Why am I surprised that my path would lead me here?
Lately I have allowed myself to be distracted. sitting in front of my computer watching news feed video and reading news feed print. We are not talking 20 – 30 minutes here. We are talking hours, everything from CNN to Fox, NYTimes to WSJ, and everything in between
I am amazed, it watches like a reality show, .The backdrop is Washington DC and there is never a shortage of players or eventful drama. It has taken a bit of time to get used to how blatantly open they are and then the story that of course we believe and it gets swept under the rug.
Anyway, that isn’t what I am wanting to talk about. I was surfing the web when I stumbled on this web site. The first title that crossed my mind was Talking about Black Magic, good and bad witches. Then the empathy article,numerology. About now I am getting all excited. Like OMG there is everything I am about right here in this one web site. I am stoked.
I have been in the dumps, thinking maybe it was just the holiday blues. It is the first Christmas without my mom. I have had a hard time trying to get back on track after her passing in May.
The past year and a half there has been more change in my life than in the rest of my 65 years on the planet. I had been fighting with myself for some time. I was in my comfort zone. In a career , food service 50+ years. I finally conceded , quit my job, retired, and set out to pursue my passion to write. I don’t believe in coincidence. Everything happens for a reason.
I was beginning to wonder if I had done the right thing as my life took another unexpected change as I had to find a new place to live. The apartment that I had lived in for 15 years was sold and the new owners were making things impossible to to live there. I didn’t think to much of it I was in the process of buying a trailer. I thought to myself it’s all good things are going smooth this must be what I am suppose to be doing. Well, think again Nick. at the last minute the deal fell through.
I’m starting to worry now. with no place to live I was lucky I had my truck with a camper shell.That would buy me some time.My cat wasn’t any too happy. I learned pretty quick cats are not like dogs when it comes to traveling in a moving vehicle.
I found an apartment. Okay, everything is groovy now. Thinking I was planning to move in a week later. so I thought I would go up to Prescott Valley and hang out with my cuz. I came back to Phoenix a week later.only to find that the apartment I was to move into would not be ready for another month. I am now no longer cool I am livid. Ranting like a crazy man. I am surprised they let me move in. I am not sharing these things that you would feel sorry for me. I don’t want a pity party.
I am trying to illustrate how circumstances are leading me in the direction that I am suppose to be going. If the truth be known my stubbornness to fight change made it more problematic then it needed to be. What is that old saying ” We can’t see the forest through the trees” . We only see the small snippet of the big picture called our life. I know I am constantly reminded that I am not making this journey alone. The one that gave me life has been watching over my life. As I can recall many times to bring me to where I am today.
If I can in closing leave you with a thought. I am not a shining example of perfection and I don’t adhere to the conventional theology of the day, but I do know one thing for certain I had an experience in the year 1971 that i can not deny and no one can convince me otherwise. Sitting in the living room of the house I lived in. My room mate weren’t there so I was enjoying the private time. I noticed on the end table my bible that I got when I became a confirmed Methodist. I hadn’t picked it up in years. Why I did on this occasion I don’t know I was compelled I guess. I didn’t know what I wanted to read so I opened it to the first book of the New Testament, Matthew 1;1. I got to the Sermon on the Mount. I don’t recall the chapter and verse, but I can recite the verse that came to life on the page. “Blessed are the Peace Makers for they shall be called the Children of God.” At that moment, it is hard to describe it. English doesn’t do it justice. As I watched the words dancing on the page the room filled with the presence of God and I began to cry. I felt myself fall on my face and with whimpering word all I could say is OH MY GOD YOU ARE REAL!
THough the good times and the bad, my God has carried me through. I thank you for the opportunity to share my story .
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