You’re too available and you need better boundaries. The realization hit me as I sat in silence on the 405 freeway. Moments earlier, I’d been listening to The Tony Robbins podcast when agitation began creeping up my spine. I cannot listen to another minute of anyone talking to me, I shuddered and hit pause. I’d been so frustrated all day. In theory, it had been a good day but I’d had a shitty attitude and I knew it. “Why do I always have to do everything? Why does it always fall on me?” I asked the silence in my car, immediately. “You need better boundaries.” Damn. I realized. It’s true. I always text back immediately. I always drop what I’m doing to help, no matter how busy I am. I almost always say yes. I’m a helper by nature. A giver, a lover, a peacemaker. But when I always say yes to everyone else, I’m saying no to myself. Always being available, bending over backward, and forgoing your own needs isn’t honorable. It’s martyrdom. Respect yourself, love.
-Alissa Jablonske
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