An important question is, how does this person deal with conflict and how long does it take them to open up if they do close in the face of conflict?
Since none of us enter relationships fully healed, it is very important to know that your partner is willing to explore conflict, rather than just protect against it with controlling behavior.
Conflict occurs in all relationships, and if both people are not open to learning about themselves and each other within the conflict, the unresolved conflicts will eventually destroy the relationship.
If you are a person who is open to learning and wants a relationship in order to share love, there are three essential ingredients that need to be present for the person to be the right person for you:
- There needs to be a basic spark of attraction. If you do not feel physically attracted to this person within the first six months of the relationship, the chances are this attraction will not develop.
- Each of you needs to be capable of caring, compassion, empathy, and acceptance for who each of you are.
- Both of you need to be open to learning in conflict, rather than just wanting to win and be right.
Other ingredients, such as common interests and values, are also important, but without the above three ingredients, they will not sustain the relationship.
The typicality of getting butterflies in your stomach the very moment you find Mr. Right may not be very far from the truth. there are signs, identify them, learn them and adopt them.
My Two cents on this, If you’re usually depressed in your relationship, you’re probably in the wrong one. However, if you’re feeling super happy and very optimistic than usual with this man around in your life, then he might be “the one.”
Pay attention to your intuition, Your intuition can be a strong indicator of who’s right for you and who’s not. Remember, it’s not always about whether He is the right one or not. A truly loving relationship is between two people truly in love and accepts each other in all respect.
There’s a scene in Annie Hall in which Diane Keaton and Woody Allen are laughing at something. Later he makes the same joke with another woman but she doesn’t get it. If every time you tell a joke, he says, “I don’t get it,” he never will.
Stay Happy with Your Mr. Right, Much Love.
Written By Dr. Margaret Paul
Printed With Permission
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