4 – Distance
When your husband walks in the door would your first instinct be to hug him? If you could choose someone to go to the movies with, would it be your wife?
Is the first person you want to tell your good news to the person you go to sleep with every night?
Over time, as marriage evolves, couples become so comfortable with each other that we take each other for granted. Hugs, confidences, and free time are things that aren’t always a part of long marriages.
That being said, if there is a distance between you and your spouse that is more like a chasm, if you never touch each other, never spend free time together and if you would rather die than share anything personal, then you are in a toxic marriage.
People who are in healthy marriages make an effort to be physical with their partner. They genuinely enjoy spending their free time together (mostly) and confide in each other wins and losses in their life.
Consider the distance between you and your spouse. If the Grand Canyon comes to mind then you are most likely in a toxic marriage.
5 – Silence
One of the biggest signs of a toxic marriage is silence.
Silence means lack of communication. Silence means grudges are being held and being left unsaid. Silence means that connecting in any meaningful way is impossible.
The hallmark of a healthy relationship is when two people can communicate well. Whether its about what is for dinner, what your mother in law did last weekend or the fact that they have pissed you off again, communication is what keeps people connected.
When communication stops, so does any chance for a happy relationship. The silence that is left in it’s place is a petri dish wherein disconnection, anger and resentment can grow. Words go left unsaid and frustrations stew.
When was the last time you and your partner spoke in any meaningful way? When you spend time together is there any kind of communication at all or are you sharing the space in silence? If you and your partner are no longer talking, about anything, including the weather, then you are most likely in a toxic marriage.
Recognizing signs of a toxic marriage is the best way to try to save it before it gets too late.
Do you and your partner treat each other well? Do you disagree about things without fighting? Do you keep secrets or your distance? Have you stopped communicating in any meaningful way?
If any or all of these things are true, you very well might be in a toxic marriage, one you want to either start working on or get out of.
Don’t waste your life in a toxic marriage – life is too short to waste!
You may also like:
- What To Do If You Have An Unhappy Marriage But Are Afraid To Leave
- 3 Ways To Escape An Unhappy Marriage Without Getting a Divorce
- 4 Marriage Myths That Cause Divorce