Why The Pain of Non Belief or Doubting Victims Is More Horrific Than Abuse Itself

If you choose to make assumptions, blame that victim in some way for what occurred, judge them, blame their mental health etc – and that victim is telling the truth – you are abusing them further – even if unintentionally.

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We live in a society where it is ‘innocent until proven guilty’.

And also where is a victim is ‘lying/exaggerating’ unless they can prove the abuse 100%’.

There are many who will argue we need to have innocent until proven guilty and I agree, we do.

But, in the case of abuse victims – please know – this abuses and re-traumatises them repeatedly.

And ‘not guilty’ or not having enough evidence to prove the abuse 100% – does not mean the victim was lying. Or that the abuser is innocent – but society wants to view it that way.

And regardless of all the arguments for all this……..bottom line, it is devastating and is more abuse to the victim.

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I know this, because I have been there. Too many times.


~ Lilly Hope Lucario

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Shelley Ricci

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