6. Choose your battles
Nobody is perfect. All of us have some special qualities and some really annoying habits. Pick your battles wisely and you will realize how easy it is to save your relationships. When you criticize your partner constantly, they will spend more time thinking about the negative aspects of the relationship. So choose what issue you want to point out and which ones you need to let go of.
Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., family therapist and research scientist with the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan, tells WebMD “You can’t have a conflict over everything. We call it ‘kitchen sinking’ – bringing up things that happened five, 10 years ago.”
Are you being nitpicked?
If you are being constantly criticized, demeaned, and belittled by your partner or spouse, then you need to have an open and honest conversation with them. Let them know how their behavior is affecting you personally and your commitment to the relationship. This can certainly be challenging, but it is crucial that you have this discussion.
Marriage consultant Sheri Stritof suggests “Describe the hurt and pain you feel from this behavior. Let your spouse know that when you think you’re being nitpicked, you won’t overreact but you will say ‘enough’ and leave the room.”
This will help your partner become aware of their negative behavior. However, if their toxic behavior continues it can be best to seek professional help and counseling.
Here is an interesting video that you may find helpful: