importantly, they care about what makes you laugh and gives you happiness.
Having an emotionally healthy relationship with your kid requires patience and understanding.
3. What are you grateful for today?
This is one of the most important questions that you can ask if you want to raise a mentally strong kid, as this helps in developing a positive mindset in them. It is important that your child knows how to appreciate the good things in life. Hence asking them about what they are grateful for every day can make them appreciate all the things they are lucky to have in their lives.
It is important to raise your kids with a fulfilled and grateful heart. It’s important not to force them but encourage them to be grateful for the things they receive every day.
You can ask your child to list out three things they are grateful for every day. They can also maintain a gratitude journal so that they can write down three things to be grateful for as a part of their daily routine. This will help your child to grow spiritually and mentally.
4. Is there anything you would like to share with us?
You may not usually ask this question every day but it may be beneficial to ask this occasionally if you feel that they are upset about something. As parents, it is essential for your kids to know that you won’t judge them and you want the best for them.
The important thing is to ensure that you create a safe space for your child so that they feel comfortable sharing the things that are bothering them.
Isn’t it better that your kid feels comfortable sharing things with you rather than hiding them from you? So in order to ensure that they do, you need to make sure that you are sensitive towards what they are saying. You can encourage them by saying “That must be really hard for you”. This will show that you are acknowledging the challenges that life is presenting to them. They need to know that it is okay to share their deepest darkest secrets, without any judgment or remarks from you.
Related: 100 Questions To Ask Your Teen Other Than “How Was School?”
5. What do you love doing that makes you feel the happiest?
Many children will answer that playing games make them feel the happiest. Studies show that there are several benefits to playing games. It even brings spouses closer when they participate and play together.
This question will direct your child’s attention to all the things that make them happy. It will make them realize that they can actively participate in the things that make them happy and joyful. In time, it will allow them to naturally look for activities, hobbies, and careers that will make them the happiest in the future.
6. What would you like to do with me today?
Children love when their parents get involved in the activities they love. When you proactively ask your kids what they would like to do with you today, they will immediately light up and be cheerful.
Asking your kids these questions will directly imply that you want to take initiative and that you are interested.
It is important to spend time with your family and make it a daily habit. This also means that you don’t check your phone in between and get distracted. It will mean the world to them even if it’s just 15 minutes of your intentional time. The best way to raise mentally strong kids is to spend your time with them.
Related: Mindful Parenting: How to Raise Kind and Conscious Teens
As parents, it is essential to inculcate the right attitude and mindset in your kids so that they can learn how to deal with challenges that may come their way. Asking the right questions every day will encourage positive behavior and also help them be mentally strong in the long run.
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