What is a Narcissist ? A Primer for the Lay Person on Narcissism

 November 25, 2016

What is a Narcissist ? A Primer for the Lay Person on Narcissism



Someone who is NPD or beyond on the above spectrum engages in emotional abuse tactics, which I have written about extensively in my blog and for goodtherapy.org . Also in my ebook Soul Vampires: Reclaiming Your LIfeBlood After Narcissistic Abuse 

So I work with the survivors of narcissistic abuse. I work with the woman or man who suffered in a romantic relationship with a narcissist who emotionally abused them. I provide therapy for the person who is dealing with a tyrannical boss. I counsel the adult child of a narcissistic parent who doesn’t feel like they will ever amount to anything worthy. I support the survivor of sexual abuse, rape, or persecution of any shape or form by a malignant narcissist/psychopath. I provide therapy for the individual who was emotionally abused by a pastor who is running a cult in her community, the man whose therapist tried to sexually assault him. All of the perpetrators in the above scenarios were at minimum NPD and at worst, psychopaths…and NO ONE is immune from being a target. In fact, toxic pathological people actually seek out intelligent, beautiful, altruistic, highly empathic people because the narcissist is lacking in those very qualities andthey want to consume that person like a vampire to fill their empty void of a psyche (Schneider, 2015). The target of a narcissist generally serves as the “mirror” to the ego of the narcissist, providing fuel to the narcissist to inflate their ego (attention, appreciation, adulation, sex, disgust, reactions of any kind all serve as forms of narcissistic supply). A malignant narcissist/psychopath will attempt to extract narcissistic supply from their targets in a premeditated fashion, preferably by causing harm and pain to their victims. An extreme narcissist/psychopath is a sadist. They get pleasure by causing pain.

People heal from narcissistic abuse. But it is hard work. And it takes a good amount of time, with a skilled, trained, ethical, trauma-informed psychotherapist. Healing is very complex but very possible. I have had the honor and privilege of bearing witness to many survivors move into a place of thriving in their lives — when they reclaimed their power and pulled some very persnickety weeds…their garden of life opened up to new, healthy growth and healing. I am one lucky woman to be able to see before my very eyes that kind of personal strength and fortitude that my clients near and far manifest as they heal. The saying, “sometimes things fall apart before they can be reassembled” is very apropos. And in the reassembly, the new construction of healing often times generates an even healthier and more whole person, thriving in the new chapter of their life.


Follow her blog Andrea Schneider to read more 

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