Why I Haven’t Looked At Myself In A Mirror For Months

Why I Haven't Looked At Myself In A Mirror For Months

It’s been seven months since I’ve seen a full-body reflection of myself. I do use a compact mirror to apply my make-up and fix my hair on the rare occasions it’s needed. But I don’t look myself in the eye while doing these things.

I only leave my house to go to therapy and the yoga studio. But this is extremely difficult since a yoga studio has at least one full wall of mirrors. I get around that mirrored wall by waiting until the room is almost full, then ducking into the back row and positioning myself so I can’t see more than a sliver reflection of my arm or leg.

Will This Effect of Narcissistic Abuse Be Part of My Future?

As I mentioned, I am again in therapy for this debilitating effect.  My therapist and I are discussing ways to get back to living fully.  Which means, not avoiding my own reflection.  At the time of this post, I am not there yet.

My therapist has recently been discussing Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), also known as the Tapping Technique, as a tool we can use to reprogram my mind from the fear I feel of seeing my reflection and looking myself in the eye.  We have concluded that the reason behind this fear is the self-hatred I feel for getting involved with the narcissistic man again.

Honestly, at this point, I’m willing to try ANYTHING.

This man’s behavior is so foreign to me that I can’t forgive myself for being involved with someone so cruel.  The cruelty has literally changed my DNA in a way I might never completely heal from.

The effects of Narcissistic Abuse have been proven to do actual brain damage.

Closing thoughts on why I haven’t looked at myself in the mirror for months.

First, let me say thank you for reading this personal story.  It was difficult to admit in such a public way.  But, if it touches just one person by sharing this, it will be worth it.

Secondly, if you or someone you know is a victim of Narcissistic Abuse seek professional help.

I don’t want anyone to end up like me- the way I haven’t looked at myself in the mirror.

So now you know why I haven’t looked at myself in the mirror for months.


You may also like:

Why I Haven't Looked At Myself In A Mirror For Months
Why I Haven’t Looked At Myself In A Mirror For Months

Share on

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to Top