Why weren’t you there?
why didn’t you care?
the look in your eyes,
and the unnerving stare,
was i a stranger?
undeserving of a father,
did i not deserve a happy home?
no need for acts of kindness?
the odd compliment or word of praise?
it seems now, with my own child truly hurtful,
and the exact opposite of how i choose to raise,
special occasions, longed for outings should be good times,
a trip out, special event or a place,
you wouldn’t stop till your bullying insults,
had wiped the smile of my scared little face,
even worse was it was your role to protect me,
shelter and keep me from harm,
yet you turned into the worst kind of abuser,
and my safe place was the last place i felt calm,
just more and more angry shouting,
at this sad and always fearful little girl,
yet i should have been your princess,
the apple of your eye, your world,
but then what was i to you…nothing?
not the boy you wanted is that what you thought?
exempt from the father figure lessons,
a loving relationship would have taught,