They also know they can’t completely trust every emotion or thought. They are aware of how it makes them feel and how to rationalize the validity and truth behind them. They use their emotions as an antenna to help translate what’s happening around them, but they are the ones who ultimately choose how to respond to them.
They’re not afraid to voice out their thoughts and feelings, even if they’re incomplete.
They’re accepting of the fact that intelligence is not solely based on intellect or logic. Life has unspoken energy that connects us in ways we don’t understand, or would ever need to understand. There are things that require no words or reasoning.
Curiosity is what inspires the emotionally intelligent. They love learning. They want to get to the root of things. They know when to dig deep and when to back off.
They know when there’s a struggle and will ask the right questions at the right time. They show interest, but they don’t pry. They know that they don’t have to know everything right away.
They’re willing to give their partner all of their attention because they want to understand them, why they say the things they say, what makes them think the way they think.
5. Understand the love languages
A partner who has high emotional intelligence understands how to love.
They know that people give and receive love differently.
Some will use words.
Some will show them, do things for them.
Some will spend time with them.
Some will give them gifts.
And some will touch them in all the right ways.
They know how to communicate what kind of love they need and want. They know how to grow. They know, like any language, that it takes practice. It takes work. It takes making many mistakes and learning from each of them.
6. Respect people’s decisions
An emotionally intelligent person respects the choices of their partner. They know that there doesn’t have to be one right answer. They know when to provide guidance and when to let them explore.
They encourage them with whatever they decide if it will inspire growth. They create space for their partner to fill it. They’re their partner in crime, their accomplice to everything joyful, naughty, and risky.
They trust them, they believe in them, and they don’t do it blindly. They’ll spark discussion as a form of feedback. They let them be them.
7. Emotionally resilient
Being emotionally intelligent is synonymous with being emotionally resilient.
They’re able to weather through tough times. They accept that adversity is inevitable, that things are going to happen outside of their control. They understand their strengths and weaknesses, when to do something about them, and when to move on.
They understand that failure is not defeat, as long as they learn from it. They know when to surrender so they can prepare for the next fight.
They re-frame their mind and experience towards optimism, towards something they can take action towards. They see the benefits of whatever situation they’re in, rather than sulk over all of the negatives. They maintain composure, while not being afraid to be vulnerable or ask for help when they need it. They are confident in their beliefs so much that they’re willing to listen to opposing opinions.
Emotionally resilient people properly respond to what’s happening internally or externally, rather than react on impulse. They appreciate time and patience.
8. Look for connection
A partner who values emotional intelligence likes to connect deeply.
They might not be extroverted all the time, but they get along with their friends, parents, and siblings. They are comfortable spending time alone with each of them. They value the human experience. They can empathize with pain and struggle, and they will celebrate joy and excitement.
They are unapologetically themselves and still willing to learn from anyone they meet. They express their opinions while accepting those of others. They are aware of who they’re speaking to and how their audience receives information. They connect to the hearts and minds of those they care about.