At the end of that year, the question is: Now what?
Since money is no object, and you’ve got all your worldly desires out of the way, how would you spend the rest of your days?
This is where you can start to more clearly see what you ultimately care about, and what your heart really wants to do with your limited time on this planet.
As you go, what you actually end up doing over the years might look different, or you may also be committed to several different things over your lifetime. But this exercise can help crystallize the deepest values that will underpin all of those missions and projects.
Once you connect with this North Star, you feel engaged in a personally meaningful hero’s journey. Your purpose switches from acquiring all the “things” and checking the boxes that society taught you to check – like a drone in a hive – to expressing your unique potential to its fullest and serving the world in a way that only you can.
2. Bring Important Things To Completion
Wrapped up in the pursuit of purpose is the virtue of accomplishment.
Next to knowing your direction, a major essence of confidence comes from being effective and skillful and believing in your capacity to get things done. This comes from finishing things – whether that’s small tasks, big projects, or tough conversations with people.
When you do something as simple as clean your room, or purge unneeded clothes, or finish a home/work assignment, it’s a small demonstration of being in control and responsible in your life.
Your brain gives you the same reward chemicals for finishing these tasks as it would for making your first sale in a business, or building a house and that helps you build confidence. The difference is that the more work and effort you put in on the front end, the bigger the mental and emotional payoffs will be.
If you start looking around at your life, you will notice piles of half-baked in-progress messes that are waiting to be tidied. These are usually created due to a passive attitude toward life, being overly distracted, or the lack of mental discipline to see things through all the way.
It’s the way a lazy, entitled prince would operate, rather than a mature and passionate king. And “king energy” is the final frontier of what a man needs to develop in order to feel like his greatest, most confident self.
All that unfinished business in life is a great place to start looking because attacking them begins to build internal momentum and self-respect, which plugs up the leaks that drain your sense of confidence and put you in a better headspace to explore and experiment with your North Star.
Right now, you can do something as simple as compiling a list of each and everything you have to do. What work is waiting to be completed? What have you been putting off? What errands need to be run? What needs to be fixed?
Those questions apply equally to physical labor as they do to our relationships.
Unfinished conversations with other people in our lives have the same effect as having a messy home and procrastinating on work. We avoid directly addressing unsaid thoughts and feelings with friends, family, and co-workers because we fear the discomfort of facing things head-on, and moving forward.