10 Reasons Why Narcissists Target Married People

Reasons Why Narcissists Target Married People

7. We will readily invent tales of your spouse’s supposed misdemeanors and/or manufacture them.

A Lieutenant will be sent to flirt with your husband and we will provide you with footage to show their entanglement (of course we remove the part where your husband tells her where to go). Another Lieutenant will be sent to get your wife drunk or slip drugs into her handbag for you to find later, ramping up our suggestions that she is selfish and tripping the light fantastic whilst you stay at home looking after the children.

Why are you putting up with that when you could leave and be with someone who really appreciates you?

8. Everybody has their price.

Nobody is immune and above being manipulated into a position whereby they are seduced by us. Yes, some may take longer than others, but combine the target’s susceptibility, the fact they may be in a difficult relationship, the fact they may be bored or lonely, the fact we are exciting and invigorating, the fact we will manipulate the battlefield so it is always in our favor and you have a situation where it is impossible for someone to resist us.

We will secure our married target. Ultimately, if there are those who are impervious to our overtures, we won’t target them, to begin with.

Related: Who Is A Malignant Narcissist And How Do They Destroy Someone Emotionally

The dynamic of the married target and the narcissist also has to be addressed. We may see a ring on a finger of a person in a bar and opt to make them an Intimate Partner Tertiary Source by sleeping with them that night before they slink away to their spouse. We may never bother with them again, but fuel has been obtained, Thought Fuel gained thinking of the unseen spouse wondering where their wife or husband is and the ratification of our power achieved.

More often the married target becomes a Non Intimate Secondary Source. We worm our way in as a wonderful friend, but this is a mere staging post as we hurtle towards bedding them and making them an Intimate Partner Secondary Source. They may be a Dirty Little Secret, a colleague who we rut in the empty offices at work, or who scurries away from their spouse under the pretense of attending the gym before meeting us in the back of our car in a shadowy car park.

We may have no pressing need to make them our IPPS and therefore we are content to utilize that person as a Shelf IPSS, organizing a night away together when he pretends he is on a business trip or calling in to work on the basis of being unwell to spend an afternoon together.

We may bring you into our world, letting you meet friends and family, seeing you intermittently, content to show you our enticing world and then place you on the shelf, leaving you longing for more, pining for us at weekends when you must be with your family and we are engaging with our own IPPS or a different IPSS.

We may hit the motherlode and realize you ought to be our IPPS and as our Candidate IPSS we go all out to smear your spouse, entice you and roll out all our dazzling illusions to show you that you need to leave him, be free, and be yourself but with us. We will coax, cajole and entice, showing you the forbidden fruits and the liberation that awaits you at our supposedly benevolent rescuing hand.

The more we smear your innocent spouse and the more we shower you with the love-bombing, your resistance will erode. Your emotional thinking will subsume your cool, hard logic as you become swept up at the moment, and your emotional thinking cons you as it whispers to you –

“You have been a wife and a mother for twenty years, never complaining, it is time you started living.”
“She is just not interested in sex anymore and you have needs, here is someone who makes you feel alive again.”
“She just takes you for granted. Here is someone who values you.”
“Yes he will be hurt if you leave but he will get over it. You deserve to be happy don’t you?”

Oh, the excuses will come pouring and of course, we will not dissuade you from thinking in this way. We will say and do whatever is needed to get what we want. Charming you and painting your spouse as evil, awful and selfish.

The simple fact is that all people are targets. Married targets are often even better targets.


Written by HG Tudor 
Originally appeared on Narcsite
Republished with permission
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10 Reasons Why Narcissists Target Married People
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10 Reasons Why Narcissists Target Married People
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