4. You Will Learn To Accept The Big Problem In Relationship
The fourth and final reason to not try and fix every little problem in relationship — and this brings us right back to Randy’s fateful diagnosis — is that it’ll prepare you for accepting the big problems you can do nothing about.
Letting go, like everything, is a habit. The longer you practice it, the easier it gets. Thanks to their mutual habit of acceptance, Jai and Randy didn’t waste time once they knew he only had a few months left. They didn’t flounder like fish on land, trying to fight the inevitable by getting hung up on little spats.
Instead, they were 100% focused on the big picture: Spend time with family, cement Randy’s legacy, and prepare for when he’d be gone. Don’t fix the small dilemmas so you may gracefully accept the ones you can’t. **
The story above is a real story. It happened to real people, and it had real consequences. Randy told it in his book The Last Lecture, a book he was able to write, in part, because his wife forgave him for not hanging up his khakis.
In it, among many other wonderful things, he said:
I wish I had more time to help Jai realize other dreams. But the kids are a spectacular dream fulfilled, and there’s great solace in that for both of us.
When Jai and I talk about the lessons she has learned from our journey, she talks about how we’ve found strength in standing together, shoulder to shoulder. She says she’s grateful that we can talk, heart to heart. And then she tells me about how my clothes are all over the room and it’s very annoying, but, all things considered, she’s giving me a pass.
Don’t try to fix every problem in relationship. Let go of the little troubles so you can learn to love your partner as they are — and tackle your biggest challenges together.
Written by: Niklas Goeke niklasgoeke.com is where people can sign up. Originally appeared on: P.S. I Love You Republished with permission