I guarantee you will get a different response from him.
The magic word…feel. When communicating with a man you’re involved with, watch how his responses to you change when you start telling him how his actions make you feel. Since, as we discussed earlier, he wants to make you happy – knowing he is making you feel a different way will wake him up and understand the situation better. It will sound more collaborative rather than combative. It will give him direction rather than cut him off at the knees. It will make him feel like you are communicating with him, rather than pointing out his flaws.
This may sound basic, simple, or even a little bit ridiculous – but it is accurate. When men say we are simple creatures, we really do mean it. We want to make you happy, but sometimes we need a little help and patience in figuring out how to do it.
So, next time you have a disagreement or a ‘talk’ that needs to be had with the man in your life, if you typically find he is closed off to hearing your point of view when you are trying to get him to change or improve the way he does something, take the focus off of what he is (or isn’t) doing, and start putting the focus on how his actions make you feel.
See how the conversation goes, then.
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Originally appeared on JamesMichael Sama.com
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