When You Wonder If People Don’t Like You: 3 Things To Consider

when you wonder if people dont like you

3. Check Your Arrogance Level

Do you pause long enough to allow people to respond to your thoughts, views, and opinions, or do you ride roughshod over others’ sensibilities? Do you take up all the space in a conversation? Do you quickly dismiss what’s not harmonious with your pre-existing beliefs? Is it possible that they’re seeing something that you’re not?

Are you convinced that you’re always right? Are you strong enough to acknowledge that you’re wrong sometimes and to allow yourself to be influenced by others’ viewpoints? Do you cling to a rigid mindset that prevents you from changing your mind?

Arrogance is off-putting and might be contributing to your isolation. Recognizing that you could be wrong is the beginning of wisdom. Humility is attractive.

arrogance is used by weak

Everyone wants to feel that their feelings, longings, and humanity matter. If you can find the resilience to extend caring attention to others and honor their experience, you might find that people are naturally inclined to like you.

Try to find a harmonious balance between giving and receiving. Listen carefully and reflect back a bit of what you’re hearing. You might find that people love it, just as you do.

The path toward being liked isn’t shrouded in mystery. It often comes down to being kind, caring, and empathic toward people and experiencing ourselves as a part of the human condition, rather than someone who is special or better than others. All the great spiritual traditions teach us to love one another. Genuine spiritual leaders are loved because they loved us.

If we can reach inside ourselves and extend even a small amount of caring, gentleness, and responsiveness toward others, we’re likely to find they appreciate us for doing so, even if we don’t do it perfectly. In fact, people feel threatened by perfect people, so pretending we’re perfect is counterproductive. If we take the risk to honor and extend our imperfect self, we might be pleasantly surprised by the positive response we receive.

Written by:John Amodeo
Originally appeared on: Psychology Today 
You may access John's free online articles with Psychology Today and check out his books by visiting his website: www.johnamodeo.com
Republished with permission 
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