9 Steps That’ll Help You Love Yourself Better

Steps Help Love Yourself Enough

All of it needed to go! This takes time, however. It’s not something that changes from one day to the next, but it can be changed. I looked at it as a trait and not a state, therefore it could be changed. I wrote down my core beliefs and changed them to reflect positive ones to change the junk I was telling myself.

Related: 10 Every Day Must Do’s To Make You Love Yourself Better

5. Taking care of all parts of myself

For me, this meant not only looking at my physical body but my emotional, mental, and spiritual sides of me. It’s all interconnected after all. I was always a very physically fit person. I remember being called “diesel” in middle school and throughout high school because I was very active.

I hated that name, but taking care of myself physically was important. It wasn’t until last year, after a car accident, that I was forced to look at other parts of myself. I had practiced yoga for a few years and loved it, but for me, it was just another physical activity. Another thing I needed to master. After my accident, I couldn’t run anymore which was my passion – and lifting weights – forget about it! It was too painful. I played “victim” for a while but as my friends and clients will confirm, I believe that things happen for a reason.

We have free will of course but when there is something we need to look at, within ourselves, the signs get stronger. I still struggle with pain today but I keep moving. So pay attention to repetitive thoughts or things various people tell you. Maybe you have been recommended a certain book from several people or have an annoying little voice telling you to go work out or eat healthier. If so, there’s something there for you. Something you need to listen to.

I now practice yoga for balance as opposed to it being a contest (with myself), I eat healthier to clear my body of toxins, and I cry when I need to. I allow myself to feel what hurts and then move on as opposed to moving on and acting like I never hurt in the first place. I write – which let me tell you is not the norm for me. Even as I write this I am feeling vulnerable and that is not who I have been. Ever. However, I am working through it as it is a part of my journey.

I learned about energy healing work to help myself with balancing my energy centers and working through deeper issues. Oh, how I’ve fallen in love with energy healing work. I also allow myself to recharge – alone. I’ve found that as an empath, and due to the nature of my job, I need to be alone to release and reconnect. I now give myself “recharge” days and don’t feel guilty for it any longer.

6. Cutting my friends list

This was a big one for me and super difficult! I was always someone who had plenty of friends and not enough time to spend with them all. Why? Well, I always said yes. I’d also like to think I was pretty fun to be around, as was confirmed on several occasions, but I realized most of my yes’ on invitations were out of guilt. I didn’t really want to go but I felt that had I said no, I would not be loved anymore. 

Over the past two years, I’ve done a lot of work as to figuring out who I want in my life and how. I began to set boundaries. I reduced time spent with those that were too negative, in my eyes, and just brought me down as well as those that only wanted to stop by my office, text me, or spend time with me when they needed to solve a personal issue.

I began to surround myself with those that truly loved me for who I was. Those that I could truly be myself around and not feel judged. I released those from my life that I constantly sought out but it always seemed to be one-sided. If it wasn’t reciprocated, then they were released.

Now don’t get me wrong, life is crazy busy – especially for me – so I know that spending time with a friend may happen monthly at best. Probably bimonthly or longer for me (I did tell you I was trying to change the world earlier right?), but if I’m the only one initiating then you’ve got to go. It’s clear where I stand and that’s not acceptable for me any longer.

Related: 60+ Carl Jung Quotes On Finding Yourself

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