How to deal with overachievement
If you can identify with most of the signs of an overachiever mentioned above, then there are certain things you can do to deal with it.
Here are a few steps that will help you to succeed and accomplish goals without affecting your health, well-being, relationships, and life.
1. Step back and question yourself
Goals are important. But it is also important to know why they are important. As you become driven by your fear of failure, ask yourself what’s the worst that can happen if you can’t accomplish this goal. Do you really care that much about it? Is this a realistic goal?
“While it may not change your mind about pursuing your objective, it may help you gain a bit of perspective about why you are chasing this goal,” writes Kendra Cherry, MS.
2. Learn to accept failure
Failure is not necessarily a bad thing. It can be an excellent learning experience that can take you another step closer to success. Failure can teach you things success never can. Once you learn to accept the bitterness of failure and the joy of overcoming it, you will be more likely to navigate through different obstacles in life. Having the ability to get back up after getting knocked down will make you more resilient and more likely to succeed.
3. Focus on the process, not the outcome
If you want to overcome your tendency for overachievement, then you need to carefully understand the difference between overachievement and high performance. Unlike overachievers, high performers focus more on their performances and achieving their goals as opposed to avoiding failure. For over achievers, it’s product over process. However, for high performers, it’s process over product. So if you wish to cope with your habit to overachieve, then you need to shift your mindset and focus on the process instead of the product.
Kendra Cherry writes “Success does not just mean finishing on time or ticking certain tasks off a list. Instead, it is all about the journey itself, how well the project turns out, and how much they learn along the way.”
4. Do what makes you happy
Instead of running after your next promotion or giving up everything to be more successful, focus on what actually matters to you. Instead of trying to impress and please others do what enriches your soul and makes you happy. “Check in with what really makes you happy,” explains Amanda Smear Baudier, Yoga instructor and founder or The Social Sutras.
5. Build your relationships
The habit of overachievement can take a heavy toll on your relationships. But now you need to stop letting your relationships suffer due to your goals. Connect with your loved ones as healthy social relationships can motivate and support you to accomplish long-term goals.
Kendra adds “Reach out to others, devote time to the ones you love, and be willing to let other people support you along the way.” Moreover, the support of your loved ones will also help to manage your anxiety and improve your mental health.
6. Look after yourself
Just because you love your work and enjoy being successful, doesn’t mean you will ignore your own needs. Success without happiness is meaningless. And happiness starts with self love and self care. Make sure to take care of yourself even when you are busy pursuing your goals and dreams.
Kendra suggests “Do not overlook your well-being, both physical and mental, just so you can keep your nose to that grindstone. Give yourself breaks, reward your efforts, and do something each day that will benefit your health and wellness.”
Let go of your need to achieve more
Overachievement is a disorder and it’s contagious. Amanda Smear Baudier explains “Our parents and teachers gave it to us, and we proudly pass it onto our peers.” But the good news is that we can choose to stop. We can stop being afraid of failure. We can stop running from one accomplishement to the other. We can stop comparing ourselves with others. We can stop forcing ourselves to compete. We can stop judging, self-sabotaging and self-criticizing. We can break the cycle.
You can be happy just by being yourself. By doing what you love, even if you don’t succeed at times. And that’s okay. “We all have a unique purpose to unfold in this lifetime and the sooner we stop trying to one up one another, the sooner we’ll find the path to that which will truly bring us joy,” adds Amanda.
Author Kendra Cherry, MS concludes that overachievement “can be unhealthy and contribute to stress, poor relationships, and fear. Fortunately, taking a step back and focusing more on the quality of your success rather than the quantity can help you gain a better perspective on personal achievement.”