5 Reasons Being Yourself Is The Best Way To Find Love

best way to finding love

Many people have a hard time believing that being yourself is the best way to succeed at finding love. But I assure you, being yourself is the key to finding lasting happiness in a relationship.

Why they think, would someone want to fall in love with them? They don’t think themselves smart enough or hot enough or funny enough. It’s hard to imagine that anyone would ever want them. So, they create for themselves someone else, someone else they believe will be more lovable, and they put that person out there – hoping to find love.

Unfortunately, not being yourself is definitely not the best way to succeed at finding love because it will sabotage you in so many ways. Let me share with you 5 reasons why not being yourself will ensure that you fail at finding love.

Related: 12 Signs You Are Losing Yourself In Your Relationship

5 Reasons Being Yourself Is The Best Way To Find Love

1. Being Yourself Is Natural.

Being yourself is the easiest thing in the world to do. You have been yourself for decades, and you can do you like no one else can.

Not being yourself takes work. Not being yourself, presenting yourself as someone else, making conscious decisions to do things differently, all require a tremendous amount of energy. It takes keeping on top of the lies that you might be telling. It takes maintaining a façade of who you are not. It takes hiding things from your new person, all the while doing the very difficult task of trying to find love.

And, if you are working so hard at being someone other than you are, you will have a hard time finding the love you seek because it’s hard to do both at the same time.

2. You Will Doom The Relationship From The Start.

Even if you find love by not being yourself, you won’t be able to keep it.

Imagine you meet someone and they are everything that you had hoped they would be. You fall in love and you look forward to living happily ever after. And then you learn the truth about them. How would you feel?

I have a client who met a wonderful guy and they had a summer romance. He made her laugh, and the sex was great, and she had hopes for the future. As their time together progressed, she noticed that he didn’t seem to have much professional work to do. He spent his time working on his boat and with her, but he never talked about what he did, and he definitely didn’t have money for dinners out.

She repeatedly asked him about this because she wasn’t comfortable with him not working and her having to pay for dinners. He was vague and put her off. Eventually, she got fed up with the whole thing and pulled the plug. He wasn’t the person she thought he was and she moved on.

So, while you might find love by not being yourself, you won’t be able to keep it!

3. Honesty Is The Key To Any Relationship.

One of the most important parts of any relationship is honesty – without it, there is no trust, and a relationship will fail. If you start a relationship off not being yourself, you will be violating the trust of your partner by not being honest.

In the case of my client, she felt like her boyfriend had done a bait and switch – that he had sucked her in presenting himself as a successful businessman, when in fact, he did what he had to do to pay his bills but that was it.

She does love this man and he has promised her that he will find more work, but their relationship has been tarnished because she no longer trusts him the way that she would like to.

So, the best way to succeed at finding love is by being yourself because honesty is the basis of every healthy relationship, and that’s what you want – a healthy relationship.

Related: How Happy and Healthy Is Your Relationship? Quiz

4. You Will Feel Better About Yourself.

To deem that who you are is not good enough to be loved, and you must therefore be someone else, sucks the life out of you. It’s very hard to put yourself out there as someone who you are not and to feel good about yourself.

How can you, if you are pretending to be someone you are not, feel good about yourself? How can you look yourself in the mirror and not judge yourself? How can you not walk in after a date and wonder how you are going to keep this up? How will you feel if your person falls in love with someone who doesn’t exist?

And how can you be attracted to someone who doesn’t feel good about themselves? If your self-esteem is low because you aren’t being yourself, you are going to have a hard time attracting the kind of person you want to be with. Being yourself in a relationship is the best way to keep your self-esteem intact and be attractive to the kind of person you want to be attractive to.

5. You Will Keep Your Friends.

This might seem like an odd one, but one of the biggest consequences of not being yourself is that you might lose your friends.

How many times have you, or one of your friends, changed to get or keep a relationship? How frustrating is it to watch them be someone other than who they are, for some girl or some guy? How quickly do you get sick of it and stop hanging out with them and respecting them?

If you want to keep your friends, I would encourage you to be yourself when you are looking for love. You need those friends. They were there before you meet your person and they will be there long after if the relationship ends.

I know that it’s hard for some people to believe that being yourself is the best way to succeed at finding love.

Related: 21 Things That Change When You Start Respecting Yourself

But being yourself is the best way to find happiness, not only in a relationship but in the world. Being yourself is natural and you are good at it. You will doom the relationship from the start if it’s based on a lie. You can’t have a healthy relationship without honesty. Your self-esteem will plummet, and you won’t be as attractive to others, and you could lose your friends in the whole messy process.

Be yourself. Always. You will be glad you did!


Being Yourself Best Way Succeed Finding Love Pin
best way to finding love pin

— About the Author —

Leave a Reply



Up Next

What is a Trophy Husband In Today’s Relationship Dynamics?

