Want to know more about setting boundaries with a man? This video will help you in setting boundaries with a man, the right way:
3. Know your expectations and requirements for personal time and space.
Personal time and space can be tricky. I’m really surprised more couples don’t actually talk about space more often.
After all, if you don’t know what your expectations are here, you could find yourself in a lot of awkward arguments.
How much space you need and how much “me time” do you need?
You’ve got to know what each one of you thinks is the ideal amount of time to spend together as well as the time you need apart.
Back when you were in high school, yeah, sure you can ditch school and make out on a couch all day long. OK, maybe I might have done that one once or twice too. But as grownups, we know what our limits are.
You know when you need that ‘me time’ to get the grocery shopping done and hang out with your kids or head to the gym and you’ve got a real life to manage?
Your guy might not have the same obligations or needs that you do or vice versa.
Be upfront about your needs so that you both know what time you have together and what time you need apart. Misunderstandings are usually caused by one person not wanting to rock the boat so they stay silent.
They don’t want to chance messing up this new romance.
Here’s a really important fact for you.
People don’t usually walk away from a relationship because the other person has healthy boundaries. They walk away because the communication of the boundaries wasn’t done well and now there’s conflict, misunderstandings, and confusion. And most of the time, it’s because those relationship boundaries were set too late.
Communication. Did that word just trigger a whole bunch of stuff for you?
Communication is the trickiest part of dating with men and for guys, that are dating women.
Hands down, it’s the most complicated part.
And it’s not because guys are particularly complicated in how they talk about things, we just communicate it in a much different way than women do which feels very confusing because it seems to be coming from a completely different way of thinking.
I used to feel the same way about women until I wrote a few good books on the topic of communication and how women think versus how men think and so on.
And you know what?
I rarely find myself confused about it now. But this doesn’t mean I haven’t had my moments but for the most part, I get how men and women go wrong when they’re communicating.
That’s why I got into this whole dating advice gig.
Remember that boundaries are not meant to be empty threats or harsh limits that you set that make you feel uncomfortable.
Boundaries are clear, loving, firm words we say to assert our needs. Your boundaries tell him how you want to be treated in life and in love.
On the first date, be willing to establish any boundaries around conversation topics, like sex, previous relationships, or anything that’s too intimate too soon. That’s how you set that particular boundary right off the bat.
5. Getting physical.
The physical part of your relationship is probably the toughest part to set a boundary around but it has to be done as soon as you can.
The first date is not too soon to talk about it, and this is the place you have to. Especially when physical intimacy comes up on the first date, it needs to be addressed right away.