Instead of arguing till both of you are blue in the face about whatever issues are affecting you and blowing off your anger on the other person, you can work on the problem while still showing each other respect and consideration. This will keep both of you together while also strengthening the very foundation of the relationship.
3. Partners being able to focus on the bright side of things
Fisher also argues for the importance of having positive illusions in order to make the relationship strong enough to last in the long run. Positive illusions are like having pep-talks to inspire you to stay in the relationship. For example, you might have found your boyfriend’s snort while laughing very endearing when you first started dating but now that some time has passed, the sound begins to grate on you.
Rather than concentrating on what you don’t like, think about all the other instances when he is not making that noise. Doing this allows you to consider him in a different way. You can look at his character and his habits without feeling the need to high-tail it out of your relationship as fast as you can. Think about all the beautiful traits that your partner has; not about the few annoying habits they have. Sometimes, we just completely absorb ourselves in all the things we perceive as negative about our partners and let them take over all the quirks that we love about them.
Instead, if we just took the time to concentrate on all the wonderful things about the relationship, we can keep it going. It’s important to remember that we are all human and this naturally makes us flawed. So just look on the bright side to find happiness.
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