Signs of a Trophy Husband: Exploring Modern Masculinity

Most of us are aware of the term “trophy wife”. But have you heard about a “trophy husband”? It is a somewhat new term that is a gender-swapped version of the more popular concept of “trophy wife”. 

In today’s evolving society, where gender roles are constantly being redefined, there’s a rising trend of trophy husbands. These men are not only eye-catching companions but also possess qualities that make them desirable partners. 

Today, let us explore this fascinating concept and understand what is a trophy husband,  the signs to look for, why being a trophy husband is exhausting, and the potential issues that can arise in relationships with them.

What is a Trophy Husband?



Up Next

Feeling Like Roommates In A Marriage? 7 Signs Of Roommate Syndrome And What You Can Do To Change That

Feeling Like Roommates In A Marriage? Signs Spark Is Gone

Are you feeling like roommates in a marriage? You know, that sinking feeling when you realize the spark has fizzled, and your relationship has become more about paying bills and coordinating schedules than love and connection.

The thing is, roommate syndrome is more common than you think, and many couples face this, after being together for a long time. When you are in the roommate phase of a relationship, you might ask yourself why and when the romance disappeared or if you’re both just pretending to be happy.

But that might not be the case. In this article, we are going to look at what is roommate syndrome, the signs of roommate syndrome, and how to deal with roommate syndrome, so that you stop feeling like roommates in a marriage.

So, let’s get started, shall we?



Up Next

Am I In Love Or Just Experiencing Limerence? 5 Signs To Look For

Limerence vs Love? Signs That Differ From True Love

Are you head over heels for somebody or have you plummeted into limerence? Learn the distinction between limerence vs love to make sure that your romantic bond doesn’t turn into a serious addiction.

Limerence is a psychological state that can leave you feeling exhilarated but confused. This state isn’t just another word for love. It has unique properties that differ limerence vs love.

What is limerence vs love?

In simpler words, limerence in a relationship when someone is madly in love with another person. So much so that it affects their mindset and they can’t think of anything else but him/her.

It might not seem too different from love.



Up Next

8 Ways To Upgrade Your Relationship

Ways To Upgrade Your Relationship

Do you feel like your relationship has lost that spark from before? If you answered yes, then you should know that many couples go through this, which is why it’s important to know how to improve your relationship. This article is going to talk about how to strengthen your relationship and upgrade your relationship.

It seems like it should be natural to treat our partners with love, consideration, and respect. Yet, for many people in long-term relationships, the warmth and kindness that were present in the early days of dating can fade over time.

Most people treat their partners with the utmost respect and kindness in the courting stage. The relationship probably wouldn’t have progressed if they hadn’t. Why do so many people present the best version of themselves early on, and over time, treat their beloved partners with disrespect, di



Up Next

5 Ways To Rekindle The Spark In Your Relationship

Ways To Rekindle The Spark In Your Relationship

If you feel that the spark in your relationship is gone, then let me tell you something – you can rekindle the spark in your relationship again! Now the question is, how to reignite the spark in your relationship? How can you make your relationship feel like the olden days again? Let’s find out!

Remember the feelings you experienced when you first started dating your spouse or partner? Perhaps you felt excitement, attraction, and anticipation? As the relationship has progressed, has it been difficult to maintain those initial feelings?

Once life’s responsibilities, careers, kids, and the passing of time are added to the mix, that initial spark can easily diminish if we don’t keep it stoked.

Fortunately



Up Next

How To Deal With Your Partner’s Obsessive Ex? 4 Tips For Successfully Handling One

Deal With Your Partner's Obsessive Ex: Tips And Tricks

Have you ever had to deal with an obsessive ex? Moreover, have you ever had to deal with your partner’s obsessive and toxic ex? If you have, you already know how disturbing it is to go through this. This article is going to talk about some of the best ways to deal with a toxic ex or deal with your partner’s toxic ex.

My friend is happily married to a man who has a child. He is a devoted and loving father who sought full custody of the children; the court denied his petition.

His two children are living with their narcissistic mother who actively alienates the children from their father. His ex was obsessed with him during their short and turbulent relationship. She was deceitful, abusive, controlling, and highly destructive. They hooked up while drunk.



Up Next

Are You Hesitant To Commit? 6 Warning Signs Of Lack Of Commitment In A Relationship And How To Navigate Them

Signs of Lack of Commitment in a Relationship: Red Flags

Do you always find yourself in short-term, casual relationships? Does the idea of committing in a relationship make you nervous? Are you showing signs of lack of commitment in a relationship?

Commitment issues can be a significant barrier to building a healthy and fulfilling partnership, affecting both individuals involved. Today, let us explore what are commitment issues, the signs that may indicate their presence, the underlying causes of commitment issues, and effective strategies to overcome them.

By understanding these factors, you can empower yourself to navigate the complexities of relationships with greater confidence and clarity.

Are You Afraid of Commitment?