However, if your bully is actually a narcissist, they’ll rarely follow the acceptable chain of command when they have an idea to share or a complaint to register.
They do not view the people immediately above them as special or worthy enough to appreciate their input. Customarily, they prefer to go directly to the top regardless of how it should be structured.
Unfortunately, they will only take you seriously when you employ a disciplinary process. The uncivil employee may occasionally leapfrog the chain of command, but they will stop if the appropriate structure is restated.
It is unusual for an individual who engages in disruptive narcissistic behavior to self-correct without intervention by leadership. Coaching and training aimed at affecting and adjusting behavior take time and patience.
However, sustainable change will not happen unless the disruptive person can actually acknowledge that his or her actions are inappropriate and potentially harmful.
Furthermore, this acknowledgment must be followed by clear evidence that the desired changes in behavior can be sustained.
Uncivil individuals have the ability to acknowledge a shortcoming and make an active choice to adopt a better way of conducting themselves at work. Change may not happen overnight but it can happen.
Narcissists may be unable or unwilling to make this change in their workplace behavior because they lack this ability. Narcissists are challenged by any boundaries and are compelled to push back rather than admit fault.
Since they lack the insight necessary to identify the need for a change, they’re unable to sustain any claim they make to embrace a better way. A bully’s behavior is predictable and cyclical, and it’s important to identify if they’re making a significant attempt to change or if they’re set in their ways.
It could be the difference between someone behaving poorly and a narcissist in the workplace.
Written by Phyllis Quinlan Originally appeared in YourTango